# Latest stupid commercial thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 23, 2012, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102 "2012-07-23T02:40:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 25
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2014, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/481 "2014-06-20T16:22:14Z")
There’s an Infiniti Q50 commercial that’s irritating me right now. It’s called, accurately, [Distracted Driving](http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7DFD/infiniti-q50-distracted-driving) and features this complete fucking menace driving a Q50 while his mind doesn’t just wander but goes on a several month walkabout. The tag line of the commercial is: “It’s instinct to protect leaves you free to drive.” The problem is, the guy in question isn’t driving. He isn’t capable of driving a bumper car at the fair, much less an automobile, and his general competence level makes me wonder how he ever managed to afford anything more pricey than a Schwinn (which he’d immediately drive over a curb). I get it that drivers might occasionally get distracted, but this commercial is glorifying it as a way of life. The tag line might as well be “Go ahead and text your buddies – we’ll take care of the road.” I don’t want to be surrounded by complacent drivers – I want to be surrounded by drivers that are devoting every synapse to making sure that their car and my car don’t occupy the same space at the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2014, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/482 "2014-06-20T18:45:15Z")
There is a Nissan commercial that makes me get all stabby. It shows a guy with some Nissan shitbox driving with the windows down and the tunes cranked to 11. Everyone starts bobbing their head in time to the music and smiling. In reality the only people that do this are douchebags that only listen to totally shitty music, that none of the surrounding drivers want to hear. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2014, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/483 "2014-06-20T20:03:40Z")
There’s a Sam Adam’s commercial with a stupid guy trying to sound intelligent. It’s a testimonial commercial were the hatted hipster, after tasting the beer, says he’s been selling himself short. He obviously means he’s been selling the beer short. Why they kept his dumb ass in the commercial is beyond me. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2014, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/484 "2014-06-20T20:09:04Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > There is a Nissan commercial that makes me get all stabby. > It shows a guy with some Nissan shitbox driving with the windows down and the tunes cranked to 11. > Everyone starts bobbing their head in time to the music and smiling. > In reality the only people that do this are douchebags that only listen to totally shitty music, that none of the surrounding drivers want to hear. QFT. :mad: Too true, too true. ---
**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/485 "2014-06-21T18:54:16Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > There’s an Infiniti Q50 commercial that’s irritating me right now. It’s called, accurately, [Distracted Driving](http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7DFD/infiniti-q50-distracted-driving) and features this complete fucking menace driving a Q50 while his mind doesn’t just wander but goes on a several month walkabout. The tag line of the commercial is: > > “It’s instinct to protect leaves you free to drive.” > > The problem is, the guy in question isn’t driving. He isn’t capable of driving a bumper car at the fair, much less an automobile, and his general competence level makes me wonder how he ever managed to afford anything more pricey than a Schwinn (which he’d immediately drive over a curb). I get it that drivers might occasionally get distracted, but this commercial is glorifying it as a way of life. The tag line might as well be “Go ahead and text your buddies – we’ll take care of the road.” > > I don’t want to be surrounded by complacent drivers – I want to be surrounded by drivers that are devoting every synapse to making sure that their car and my car don’t occupy the same space at the same time. Yeah, I hated that one for the same reasons. In a similar vein, there are the commercials for cars with backup collision sensors and whatnot, usually showing clueless WASP backing quickly out of the driveway with a vacant smile on their face, only stopping the car when an alarm goes off warning them that they’re about to hit something… instead of, you know, turning their heads and checking their mirrors like the rest of the plebians. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2014, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/486 "2014-06-24T18:24:26Z")
There’s a commercial for some version of Jack Daniels where a dude intones, “This is the order ordered by the Order, making it the order of the Order. So, to the Order, we raise the order, hoping we’ve said all this in the correct order,” _pause_ _think_ _nod_ I don’t know about anyone else but I don’t find that all that convoluted. I can only assume the brand is marketing towards morons with a thing for homophones. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2014, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/487 "2014-06-24T18:32:08Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > There’s an Infiniti Q50 commercial … > “Its instinct to protect leaves you free to drive.” Oh how I hate that commercial. Talk about someone who shouldn’t be behind the wheel of anything! An accurate tag line would be “… leaves you free to space out behind the wheel if you can’t pay atten… _SQUIRREL!_” ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2014, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/488 "2014-06-26T07:51:20Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > There’s an Infiniti Q50 commercial that’s irritating me right now. It’s called, accurately, [Distracted Driving](http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7DFD/infiniti-q50-distracted-driving) and features this complete fucking menace driving a Q50 while his mind doesn’t just wander but goes on a several month walkabout. +1 The commercial where the guy is backing into his garage, and there’s a box of toys at the back, with a stuffed bunny staring helplessly at the oncoming bumper. The backup cameras let him back all the way back to 1mm from the bunny’s face. Whew.:mad: Okay dumbass, even if the backup sensors/camera is that good, what happens when you put the car in park and let your foot off the brake? The car rolls backwards 2 inches an bumps into your crap, and scratches up your bumper. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/489 "2014-07-08T15:37:56Z")
The Outback Steakhouse [commercial touting their Moonshine BBQ](http://www.youtube.com/user/OutbackSteakhouse1), “infused with the sweet taste of moonshine”. WTF? Moonshine tastes like scalding kerosene. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/490 "2014-07-08T15:51:53Z")
Will somebody deliver a flaming shot to the head with a holy-water-hollowpoint silver bullet to the La Quinta Inn “stupid presentation of literal metaphor” commercials that continue to stagger across the land like half-rotted zombies? ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/491 "2014-07-08T15:57:53Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > The Outback Steakhouse [commercial touting their Moonshine BBQ](http://www.youtube.com/user/OutbackSteakhouse1), “infused with the sweet taste of moonshine”. WTF? Moonshine tastes like scalding kerosene. Yeah, or at best like vodka, which has little taste. It certainly does not/should not taste “sweet”.😕 ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/492 "2014-07-08T18:40:43Z")
Skunk makes it sweet. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/493 "2014-07-08T21:06:16Z")
> [@AncientHumanoid](#): > > Skunk makes it sweet. ^Today’s _Best Post_ prizewinner!!! I just started seeing a commercial which is so reassuring in its message: that the ONLY people subject to suffering from COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease) are those whose first names are four letters long. Yes, it’s the “Breo Ellipta” medication-commercial in which a series of men and women claim: “I’m J.A.N.E. and I have C.O.P.D.” “I’m D.A.V.E. and I have C.O.P.D.” “I’m K.A.T.E. and I have C.O.P.D.” …I’m so lucky to have a name that isn’t four letters long! :dubious: https://www.youtube.com/embed/4dJV8nzzzMo?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/494 "2014-07-10T18:16:31Z")
Since the World Cup started I’ve often seen [this McDonald’s FIFA ad featuring a guy in a street basketball game head-butting a basketball](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3cScSDKa9M) and each time it makes me cringe and say, “Ow!” Because there have been a number of recommendations to restrict head-butting the ball in soccer because of the danger of concussions and brain damage, having your company air an ad where someone head-butts a bigger and heavier object seems rather ill-timed to say the least. Also, as anyone who’s been on the receiving end of a badly-aimed pass can tell you, getting hit on the head with a basketball _hurts_ and that ad just reminds me of that fact. I’m just glad McDonald’s didn’t try to do a similar commercial set at a baseball game. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/495 "2014-07-10T18:20:40Z")
> [@NDP](#): > > I’m just glad McDonald’s didn’t try to do a similar commercial set at a baseball game. Starring Jose Canseco. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/496 "2014-07-11T00:52:28Z")
I don’t even remember what this commercial is for. It’s a group of business women, I think dressed in beige, and another woman is off to the side, selling them on something. And at the end, the woman in the middle crosses her arms, and doesn’t do it right. I’v never seen anyone cross their arms like that. I just want to slap her. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2014, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/497 "2014-07-12T15:01:31Z")
The ‘10 year anniversary party’ eHarmony commercial, with the way too happy couple going at it, prone on a sofa in the next room. Like, join eHarmony, and you, too, will be bangin’ your spouse like a screen door in a hurricane after 10 long years. And the equally happy horde of guests observing, and that horrible creepy old man who owns/plugs the company! :o ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2014, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/498 "2014-07-12T18:54:43Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > I don’t even remember what this commercial is for. It’s a group of business women, I think dressed in beige, and another woman is off to the side, selling them on something. And at the end, the woman in the middle crosses her arms, and doesn’t do it right. I’v never seen anyone cross their arms like that. I just want to slap her. It’s probably the AT&T commercial with the group of women and one man who appear to be a Century 21-type of company (what with the matching blazers and Can Do Attitude). The joke is that the women all have the Can Do Attitude down, with simultaneous fixed smiles and crossed arms, but the man is playing catch-up. (An obvious appeal to female customers/business decision-makers.) I’d guess that the awkward crossed-arms of the woman in front might have been an accident of many takes (in which the reaction of the male member of the team was the most important element, so the makers of the commercial weren’t paying as much attention to what the women were doing). ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2014, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/499 "2014-07-13T22:43:05Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > The ‘10 year anniversary party’ eHarmony commercial, with the way too happy couple going at it, prone on a sofa in the next room. Like, join eHarmony, and you, too, will be bangin’ your spouse like a screen door in a hurricane after 10 long years. And the equally happy horde of guests observing, and that horrible creepy old man who owns/plugs the company! :o Had to look [that one](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5-XwswH6_4) up. They’re not actually banging when the people come in, but they do keep making out. > [@panache45](#): > > I don’t even remember what this commercial is for. It’s a group of business women, I think dressed in beige, and another woman is off to the side, selling them on something. And at the end, the woman in the middle crosses her arms, and doesn’t do it right. I’v never seen anyone cross their arms like that. I just want to slap her. Had to look [it](http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7B9p/at-and-t-professional-women) up, too, to see what you meant. She does this weird arm think to keep both her hands visible. All the others do it normally, but she’s kinda awkward. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/500 "2014-07-14T14:04:33Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > The Outback Steakhouse [commercial touting their Moonshine BBQ](http://www.youtube.com/user/OutbackSteakhouse1), “infused with the sweet taste of moonshine”. WTF? Moonshine tastes like scalding kerosene. And when did you drink THAT last? 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102.md?page=24) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102.md?page=26)