# Lesbians, Nuns, Europeans: Is there significance to a "wedding band" on the right ring finger? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [April 3, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096 "2016-04-03T17:19:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/1 "2016-04-03T17:19:32Z")
The query is both addressed to lesbians, n’s, and E’s as a group or combinatorial, as well as being about them. I have heard/read and claimed in the first words I ever said to my wife when I met her in synagogue (TMI?–too late!): 1. Lesbians sometimes wear them (or wore them back in the day) as a sign of commitment “equivalent” to marriage. 2. Heterosexual European women wear them as the normal way to wear a wedding ring. 3. Nuns wear them as a sign that they are, in their words, brides of Christ. After having believed this and told the how-we-met story for decades, I met some resistance to the claim that these statements were, you know, true (specifically, a conversation this morning with a lesbian from back in the day). I have listed them order of doubt/wishing to be corrected or confirmed. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2016, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/2 "2016-04-03T17:32:49Z")
I don’t know where I picked up this idea but I had the impression that it was predominantly something that Catholic men do (in the Netherlands and Germany, at least), but I may be wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2016, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/3 "2016-04-03T20:37:39Z")
Which hand is normally used varies by location. Exceptions tend to be linked to personal preference and not any kind of code. Nuns do wear wedding bands. My parents were from two different regions in Spain, she expected the bands on the right, he on the left. She always wore hers on the right, he on the left. One of his brothers has always worn it on the right because he’s an extreme lefty and it bothers him to have it on the left (he wears his wristwatch on the right too). For their first anniversary of being “official”, my brother bought a pair of silver bands. Him and his then-gf wore them in the same fingers as they’d wear the wedding bands for which they traded them in the wedding (left hand for both, by regional preferences). I’m shorter on married lesbians than married gays and I’ll admit I haven’t asked either, but I expect they’ll wear them exactly like anybody else. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2016, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/4 "2016-04-03T21:52:15Z")
As **Nava** said, nuns do often wear wedding bands or other rings of their order. For example, the Benedictine ring: > **[A Prayer for the Pray-ers](http://shmstudent.blogspot.com/2010/10/prayer-for-pray-ers.html)** > > Greetings, The community ring is my symbol of perpetual profession, the commitment of my life to our Benedictine community. The ring has onl... ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2016, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/5 "2016-04-03T22:27:07Z")
In the past, some gay men and lesbians wore bands on their right hands to signify commitment. Now that we can legally marry, I think most (including my husband and me) wear them on the left hand. ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/6 "2016-04-04T07:46:23Z")
> [@Leo\_Bloom](#): > > 1. Lesbians sometimes wear them (or wore them back in the day) as a sign of commitment “equivalent” to marriage. This may be something which used to happen - I will defer to Patrick’s greater years on this one. But we can marry just like everyone else nowadays, I’m getting married in June and will wear my ring on my left lesbian hand. > [@Leo\_Bloom](#): > > 1. Heterosexual European women wear them as the normal way to wear a wedding ring. Another of my many gripes about lumping ‘Europeans’ together. In the UK, we wear wedding bands on the left hand. I have no idea what they do in different regions of Spain, Poland or Albania. > [@Leo\_Bloom](#): > > 1. Nuns wear them as a sign that they are, in their words, brides of Christ. Now this sounds like it may be a thing! ---
**Author:** ![Mops](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mops/32/16494_2.png) [@Mops](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mops)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/7 "2016-04-04T09:19:54Z")
The majority custom here in Germany seems to be to wear engagement rings on the left hand, wedding rings on the right hand. Some people buy engagement rings suitable as a wedding ring and at the wedding just change them to the right hand. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/8 "2016-04-04T09:33:17Z")
> [@SanVito](#): > > But we can marry just like everyone else nowadays, I’m getting married in June and will wear my ring on my left lesbian hand. Maybe it’s not. Has your hand ever tried not being lesbian? Maybe it’s just experimenting. Or seeking attention. 😃 I kid, I kid. It’s just an interesting phrase, as though the right hand might be hetero or bi and the elbow might be not dating at all. Congrats on your upcoming nuptials. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/9 "2016-04-04T13:13:28Z")
Well, Bricker, I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith… ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/10 "2016-04-04T14:10:46Z")
You can read [here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ring_finger) for which cultures do left hand, and which do right. I know Hungary also follows the custom mentioned by **Mops** , in which the engagement ring is worn on the left hand, wedding band on right hand (although sometimes they will have been the same ring, just moved from left hand to the right hand in the ceremony, although that is a bit of an older custom to use the same ring.) ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/11 "2016-04-04T14:42:54Z")
Nuns also vary in the placement of the “wedding” ring they receive during the ceremony of their profession: depending on the religious order they’re in, it can be on the right hand or the left. What’s puzzling me now is the even more trivial question of why the OP bothered to abbreviate “nuns” to “n’s”, for a typographical savings of one whole character. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/12 "2016-04-04T17:24:29Z")
The same reason I enjoy reading about Bertie Wooster describing pushing a moody forkful of eggs and bacon washed down with coffee, and, when continuing his narrative, reminds us of the fraught moment of the eggs, b. and coffee. More interesting, since you mention language, is the order of the nouns. Friends, Romans, Countrymen Lesby’ns, Nuns, Europe’ns ETA-“_more_ trivial”?! ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/13 "2016-04-04T21:02:48Z")
Heterosexual 'merkin here. I wear my weeding ring on my right ring finger because it is physically uncomfortable to wear it on the left. My wife and I agreed before the wedding that it ain’t the position, it’s the intention. Interestingly, it is rare that anybody asks why. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/14 "2016-04-04T21:14:53Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > Heterosexual 'merkin here. I wear my weeding ring on my right ring finger because it is physically uncomfortable to wear it on the left. My wife and I agreed before the wedding that it ain’t the position, it’s the intention. Interestingly, it is rare that anybody asks why. They may not ask, because they assume you’re a nun. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/15 "2016-04-04T21:18:26Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > What’s puzzling me now is the even more trivial question of why the OP bothered to abbreviate “nuns” to “n’s”, for a typographical savings of one whole character. :dubious: I know - it was total nunsense. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2016, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/16 "2016-04-04T22:24:48Z")
A heterosexual merkin? I didn’t think it mattered. ---
**Author:** ![Grither](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grither/32/425_2.png) [@Grither](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grither)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2016, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/17 "2016-04-05T06:10:47Z")
> [@cmkeller](#): > > Well, Bricker, I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith… Okay, I’ll bite… What’s the other leg named? ---
**Author:** ![Jesta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Jesta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesta)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2016, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/18 "2016-04-05T11:28:25Z")
> [@Grither](#): > > Okay, I’ll bite… What’s the other leg named? I’ll just Poppin here and say that I don’t think Mr Smith actually named either of his legs. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![yo\_han\_go](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yo_han_go/32/130_2.png) [@yo\_han\_go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yo_han_go)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2016, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/19 "2016-04-05T12:14:31Z")
Well, when I saw this topic I just grabbed a popcorn and started reading. I expected some European lesbian nun would answer, but alas, not happening. Still, haven’t been disappointed. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2016, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096/20 "2016-04-05T12:58:26Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > They may not ask, because they assume you’re a nun. 😉 It’s a hard habit to break. > [@Leo\_Bloom](#): > > A heterosexual merkin? I didn’t think it mattered. Of course it does - homosexual merkins are MUCH more stylish. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lesbians-nuns-europeans-is-there-significance-to-a-wedding-band-on-the-right-ring-finger/751096.md?page=2)