# Last year wasn't a good one for undertakers

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [March 14, 2006, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249 "2006-03-14T00:08:53Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 7\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/1 "2006-03-14T00:08:53Z")

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Lower than expected mortality rates in 2005 in Australia have cast somewhat of a blight on the undertaking industry’s profits according to an article in this morning’s paper. However the industry expects business to pick up again soon:

> [@](#):
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> In what they hope is nothing more than a statistical quirk, undertakers are remembering 2005 as a black year for business with far fewer people having called on their services.
> 
> Described by market analysts as a “significant aberration”, the death rate dropped by an estimated 5 per cent last year - or about 7000 people - because of a warmer winter and fewer people dying from complications arising from the flu.
> 
> Industry watchers say the drop did bite into undertakers’ earnings. But as is the nature of an industry no one can avoid, funeral directors expect a recovery over the next two years as those who postponed the inevitable in 2005 finally meet their maker.

Source: [Sydney Morning Herald Tuesday 14 March 2006](http://www.smh.com.au/news/national/grave-times-as-grim-reaper-takes-holiday/2006/03/13/1142098404552.html)

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**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/2 "2006-03-14T00:32:34Z")

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I can just see them at one of their conferences acting really somber and a few reduced to tears at these statistics. Next years forecast really lightened the place up though.

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**Author:** ![cabdude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@cabdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cabdude)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/3 "2006-03-14T02:34:30Z")

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> [@](#):
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> But he agreed the industry would recover over the next two years. “It’s one of those things you can’t defer,” he said. “It’s like buying food … it’s a purchase you can’t defer.”

Good to see they are upbeat about it. Nothing worse than a depressed funeral director.

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**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/4 "2006-03-14T02:49:26Z")

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> [@cabdude](#):
>
> Good to see they are upbeat about it. Nothing worse than a depressed funeral director.

Better than a pissed off one. They know what to do with the bodies.

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**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/5 "2006-03-14T19:02:03Z")

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Many moons ago I worked for K-mart. The corporation also owned a life insurance company, Lone Star Life (yeah, I can remember that name from 20 years ago, but forget where I put my pen 20 seconds ago). At one annual meeting (thoughtfully broadcast into each store) the CEO was going over the prior year financials. When he got to Lone Star he said “Our insurance subsidiary was a drain on our overall earnings last year because…well, because more people died than we expected. Sorry to be indelicate folks, but that’s just how it is”.

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**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/6 "2006-03-14T22:02:44Z")

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> [@Shagnasty](#):
>
> I can just see them at one of their conferences acting really somber and a few reduced to tears at these statistics. Next years forecast really lightened the place up though.

Monty Python did a few undertaker sketches. I do believe one of the series of sketches involved solemnly marching around with a casket, then “lightening up” and dancing away 🙂

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**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\
**Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/last-year-wasnt-a-good-one-for-undertakers/348249/7 "2006-03-14T22:09:43Z")

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> [@Guinastasia](#):
>
> Better than a pissed off one. They know what to do with the bodies.

From the dubbed version of my favorite movie, [Mr. Vampire](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089371/) (The Police Official has fingered Sifu as the murderer of his cousin Mooney’s father):

> [@](#):
>
> Police Official: “Mooney, it’s all right, we’ve caught the killer.”  
> Mooney: “But Cousin, Sifu doesn’t need to kill anybody - he’s a mortician!”

😕
