# Laptops are stupid and shitty. Why would anyone buy one? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 20, 2007, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648 "2007-12-20T00:46:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/1 "2007-12-20T00:46:15Z")
This is the lamest pitting I’ll ever write, but I have to get it off my chest. Laptops are stupid. Even the best ones have crap performance due to all the little weird design and architecture compromises that they have to make, and they’re physically inconvenient to work on. They’re significantly more expensive than desktops and don’t work nearly as well. I’ve never seen one with a battery life worth a damn, and most of them operate in any number of performance-killing economy modes in order to squeeze more precious time out of their already anemic battery lives, so most of the time you’re stuck plugging the damned thing in anyway. They’re hard to upgrade. They get too hot and can’t cool themselves properly, often resorting to baking-hot temperatures and jet engine-loud fans working overtime in an attempt to keep everything from bursting into flames. You can’t actually recline and use one in your lap for an extended period of time or you’ll block the vents. You look like a self-important douchebag for using one in public, especially in places like coffeeshops or restaurants, but _especially_ on public transportation. Most of them are so fucking huge now that they won’t fit anywhere or on anything anyway. Laptops are pieces of shit! ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/2 "2007-12-20T00:49:18Z")
I enjoy my laptop. It suits my lifestyle. But then, I am a stupid, shitty person, so it would, wouldn’t it. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/3 "2007-12-20T00:50:22Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] This is the lamest pitting I’ll ever write… [/QUOTE] Based on your previous form, i doubt it. But it is pretty lame. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/4 "2007-12-20T00:53:36Z")
OK, **VCO3**. Given your history of starting Pit threads and then never returning ([latest example](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=447031)), we’re going to have a special rule for you. No more dropping Pit threads like steaming turds and then never returning. If you don’t want to discuss a subject, don’t start the thread. If you start a thread and never come back (or make only fake, token responses to get past this new rule on a technicality), you’re going to start racking up warnings. Note to all: this rule applies only to **VCO3** and his adherence to it will be judged by the mods (rather than some arbitrary minimum quota of posts per thread). ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/5 "2007-12-20T00:55:43Z")
: Pats **VCO3** on his soft head. : There, there, dear. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/6 "2007-12-20T00:56:02Z")
Huh. My one and only work PC is a laptop. Runs cool as a cucumber, and quiet, even when cranking away at full power. Perhaps if the OP got a good laptop, his problems would go away? ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/7 "2007-12-20T00:59:55Z")
[QUOTE=gotpasswords] Huh. My one and only work PC is a laptop. Runs cool as a cucumber, and quiet, even when cranking away at full power. Perhaps if the OP got a good laptop, his problems would go away? [/QUOTE] But he would still look like a self-important douchebag for using it in public. Well… MORE. ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/8 "2007-12-20T01:00:20Z")
To respond to the OP: My laptop (an IBM/Lenovo R series) doesn’t have a heinously loud fan, doesn’t overheat on my lap (vents on the side), and the economy mode just dims the screen a little. While the battery life is only about 45 minutes, the benefits of being able to haul it around to coffee shops, work, home, and to check out the dope while I’m in bed far outweigh any difficulties upgrading the thing, anyways. Who upgrades computers, anymore? By the time a computer isn’t up to standard, it’s almost always easier to just buy a new box with gizmos included. Laptops rock. Punk. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/9 "2007-12-20T01:03:10Z")
Unh, portability? Ya tink? ---
**Author:** ![gazpacho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6f9a4e/32.png) [@gazpacho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gazpacho)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/10 "2007-12-20T01:12:23Z")
Lap tops have outsold desktops for the past few years. So a lot of people seem to disagree. This is just bitching and moaning by VCO3 because he is to poor to get a laptop. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/11 "2007-12-20T01:16:41Z")
If I had a laptop, I would take it on long airplane flights, and use it to model simple electronic circuits. ---
**Author:** ![Jayn\_Newell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jayn\_Newell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayn_Newell)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/12 "2007-12-20T01:18:27Z")
It’s just one of those things where you have to pick which better suits your needs. If you need performance, get a desktop. If you need portability, get a laptop. If you need both, you’d better be prepared to drop a few grand on a machine, or get one of each. I had a laptop in college for a couple years. The portability was nice, but I decided performance was more important to me and have a desktop now. ---
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/13 "2007-12-20T01:19:07Z")
[QUOTE=Giraffe] OK, **VCO3**. Given your history of starting Pit threads and then never returning ([latest example](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=447031)), we’re going to have a special rule for you. No more dropping Pit threads like steaming turds and then never returning. If you don’t want to discuss a subject, don’t start the thread. If you start a thread and never come back (or make only fake, token responses to get past this new rule on a technicality), you’re going to start racking up warnings. Note to all: this rule applies only to **VCO3** and his adherence to it will be judged by the mods (rather than some arbitrary minimum quota of posts per thread). [/QUOTE] I find this incredibly offensive - since when is the Pit a forum like “Great Debates?” Since when do I have to defend pittings, and meet some sort of quota of posts to make one? I feel unfairly singled out. I’ll take it up with you in PM’s. ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/14 "2007-12-20T01:20:26Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] I find this incredibly offensive - since when is the Pit a forum like “Great Debates?” Since when do I have to defend pittings, and meet some sort of quota of posts to make one? I feel unfairly singled out. I’ll take it up with you in PM’s. [/QUOTE] I can’t speak for the mods, but my guess would be since you started using the SDMB like a Livejournal. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/15 "2007-12-20T01:21:29Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] I find this incredibly offensive - since when is the Pit a forum like “Great Debates?” Since when do I have to defend pittings, and meet some sort of quota of posts to make one? I feel unfairly singled out. I’ll take it up with you in PM’s. [/QUOTE] It’s not Great Debates, but neither is it your personal rant blog. If you don’t want to interact with people, don’t post on a message board. ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/16 "2007-12-20T01:24:16Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] I find this incredibly offensive - since when is the Pit a forum like “Great Debates?” Since when do I have to defend pittings, and meet some sort of quota of posts to make one? I feel unfairly singled out. I’ll take it up with you in PM’s. [/QUOTE] Since 4:53pm today, apparently… ---
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/17 "2007-12-20T01:25:21Z")
[QUOTE=Giraffe] It’s not Great Debates, but neither is it your personal rant blog. If you don’t want to interact with people, don’t post on a message board. [/QUOTE] I took this up with you in PM’s, but I just wanted to respond that using the pit IS interacting, by virtue of soliciting responses. ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/18 "2007-12-20T01:28:09Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] I took this up with you in PM’s, but I just wanted to respond that using the pit IS interacting, by virtue of soliciting responses. [/QUOTE] There’s a word for posting something solely to “solicit responses” instead of have a conversation … ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/19 "2007-12-20T01:28:15Z")
I can’t get as worked up as the OP’er, but I agree with his general premise. Everything he says is true; short battery life, loud fans, hot temperatures plague even the most expensive brands and models. I also find laptop keyboards to be less-than-optimal. I don’t like using trackpads either. All that being said, I’m glad they’re readily available in all shapes and sizes. I have several desktops between work and home, but sometimes the MacBook Pro is very convenient and I can work (or post messages like this one) in the comfort of my living room. I don’t think however that I could have JUST a laptop, due to the aforementioned limitations. If I had to make a choice, I’d go with a desktop. (even this $3000 MacBook Pro has loud fans and runs very hot if it sits directly on your lap) ---
**Author:** ![Idlewild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8491ac/32.png) [@Idlewild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idlewild)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648/20 "2007-12-20T01:30:46Z")
I am posting from the couch. As usual. I love my laptop. I have no desire to be chained to a flat surface when computing at home. Until such time as I can jack in to the ubiquitous network by means of a plug in the back of my head, a laptop fills the gap nicely. Plus, I can play solitaire when I get bored of feeding the trolls. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/laptops-are-stupid-and-shitty-why-would-anyone-buy-one/430648.md?page=2)