# Lesbian must pay ex-partner child support **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [July 19, 2002, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833 "2002-07-19T16:45:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2002, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/1 "2002-07-19T16:45:16Z")
Source: [The Advocate](http://www.advocate.com/new_news.asp?ID=5038&sd=07/19/02) > [@](#): > > A lesbian must pay child support to her former partner even though she was neither related to nor the adoptive parent of the child, a Massachusetts judge has ruled. The ruling represents the first time a Massachusetts judge has ordered a same-sex partner to pay child support, according to Massachusetts Lawyers Weekly. > > [snip] > > “If the plaintiff wishes to have basically all of the rights of joint legal custody and be considered as a de facto parent, then she also needs to accept the financial responsibility,” [Middlesex family court judge Spencer M.] Kagan wrote in the April decision, which was recently made public. I agree totally with the decision by Kagan. With all the rights, come all the responsibilities. I see this decision as a step forward in the struggle for equal rights. What say the Dopers? ---
**Author:** ![booklover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@booklover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/booklover)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2002, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/2 "2002-07-19T16:51:24Z")
I agree as well. If we are going to fight for equal rights as gays, we need to accept the responsibilities as well as the privileges. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2002, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/3 "2002-07-19T17:25:36Z")
If she wants visitation, obviously she considers the kid her own, even if she didn’t adopt it. Good for the judge. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/4 "2002-07-20T02:17:47Z")
Good for the judge. Sounds like the woman was trying to be a weasel, and the judge wasn’t going for it. ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/5 "2002-07-20T02:26:21Z")
Child support is statutory, and I have no idea what the Massachusetts statute says. But a general principle of presumed parenthood is that if you’re in a relationship with the biological mother and you accept the child as your own, you’re the parent. This decision is consisten with that principle, and I think it’s an excellent call as a matter of policy. (Substitute “father” for “parent” and you have the actual principle, but I prefer gender-neutrality.) ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/6 "2002-07-20T05:06:33Z")
This isn’t exactly a ground breaking case is it? I’ve read about at least one lesbian who sued successfully for visitation rights after she and her partner split. Marc ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/7 "2002-07-20T05:53:07Z")
I agree with the ruling. I think it gives hope to recognition through setting a precedent. ---
**Author:** ![QueenAl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/d26b3c/32.png) [@QueenAl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QueenAl)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/8 "2002-07-20T21:11:45Z")
Yup, agreed, the ruling is fair. At least, from what I know of this particular case it’s fair, and the general principle is sound. ---
**Author:** ![Tsubaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/9 "2002-07-20T23:44:04Z")
Cool. ---
**Author:** ![Tsubaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2002, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/10 "2002-07-20T23:52:02Z")
Cool. ---
**Author:** ![Tsubaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2002, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/11 "2002-07-21T00:00:08Z")
Cool. ---
**Author:** ![Tsubaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2002, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/12 "2002-07-21T00:12:19Z")
Cool. ---
**Author:** ![Tsubaki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@Tsubaki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tsubaki)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2002, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/13 "2002-07-21T00:13:52Z")
Oh my god. I’m really sorry. Bloody computer. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2002, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbian-must-pay-ex-partner-child-support/119833/14 "2002-07-21T00:52:26Z")
I’m very happy about this. 🙂 I just hope it’s one step closer to legalising same-sex marriages. I think it’s a brilliant move, take on all the responsibility, and how can fair-minded people not give the privileges, too. We just need more fair-minded people in charge 🙂