# Leave anonymous messages for the people who visit this site immediately after you! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 26, 2002, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814 "2002-04-26T17:11:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 15
**Author:** ![x\_painless\_x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/13edae/32.png) [@x\_painless\_x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/x_painless_x)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/281 "2002-08-25T03:09:07Z")
I keep getting these stupid messages about animal cruelty. Like I know about it but pissing a billion people off about it when they wanna see some dark secrets isn’t a good way to get the message through. I suggest the person write at the beginning: While I was deciding about getting a \_\_\_ (sex change, hit man) and add that paragraph of crap and then say that changed my opinion about it. Forget \_\_\_\_, it’s time for getting implants! ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/282 "2002-08-25T13:38:11Z")
> [@](#): > > $cientology wants your money Well, that’s certainly deep 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/283 "2002-08-25T16:03:48Z")
Hey, I got a bilingual message! Sweet… 🙂 > [@](#): > > “You are the King of the divan!” qu’elle me dit en passant F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/284 "2002-08-25T17:17:56Z")
I got someone’s shopping list… > [@](#): > > hey. don’t forget to pick up that loaf of bread and a gallon of milk on your way home today. and don’t get that low-fat crap. get the real stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/285 "2002-08-25T20:28:28Z")
> [@](#): > > HEY NOW! I hope you’re licky enough not to live in Kansas. Why? I’d rather be in Kansas and licked than anywhere else and _not_ get anything at all . . . Tripler Lick me, baby. ---
**Author:** ![Landshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/77aa72/32.png) [@Landshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Landshark)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/286 "2002-08-25T20:35:11Z")
I got: > [@](#): > > Don’t be a dick, okay? Umm, ok, I’ll try. ---
**Author:** ![Anubis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@Anubis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anubis)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/288 "2002-08-25T22:04:55Z")
Ok, who’s the culprit behind this little masterpiece? > [@](#): > > FYI. Cameron Diaz’s move “The Sweetest Thing” recently released on home video is very wierd. There is like a 5 minute song and dance routine in the middle about penises. And it wasn’t even funny. In the end the movie was watchable but whomever wrote the script was definately a man. It is you, **Muffy’s Sis**? ---
**Author:** ![Anubis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@Anubis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anubis)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/289 "2002-08-25T22:09:48Z")
And I also just got this: > [@](#): > > Im a girl and once i made out with a girl but im not a lesbian…really. and this: > [@](#): > > I had my heart broken this summer by a guy named Zack. We hooked up and then he never called me. I was so depressed. Im still getting over it right now. Why are guys such ass holes? I think people use this thing as a diary or psychologist or something. ---
**Author:** ![Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bren_Cameron_1)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/290 "2002-08-25T23:48:56Z")
Hmm. > [@](#): > > Dear Cecil, You are the only man I want (well now that I’ve had a few hundred anyway). Please let me have your baby!! I was born with a penis, but for you I will find some way of getting pregnant I promise. I understand that there is a doctor here in Montreal who works miracles with stuff like that. We must be together. My heart will not take another day without you. C’mon Cecil, Please say yes, eh? All my love, Scott 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bren_Cameron_1)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2002, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/291 "2002-08-25T23:54:51Z")
Hmm. > [@](#): > > Dear Cecil, You are the only man I want (well now that I’ve had a few hundred anyway). Please let me have your baby!! I was born with a penis, but for you I will find some way of getting pregnant I promise. I understand that there is a doctor here in Montreal who works miracles with stuff like that. We must be together. My heart will not take another day without you. C’mon Cecil, Please say yes, eh? All my love, Scott 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Drudgery\_With\_Intent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Drudgery\_With\_Intent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drudgery_With_Intent)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/292 "2002-08-26T00:31:33Z")
no one understands me. i just want them to understand, but no. its not posssible ---
**Author:** ![Greywolf73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/293 "2002-08-26T05:24:08Z")
I’m addicted to this. I just got this one: You wear your breasts to their full extent, like a man with an uncontrollable bulge in his apartment. Now how do they know that? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Greywolf73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/294 "2002-08-26T05:29:24Z")
And then I got this one. (too good not to share): "My dear friend, Believe me that I was sincerely afflicted when I learned of the loss you have suffered: a steam powered urinal is not easily replaced. Yours, which had among other peculiarities, the ability to sing the Marseillaise when in use, was certainly worthy of the esteem you bestowed upon it. So, it is easy for me to understand the despair that your sister felt when it became evident that the urinal was definitely lost. Nevertheless, from that to suicide is quite a step! And, although I know that many fond memories were associated with its possession, I cannot but sondem such a fatal resolve. But this censure does not prevent me from profoundly deploring her sad end. A suicide is always, for those close to the deceased, a tragic and agonising event; but when it is accomplished by the means of jam, one cannot be less than terrified. Never would I have believed that your sister could resolve to die embedded in a vat of jam! And yet, all those unlucky enough to befriend her knew of her most morbid attraction to jam, even in jars. Do you remember how she could not contain herself when she saw it with desserts, how she had to caress it before even serving herself? Numerous incidents of this nature should have aroused our suspicions; but, blind that we were, we never understood their profound significance. Nonetheless, I shiver at the thought of how her last moments must have been. Please believe me that I share your pain and approve of your descision to banish jam from your life. This is a healthy reaction and I can only commend it from the bottom of my heart. It demonstrates both your determination, and your courage in overcoming pain as well as your instinct for self-preservation. I am truly glad, that without jam, you do not, indeed, risk letting yourself be compelled to follow the example of your sister. " ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/295 "2002-08-26T06:41:16Z")
What I gave: > [@](#): > > Self-defense is the ultimate basis of individual rights and civil liberties. The right to speak is futile if you have no right to live. What I got: > [@](#): > > Did you know that “en” is a word? I post a political manifesto and get a piece of probably wrong trivia. Random chance must be a funny motherfucker. ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/296 "2002-08-26T06:57:16Z")
I got… > [@](#): > > Flamsterette\_X with real bacon bits. Now available in your grocer’s freezer. E3 ---
**Author:** ![Drudgery\_With\_Intent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Drudgery\_With\_Intent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drudgery_With_Intent)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/297 "2002-08-26T07:09:22Z")
> [@](#): > > All brave communists doing everything feasible grant hefty incentives, judge keepers losers, make no opinions personal, quote references superlatively, though understand various weird xylophones yearn zealously. Hmm… ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/298 "2002-08-26T07:24:55Z")
> [@](#): > > Did you know that McDonalds soft serve icecream is made of pigfat. Mmmmm… you can taste the piggly goodness. Hm, so that’s why my kid sister likes McD’s ice cream? ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/299 "2002-08-26T07:43:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Greywolf73 \* > \*\*I’m addicted to this. > > I just got this one: > > You wear your breasts to their full extent, like a man with an uncontrollable bulge in his apartment. > Now how do they know that? 😉 \*\* Hey, whoever left that one must have followed the advice I gave way back in this thread about using [this site](http://www.madsci.org/cgi-bin/cgiwrap/~lynn/jardin/SCG) as a source of material. Good on ya, whoever that was 😃 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Enright3 \* > \*\*I got… > > > [@](#): > > > > Flamsterette\_X with real bacon bits. Now available in your grocer’s freezer. > > E3\*\* Hey! I’d like to know who left that one. Seriously. I haven’t eaten bacon bits in months, and I’d like to take objection to being characterized as a foodstuff, thank you very much. As for being available in your grocer’s freezer, nah. That would be WAY too cold an environment for me to be in. Brrrrr… I left: > [@](#): > > Well, it appears that my shots into the ether have all been for naught. He’s not responding. Which is par for the course, I guess. I’d love a dose of humor right now, though. Talked to my brother, which is not the same. Humor, please come to me. … and got this in return: > [@](#): > > I spilled spot remover on my dog… Now he’s gone! Har har har. F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/300 "2002-08-26T14:28:30Z")
Be careful of what you wish for, you just might get it… 😉 Oh wow. This person, too. > [@](#): > > I keep coming here hoping that the next message i get will contain some wisdom, maybe im lloking in the wrong place… ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2002, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814/301 "2002-08-26T19:16:20Z")
This is what I left: (yes, it’s a collection of impressions… sue me :p) > [@](#): > > Yeah, I stayed up well past my bedtime talking to Spoz, but so what? It was a great conversation! Talked about music, emoticons, what I was doing, octets, etc. Love the humor, man! Dude! > > I think that jackelope and I may be on the outs… hope I’ve not hurt him inadvertently! Should stop leaving him offline messages, emails, and stuff like that. I’m not going to bug him. Okay, we’re probably not on the outs… maybe I am getting like Mom and getting overly paranoid and worried. Yikes. But I’ll just wait and see. > > ResIpsaLoquitor thinks “Carmelina Nina Molly Fraser” sounds pretentious. (Spoz said it sounded princessy; I’m more inclinded to believe him, hahaha) I think “New Window Pop-Up Syndrome” sounds weird enough for me… but I gotta change it. Definitely won’t bug him much now he’s in school, too. Could be lonely in Michigan, but I’ll let him start it off… unless there’s something really pressing. (knowing me, that’s every day… gotta cut down on it) As long as he’s not bugged by my emails, then it’ll all be good. > > What can I say… TalkingHead’s MSN name was just a bit much for my brother and sister. I expressed shock at his name, of course. Too bad they weren’t around to see it, though. > > BBQ tonight at Daniel’s! Woohoo! Gotta get ready for it sooner rather than later! Yahoo! (yes, I’m super-excited, can’t you tell? hehehehe) In return, I got this: > [@](#): > > Amazing that of all the millions of people that do this stupid thing YOU would have the privlege of reading MY message Riiiiiiiiiiiight… and what makes YOU so important? You’re just hoity-toity, I do believe. Besides, you don’t even know how to spell “privilege” correctly… sheesh. F\_X [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814.md?page=14) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/leave-anonymous-messages-for-the-people-who-visit-this-site-immediately-after-you/105814.md?page=16)