# Latest stupid commercial thread

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [July 23, 2012, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102 "2012-07-23T02:40:10Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 30

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**Author:** ![johnspartan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@johnspartan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnspartan)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2014, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/581 "2014-10-10T13:59:00Z")

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Maybe State Farm could combine “Jake” with their other trend… mistrusted hubby is on the phone with insurance agent, shrew of a wife comes downstairs to grill him…

He recites the magical State Farm transportation incarnation and he and Jake are together at 3 am, leaving his wife behind and him to enjoy khaki-coated perversity.

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**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2014, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/582 "2014-10-10T14:52:48Z")

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The latest commercials for the video game Forza: Horizon 2 has virtual footage of Lamborghinis, Corvettes, et al., which is for the most part obviously CG, yet still has the disclaimer: “Professional drivers on closed course. Do not attempt.” Huh? So I shouldn’t buy the game? Or should I just not attempt to play it unless I’m a professional driver on a closed course?

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**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2014, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/583 "2014-10-10T15:32:58Z")

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> [@DrDeth](#):
>
> Most of the posts there say to remove the front wheel.

How do you drive a Prius with only three wheels?😕 How does that help storage room?

🆒

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**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2014, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/584 "2014-10-10T16:15:23Z")

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Flo is getting a little long in the tooth…

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**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2014, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/585 "2014-10-11T09:03:07Z")

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> [@DrDeth](#):
>
> Most of the posts there say to remove the front wheel.

Post 9 shows a picture with a bike in the back with both wheels attached. That’s what I was referring to.

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**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/586 "2014-10-11T21:17:45Z")

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> [@Cuckoorex](#):
>
> The latest commercials for the video game Forza: Horizon 2 has virtual footage of Lamborghinis, Corvettes, et al., which is for the most part obviously CG, yet still has the disclaimer: “Professional drivers on closed course. Do not attempt.” Huh? So I shouldn’t buy the game? Or should I just not attempt to play it unless I’m a professional driver on a closed course?

Apparently, someone, somewhere, successfully brought suit against a company that published a snippet of film showing a car driving really fast–on the basis that plaintiff would never have driven fast if not for the inspiration provided by the snippet of film.

So the “do not attempt” has become a standard CYA disclaimer on all footage of cars driving fast.

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**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2014, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/587 "2014-10-11T21:48:16Z")

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> [@Wheelz](#):
>
> I’ve always hated portrayals of kids who act like miniature adults.

I hate this too, but I think one of the reasons for it is that professional child actors all behave like that. They learn to mimic “grownup” mannerisms and speech patterns because it gets them such a positive reaction at casting calls and they’re perceived as easier to work with. If you try to get them to act like typical kids, they seem inauthentic because they’re _not_ typical kids.

Sure, you can cast a regular, kid-type kid in your commercial, but they’re going to wander off between takes, or forget their lines, or start crying if you ask them to say a line for the fifteenth time in a row. So instead you go with the child actor whom everyone jokingly describes as “10 going on 40.”

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**Author:** ![wombattver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b77776/32.png) [@wombattver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wombattver)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2014, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/588 "2014-10-12T02:30:51Z")

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I hate, hate, hate the new Matthew McConaughey car commercials! I can’t even watch them through to the end, so I don’t know what kind of car it is, but they are so annoyingly fake and pretentious and “I’m being so understated and cool and actor-y” as if it’s this deep, moody glimpse into the guy’s soul. Ugh.

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**Author:** ![callander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@callander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/callander)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2014, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/589 "2014-10-12T14:35:57Z")

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I find these commercials odd that for various medications when listing possible side effects are so damn cheery. Y’now the ones, don’t operate heavy machinery, don’t let women and children near the med or they may start turning into werewolves, may cause suicidal thoughts.

However that creepy doll commercial from the sixties could win a prize. Voodoo witch doctor and the soooul knob and that crying at the end, I wonder about who made the commercial, then I was more disturbed by the guy/girl that approved it.

[![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/sZWL8WSAETY/hqdefault.jpg "Very Creepy Doll Commercial From The 60's") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZWL8WSAETY)

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**Author:** ![Accidental\_Martyr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ce7236/32.png) [@Accidental\_Martyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Accidental_Martyr)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2014, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/590 "2014-10-12T17:55:07Z")

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> [@callander](#):
>
> However that creepy doll commercial from the sixties could win a prize. Voodoo witch doctor and the soooul knob and that crying at the end, I wonder about who made the commercial, then I was more disturbed by the guy/girl that approved it.
> 
> [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZWL8WSAETY](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZWL8WSAETY)

Not sure if you’re being serious, but the audio for that commercial is pretty obviously fake.

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**Author:** ![callander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@callander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/callander)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2014, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/591 "2014-10-12T18:18:38Z")

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> [@Accidental\_Martyr](#):
>
> Not sure if you’re being serious, but the audio for that commercial is pretty obviously fake.

Y’know I should have known that, but i didn’t. How is that for straight up ignorance?

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**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/592 "2014-10-13T14:32:54Z")

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> [@erysichthon](#):
>
> I hate this too, but I think one of the reasons for it is that professional child actors all behave like that. They learn to mimic “grownup” mannerisms and speech patterns because it gets them such a positive reaction at casting calls and they’re perceived as easier to work with. If you try to get them to act like typical kids, they seem inauthentic because they’re _not_ typical kids.

I don’t mind a kid that can say his lines clearly and correctly, I mind when a kid is talking about buying a house as an investment property, or whining about his mortgage, or lecturing her parents about how they need to stop goofing off and focus, or whatever. That’s what I mean by acting like an adult. They’re saying things only an adult would say, having adult problems. Like whining about osteoporosis or impotence or something.

And anything with a baby talking like an adult. Babies talking about hooking up. _shudder_

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**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/593 "2014-10-13T15:13:33Z")

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> [@Sherrerd](#):
>
> Apparently, someone, somewhere, successfully brought suit against a company that published a snippet of film showing a car driving really fast–on the basis that plaintiff would never have driven fast if not for the inspiration provided by the snippet of film.
> 
> So the “do not attempt” has become a standard CYA disclaimer on all footage of cars driving fast.

and apparently, for any car driving normally as well.

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**Author:** ![Clothilde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Clothilde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothilde)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/594 "2014-10-13T15:25:06Z")

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> [@johnspartan](#):
>
> Maybe State Farm could combine “Jake” with their other trend… mistrusted hubby is on the phone with insurance agent, shrew of a wife comes downstairs to grill him…
> 
> He recites the magical State Farm transportation incarnation and he and Jake are together at 3 am, leaving his wife behind and him to enjoy khaki-coated perversity.

You, **johnspartan,** owe me a new keyboard! 😃

Note to self: Don’t read the Dope anymore while drinking coffee…

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**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/595 "2014-10-13T18:29:34Z")

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> [@simster](#):
>
> and apparently, for any car driving normally as well.

Probably.

It’s possible that there’s a disclaimer (‘Professional potato-chip bag opener; don’t try this at home’) on _every_ commercial–it just goes by too fast to be clearly seen. But if anyone should try to sue Lay’s, it would be produced in court.

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**Author:** ![planetcory](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/planetcory/32/1032_2.png) [@planetcory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/planetcory)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/596 "2014-10-13T19:04:02Z")

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> [@TGAinCMH](#):
>
> Father asks, “Will it fit my family of five?” Guy says, “Yeah, they can all fit”. We see spokesguy sitting in the middle of the back seat, arms folded casually behind his head. Hopefully we don’t notice that his elbows nearly touch the sides of the car as he does this, and that he takes up so much room that there is no chance you could fit an average-sized adult on either side of him.

To be fair, Nick Thune is like 6’6" or something. Huge guy in a tiny car.

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**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/597 "2014-10-13T19:52:33Z")

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> [@Irishman](#):
>
> I don’t mind a kid that can say his lines clearly and correctly, I mind when a kid is talking about buying a house as an investment property, or whining about his mortgage, or lecturing her parents about how they need to stop goofing off and focus, or whatever. That’s what I mean by acting like an adult. They’re saying things only an adult would say, having adult problems. Like whining about osteoporosis or impotence or something.

My post wasn’t clear on that point. I think that one of the reasons we see so many weirdly precocious, pseudo-adult kids in commercials (and sitcoms) is because the people who produce those commercials are exposed to those kinds of child actors all the time. They see these adult-like kids constantly and think they’re hilarious, so naturally they think it would be _even more hilarious_ to have commercials where the kid is literally the adult, talking about insurance or telling the parents to grow up.

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**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/598 "2014-10-13T20:55:48Z")

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> [@Sherrerd](#):
>
> Probably.
> 
> It’s possible that there’s a disclaimer (‘Professional potato-chip bag opener; don’t try this at home’) on _every_ commercial–it just goes by too fast to be clearly seen. But if anyone should try to sue Lay’s, it would be produced in court.

I just think its hilarious when its tacked to the bottom of a car commercial showing the car being driven in perfectly normal scenarios -

a) you’re telling me that it takes a proffesionally skilled driver to handle your car doing the mundane

b) if I try to take your car to its peak performance, I can expect death and destruction.

I like it when the Jeep commercials - trudging thru snow - DONT have a disclaimer.

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**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\
**Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/599 "2014-10-13T22:00:12Z")

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> [@simster](#):
>
> I just think its hilarious when its tacked to the bottom of a car commercial showing the car being driven in perfectly normal scenarios -

Yes, driving down a country road within speed limit with no traffic: disclaimer about professional driver and closed course. 😕

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**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\
**Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/latest-stupid-commercial-thread/629102/600 "2014-10-15T16:43:33Z")

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> [@Knowed\_Out](#):
>
> “My sound waves are pouring out of your speakers, touching every…”  
> “Stop disrespecting her!”  
> “Ooh, and the Dart likes it, don’t ya Dart?”  
> “GET YOUR FILTHY VOICE OFF HER, JAKE!”

Oh, god. Where’s the “ignore only the stupid part of a post” button?

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