# Let me tell ya about the beer stein and the thousand mile trip. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 25, 2014, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565 "2014-09-25T21:44:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/1 "2014-09-25T21:44:35Z")
I ordered a beer stein. All the way from Germany. The package arrived and to my delight, it was all in one piece! So I sat the stein on the kitchen counter and turned around for two seconds to throw away the packaging. As soon as I did, I hear a crash! The fucking cat knocked the stein off the counter and now I have a useless beer stein in pieces all over the floor! Cats are dicks. That is all. ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/2 "2014-09-25T22:00:19Z")
Don’t worry: some Doper will be along shortly to tell you the best glue to use to put Humpty-Dumpty back together again!!! ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/3 "2014-09-25T22:51:46Z")
it didn’t even get head. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/4 "2014-09-25T23:07:51Z")
My wife has, on two different occasions, bought china teacups at a thrift store, and dropped them getting out of the car in the parking lot when she got home. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/5 "2014-09-25T23:18:12Z")
Sorry, I shouldn’t have laughed. ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/6 "2014-09-25T23:34:59Z")
Yet more evidence that cats suck. Man, I’m sorry, I would have been livid. It is just a little bit funny though, only because it happened to someone else. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/7 "2014-09-26T01:16:34Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > Don’t worry: some Doper will be along shortly to tell you the best glue to use to put Humpty-Dumpty back together again!!! I’m waiting for this…I have a favorite mug that has a broken handle. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/8 "2014-09-26T01:28:45Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > Don’t worry: some Doper will be along shortly to tell you the best glue to use to put Humpty-Dumpty back together again!!! I’m sure you can make some good glue out of boiled cat bones. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/9 "2014-09-26T01:56:50Z")
The cat is trying to tell you that you drink too much. Heed its advice. ---
**Author:** ![Sodalite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@Sodalite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sodalite)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/10 "2014-09-26T06:19:53Z")
(warning, language may be NSFW on some images) Yeah, [this is a thing](http://adorepics.com/please-do-not-leave-drinks-unattended/) [you should know,](http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/04/11/cat-knocks-things-over-funny-video_n_3061312.html) [since you live with one already,](http://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/MjAxMy00NTFhODFkZWVjNGQyMmFh) [but cats are assholes.](http://www.dogshaming.com/2014/09/i-dont-need-saving/) 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/11 "2014-09-26T08:17:20Z")
Cats can be useful. And [tasty](http://www.ooze.com/ooze13/cats.html). ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/12 "2014-09-26T15:27:21Z")
Should have bought two. One for you, and one for the cat. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/13 "2014-09-26T15:34:13Z")
Email the company, explain what happened, and see if they would be willing to trade the cat for a replacement stein. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/14 "2014-09-26T16:16:43Z")
[Cats are just dicks.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3GJycgu-cs) ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/15 "2014-09-26T20:24:39Z")
Cat was pissed because you threw away the packaging. You should have surrendered the box. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2014, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-me-tell-ya-about-the-beer-stein-and-the-thousand-mile-trip/699565/16 "2014-09-26T21:52:27Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Cat was pissed because you threw away the packaging. You should have surrendered the box. That’s good theory. Packaging, above almost anything else\*, is the rightful property of the cat. And cats know it. And, as you must certainly understand, defend their prerogatives energetically. The other theory is that the cat did it in pre-emptive self-defense, because **Shakes** is a mean drunk and the cat just doesn’t want to put up with it. But I don’t favor that theory. It assumes facts not in evidence, and the “you threw away MY package” theory is both sufficient and fully supported by the known facts. Occam’s Razor and all that. \*The only things higher in priority in the “rightfully the cat’s” list is canned seafood and catnip. And any pillow.