# Lasagne for clueless bachelors who can't fry water. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 5, 2015, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030 "2015-08-05T02:16:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/21 "2015-08-05T08:59:41Z")
Since frying by definition involves cooking in oil at above the boiling point of water, isn’t it actually impossible to fry water? ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/22 "2015-08-05T09:05:02Z")
As a clueless bachelor, I prefer dishes that take literally less than 15 minutes to both prepare and make: - omelette - stir fry ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/23 "2015-08-05T12:14:38Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Since frying by definition involves cooking in oil at above the boiling point of water, isn’t it actually impossible to fry water? I worked in a restaurant once. A cruel trick to play on the fry chef was to toss a small piece of ice into his fryer as you walked by. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/24 "2015-08-05T13:28:11Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Since frying by definition involves cooking in oil at above the boiling point of water, isn’t it actually impossible to fry water? You have to bread it first. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/25 "2015-08-05T13:31:47Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I worked in a restaurant once. A cruel trick to play on the fry chef was to toss a small piece of ice into his fryer as you walked by. It’s not cruel. It’s all in fun. That’s why we’d splash hot oil on you, just for the laughs. ---
**Author:** ![Aquadementia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aquadementia/32/555_2.png) [@Aquadementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aquadementia)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/26 "2015-08-05T13:37:17Z")
Lasagne, if that is its real name, is too fussy with all its layers and arranging things. Here’s the quick way to do it. All the equipment you need is the dish you are going to bake it in and a spoon. Get everything for the lasagne recipe except forget the lasagne noodles. Just get a couple cups of macaroni or fusilli noodles instead. Dump everything in dish, mix and throw some extra mozzarella on top to make it look pretty then shove it in the oven. It’s the same thing except without an hour of playing with noodles. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/27 "2015-08-05T13:52:44Z")
My dad and I used to make lasagne together when I was a very young kid, and I learned enough about making it so that I was able to guide my mother through the process of making it when she tried making it without my dad around. Though I’ve since forgotten how to make it, it probably wouldn’t be difficult to re-learn. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/28 "2015-08-05T13:56:01Z")
> [@Rhiannon8404](#): > > I always assumed he was eating Stouffer’s. Most frozen food is awful but I always thought Stouffer’s frozen lasagna was pretty good. And yes, homemade is probably better and cheaper, but the frozen single-serving packages are really convenient; I could pull one out of the freezer when I couldn’t think of anything else to eat, and they reheated in the microwave in about six or seven minutes. Plus there’s little to wash, aside from the fork and the plastic tray (so I can recycle it). And if you want to save money, Stouffer’s has a “family size” package, with seven servings. It’s usually ten bucks at my supermarket. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/29 "2015-08-05T13:59:12Z")
Probably the easiest way we’ve found to make lasagna is to make a pot of ragu ([Anna Nanni's Ragù alla Bolognese | Saveur](http://www.saveur.com/article/Recipes/Anna-Nannis-Ragu-alla-Bolognese)) and then use whatever we don’t eat straight up with pasta as the meat/sauce base of lasagna, along with the usual ricotta, lasagna noodles, etc… If you don’t want to make the ragu, I’d think you could easily get the meat variant of jarred pasta sauce and add it to an appropriate amount of cooked ground beef so that it has a thick and non-liquid consistency and go from there. It’s really not complicated- just layers of meat/sauce, cheese and noodles. You can jazz it up with stuff like parsley in your ricotta or layers of multiple meats (but for God’s sake, no breakfast sausage!) if you want to. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/30 "2015-08-05T14:02:27Z")
It’s not top ramen easy, but making ok-to-good lasagna is pretty straightforward and it’s hard to go really wrong with it. The recipe on the back of the box of noodles (no cook noodles are even easier) is a good starting point. ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/31 "2015-08-05T16:11:55Z")
We went out to eat at a chain pizza place Friday night but I didn’t want pizza so I ordered the lasagna. It came out with the middle still cold, obviously a frozen product put into a microwave or convection oven. I sent it back (and they took it off the bill), but it came back boiling hot. The noodles had essentially dissolved into a soup of tomato and cheese soup - not good. So, wanting some good lasagna, I made essentially what XaMcQ wrote. The family raved and it really wasn’t that much work. It might have been even faster than frozen Stouffer’s since it didn’t take 75 minutes to bake. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/32 "2015-08-05T16:24:31Z")
The recipe & instructions are right there on the box… ---
**Author:** ![puddleglum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puddleglum/32/137_2.png) [@puddleglum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puddleglum)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/33 "2015-08-05T16:25:10Z")
> [@XaMcQ](#): > > Lasagna can be simple or hard depending on how fussy you are about it. If you are willing to buy a can of sauce, a box of noodles, pre-shredded cheeses, and a tub of either cottage or ricotta cheese, you can put a big pan of it together in about half an hour. Or you could make your own sauce, your own pasta, etc. > > Here’s the very simple recipe I use. > > 1 jar your favorite spaghetti sauce > 1 box lasagna pasta > 1 tub cottage cheese > 1 larger pkg Sargento shredded 4 cheese Italian > 1lb breakfast sausage, Jimmy Dean’s Sage is my fave, but any will do. > Salt and olive oil > > First, get a very large pot of water boiling, and add about a tablespoon of salt to it. > > While your water is heating, fry up your sausage, stirring continuously till there’s no pink showing, then move the cooked sausage into a bowl lined with paper towels to drain. > > When your water comes to a boil, put in your pasta, and stir frequently to make sure it does not stick together. Cook them long enough to get limp but no longer. You don’t want them to get mushy. When they are done, drain off most of the water and run some cold water in to stop them from cooking, and add a little olive oil to prevent them from sticking together. > > Now oil up your lasagna pan. If you skip this step, it will be a bear to clean. > Put in some sauce, a layer of noodles, sausage, then a layer of cheese. > Repeat, adding the cottage cheese in somewhere in the middle layers, till you run out of noodles, then dump the rest of the sauce and cheese on top. > > Optionally, you can add sliced black olives, canned mushrooms, spinach, or very thinly sliced squash, zucchini or Japanese. eggplant > > Bake at 350F for 1/2 hour. Let stand for about ten minutes before serving. > > Makes about 8 servings. You can get no boil lasagna noodles which allow you to skip that step which can be a pain since the boiled noodles stick together and rip sometime. Use ricotta cheese and not cottage. It makes the lasagna less runny. Italian sausage would be just as easy as breakfast sausage and taste a little more authentic. You just have to remove the casing before frying. I like to add a layer of mozzarella on top of the lasagna before baking. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/34 "2015-08-05T16:59:39Z")
\ \>They have noodles that do not require boiling. That’s what you want to use. Then \>just layer your sauce and cheese. You can use sauce from a jar, just add some \>cooked meat and and maybe some sautéed onions and peppers . Then use \>whatever cheese you like. \>It’s not too difficult really. It’s easy to change it up too. Use a white sauce and \>chicken. Throw in a layer of spinach. \>You can get pretty creative with it. I would agree - white sauce/spinach also is great with scallops, or shrimp, or even lobster chunks. I have a friend who makes it with thin sliced zucchini instead of pasta for a celiac spouse - all from scratch so the white sauce is thickened with tapioca instead of flour. I did a fra diavolo lasagne with assorted seafood for our roomies birthday last year that she loved. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/35 "2015-08-05T17:06:11Z")
My mom and I do a lasagna with sweet Italian sausage, butternut squash, and white sauce every fall. Super delicious, but a pain in the ass. Takes about 60 minutes to put it together with both of us working, and dirties every pan in the kitchen. Straightforward lasagna, though, that’s pretty easy. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/36 "2015-08-05T17:07:59Z")
You do not need “no-boil” noodles. Uncooked regular noodles are less expensive and work just fine to soak up liquid, as **terentii** mentioned. Save the money to get a better box of wine. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/37 "2015-08-05T17:12:37Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > It’s not cruel. It’s all in fun. That’s why we’d splash hot oil on you, just for the laughs. [I did it as a goof!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cz0LY0I5bLA) ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/38 "2015-08-05T17:14:58Z")
My wife can’t fry water, but she sure can burn it. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/39 "2015-08-05T17:15:46Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > You do not need “no-boil” noodles. Uncooked regular noodles are less expensive and work just fine to soak up liquid, as **terentii** mentioned. > > Save the money to get a better box of wine. Box? I get my wine by the six-pack of cans. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030/40 "2015-08-05T17:16:15Z")
I’m sure it would make a real Italian cry but my mom, who never really learned to cook, made lasagne by layering cooked noodles with a meat sauce consisting of ground beef, Prego, and cottage cheese. Never had a problem with it being runny. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lasagne-for-clueless-bachelors-who-cant-fry-water/727030.md?page=3)