# Last week, I was hospitalized after a suicide attempt **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 14, 2011, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506 "2011-06-14T23:51:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/21 "2011-06-15T04:14:26Z")
> [@Shayna](#): > > This has to be one of the most insensitive posts I’ve ever read here. “Man up”?? You clearly have no _clue_ about depression and how it affects even the most mundane things, like even _getting out of bed_. Man up? WTF? Well, my doctor either thinks I have depression, or he’s just randomly passing out prescriptions for drugs that aren’t any fun. I know how hard it can be to get out of bed. And frankly, sometimes I don’t. I know what it is to go to bed wishing for death, and wake up disappointed it didn’t happen. Again. I know how it felt when a good friend of mine committed suicide last year. I saw what it did to his family. Including his grandmother who found the body. And his mother who’d been clean for 20 years. And now she isn’t. And his friends that don’t want to be mad at him for what he did…but are, kinda. So yeah. I say man the fuck up. My friend didn’t, and he’s dead now. I did, and my ornery old ass is still alive. As long as that continues to be the case, there’s a chance that tomorrow will be a better day. ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/22 "2011-06-15T04:22:32Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Well, my doctor either thinks I have depression, or he’s just randomly passing out prescriptions for drugs that aren’t any fun. > > I know how hard it can be to get out of bed. And frankly, sometimes I don’t. > > I know what it is to go to bed wishing for death, and wake up disappointed it didn’t happen. Again. > > I know how it felt when a good friend of mine committed suicide last year. I saw what it did to his family. Including his grandmother who found the body. And his mother who’d been clean for 20 years. And now she isn’t. And his friends that don’t want to be mad at him for what he did…but are, kinda. > > So yeah. I say man the fuck up. My friend didn’t, and he’s dead now. I did, and my ornery old ass is still alive. As long as that continues to be the case, there’s a chance that tomorrow will be a better day. Tough love can be appropriate, especially for depressives. I know this because I am one. But I’ll admit that I, too, was raising an eyebrow and scratching my head a wee bit at the tone of your earlier post. Is it really the time or the place to be trotting out the tough love, in MPSIMS, right now? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/23 "2011-06-15T04:27:11Z")
> [@Sierra\_Indigo](#): > > Tough love can be appropriate, especially for depressives. I know this because I am one. But I’ll admit that I, too, was raising an eyebrow and scratching my head a wee bit at the tone of your earlier post. Is it really the time or the place to be trotting out the tough love, in MPSIMS, right now? I dunno. I see a guy asking for help in a situation I understand. I offered the best advice I’ve got, and I believe it to be valid. ---
**Author:** ![Sierra\_Indigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Sierra\_Indigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sierra_Indigo)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/24 "2011-06-15T04:32:27Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I dunno. I see a guy asking for help in a situation I understand. I offered the best advice I’ve got, and I believe it to be valid. Might I suggest your tone was more than a little combative, and perhaps the suck it up lesson may have been better served by PM or in not such a public place? Yeah, being tough and telling someone to pull their finger out can work as I said. But being called to the mat and being told to Man Up and GTFOver it, especially in a public forum, can also push someone completely the other way. And you don’t know which way the OP’s going to lean. Like anything else in life, what worked for you can be the exact polar opposite for someone else, despite all other things being equal. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/25 "2011-06-15T04:42:44Z")
> [@Sierra\_Indigo](#): > > Might I suggest your tone was more than a little combative, and perhaps the suck it up lesson may have been better served by PM or in not such a public place? > > Yeah, being tough and telling someone to pull their finger out can work as I said. But being called to the mat and being told to Man Up and GTFOver it, especially in a public forum, can also push someone completely the other way. And you don’t know which way the OP’s going to lean. Like anything else in life, what worked for you can be the exact polar opposite for someone else, despite all other things being equal. My approach is what it is. I didn’t mean to offend, and I apologize for doing so. Also think I’ll just bow out of the thread now. This isn’t about me. You can Pit me, or start another thread about tough love if you’d like. ---
**Author:** ![Lucky\_13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucky_13/32/13209_2.png) [@Lucky\_13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucky_13)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/26 "2011-06-15T04:49:52Z")
((((( **Duke** and family))))) I was diagnosed with clinical depression after my latest round of medical tests. This is in addition to the occasional migraine, which I described in a previous thread devoted to the subject. I won’t bore you guys with the details. All I want to say is that I have some idea of what you’ve been through, because I’ve experienced it, and to wish you the best of luck and send positive thoughts your way. ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/27 "2011-06-15T04:54:07Z")
Hi Duke. I’m glad you’re alive and posting. FWIW, I also have serious depression and migraines, and high blood pressure. I found that getting on a good blood pressure regime helped prevent the migraines. I wanted to post a link here - it’s the website for the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. They have listings for crisis centers around the US. They also have a presence on Facebook or MySpace, if you use those services. > **[Home](https://988lifeline.org/)** Here’s their page with direct information for getting help: [http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/Default.aspx](http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/Default.aspx) The number for their hotline is 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You might want to put that number on a post it and stick it to your phone. Programming it into your cellphone is a good idea too. That way if things get bad, you don’t have to go looking for it. Don’t hesitate to call them. They won’t think you’re overreacting or anything. They want to hear from you. In the short term, your personal physician can refer you to a good therapist, and possibly help you with meds. Don’t be embarrassed. You won’t be the first person your doctor has done this for. You doctor will be happy to help you. Take care. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/28 "2011-06-15T04:58:38Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I dunno. I see a guy asking for help in a situation I understand. I offered the best advice I’ve got, and I believe it to be valid. You must have some extremely penetrating vision to see him asking for help, since no such request exists in the OP. Sorry to hear about your personal struggles and glad you found a way to combat them, though. ---
**Author:** ![T.Slothrop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3e96dc/32.png) [@T.Slothrop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T.Slothrop)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/29 "2011-06-15T05:54:03Z")
Originally Posted by Oakminster “I dunno. I see a guy asking for help in a situation I understand. I offered the best advice I’ve got, and I believe it to be valid.” I agree with Oakminster word for word in a situation I also understand. Jon ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/30 "2011-06-15T06:04:05Z")
I’ve been to that place where you just don’t want to go on anymore. I totally concur with **Merneith** in asking that you please please call someone when you need to. I sincerely wish you strength and luck. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/31 "2011-06-15T06:25:57Z")
**Duke** , thanks for writing to us! We’ve never interacted before, but I too have many depressive issues which are now chemically under control. I won’t mention their names, but I am on three anti-depressives, and have never heard of that many different ones being prescribed, but they work. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, **Duke** , and applaud you for seeing things as they are and wanting to tough it through enough to let us, your friends on The Dope, know about them. I hope you will keep us updated as to your progress and hope you are setting a great example to the rest of us for speaking up as you have. It means you have “inner strength”, and that’s important. Good luck! Bill ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/32 "2011-06-15T06:38:18Z")
Too late to edit, but please ignore the word “hope” in that last paragraph. Noticed it too late, but the sentence was _meant_ to read: “_and_ you are setting…” Thanks Q ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/33 "2011-06-15T07:00:23Z")
Many people on this board have suffered from depression in the past. You’re among friends here. Hang in there. ---
**Author:** ![Lochdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/edb3f5/32.png) [@Lochdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lochdale)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/34 "2011-06-15T07:07:04Z")
Not sure it would help but if you are ever in Chicago I’d gladly meet and buy you a pint. Hang in there. ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/35 "2011-06-15T07:17:08Z")
So much of the medical care I’ve gotten here, in terms of depression, mirrors yours exactly. Gah! I don’t get migraines, and can’t begin to even get my mind around the intolerable pain of them. The depression part I get though. I am very glad you’re still here. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/36 "2011-06-15T11:48:20Z")
I’m sorry for what you’re going through, **Duke**. Hang in there, and I hope the SDMB can provide some support. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/37 "2011-06-15T12:20:28Z")
> [@Duke](#): > > I am trying to keep those under control, but to be honest when you have a migraine headache every single day for a month with almost no respite, then after finally getting some relief the headaches come back twice as bad you lose it. My blood pressure went haywire. When I was admitted on Sunday I was at 181/125–the paramedic had to take it twice because he thought he did something wrong. I’ve actually had this type of migraine before - once while I was pregnant. My blood pressure went so high they decided to induce labour because they were worried about Junior. Was this headache the reason that you attempted suicide? I can really empathize if it is - I’ve had headaches so bad that I’m throwing up and pounding my head against the floor trying to get some relief. Stupid question, but have they treated this aspect? Do you have a plan in place in case another headache like this crops up? Regarding everything else - I’m so sorry for your trouble - hang in there. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/38 "2011-06-15T12:57:39Z")
Duke, thanks for posting. I personally have known three people who committed suicide. I wish they could have been around to see the grief and anguish that their choice caused others. Please don’t feel like the world would be better off without you. It’s not true. Sometimes those around you can become immune to your pain because they feel helpless and frustrated. The only thing worse than your own suffering is watching someone you love suffer, and being helpless to stop it. You have not failed; medicine has failed you. No one should be forced to live in constant pain. So my advice is to keep trying different doctors. In the United States, we are so caught up in chemical relief and treating specific ailments involving specific body parts that we rarely look at the big picture and treat patients as a whole. You might find more luck, and the relief that you need, seeking non-traditional healers, especially those trained in Asia. They approach medicine in an entirely different way. So, please, look up “holistic doctors” in your area, if you haven’t done so already, and give them a try. Good luck to you and please keep posting. ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/39 "2011-06-15T13:09:45Z")
Duke, I admire you for posting about this. I can’t speak for everyone but I know it’s a lot easier to post about good stuff and accomplishments than it is to post about… other stuff. My experience with inpatient psychiatric care – as a support employee and as the wife of a patient – has been exactly what you described. It is there to keep someone alive (i.e., suicide watch) and to get their medications straight. Period. There may be some ‘groups’ but they are not that helpful. My husband started smoking during his second hospitalization because he was bored out of his mind during the copious downtime when the patients literally had nothing to do. I have also struggled with controlling my migraines, so frankly, I think I can understand that aspect of your situation as well. More than once I have broken down and sobbed because it’s been five days, a week of steady everyday headaches, and I just want them to stop. I also find that the migraine itself has a depressive effect on me, like I feel down for some time even after the headache might resolve. I won’t bore you with a lot of migraine advice, as we have had many threads on the SDMB about that, but I got the best results with an older suppressive medication, Inderal, which is a blood pressure medication. I hope you are under a doctor’s care for your physical issues, since blood pressure issues can affect so much of our sense of well-being. I also strongly encourage you to find a counselor or therapist with whom you feel comfortable. If you visit one and don’t ‘click’, by all means, try another. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506/40 "2011-06-15T13:14:00Z")
Duke, I hope you’re doing well, and glad you came back. I always need backup in fundraising threads, and someone to spar with a bit whenever the United Way comes up! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-week-i-was-hospitalized-after-a-suicide-attempt/585506.md?page=3)