# Let the holiday mini rants begin **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 22, 2009, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501 "2009-11-22T05:08:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2009, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/301 "2009-12-15T21:34:08Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I’m about to throw [Luci and Annie](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v220/Guinastasia/Kitties/luciannie34.jpg) out on their butts if they don’t leave the tree alone!!! Especially Annie (the white one). I think I’m going to go over and sabotage **Guinastasia** ’s tree. Then she’ll throw the cats out, and I can take them home. They’re pretty kitties! Is Annie a flame point Siamese? I love meezers. My Luna is a Siamese mix. ---
**Author:** ![fusoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecccb3/32.png) [@fusoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fusoya)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/302 "2009-12-15T21:51:02Z")
God-fucking-shit, USPS. When you have a line that is literally out the door and around the corner, shouldn’t you take that as a hint to hire more than 2 tellers? It’s been like that at my local post office for the last 8 years, and it’s impossible to mail anything in the month of December, especially since they added that goddamn 13 oz law. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2009, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/303 "2009-12-16T01:09:00Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > Yep. So… > > Dear Unknown Neighbors, > you have lovely cats. They’re nice and friendly. How do I know how friendly your cats are? Well, come just after Christmas every year, the little fuzzies begin to roam the neighborhood looking for food and a place to curl up out of the wind and snow for the night - they’ve taken up our offer of spending the night in an old insulated dog house more than once. I’m not positive, but my strong suspicion, given that this happens year after year, is that you go somewhere warm for the winter…and throw the cats outside to fend for themselves all winter. > > What the fuck is wrong with you?? > > I’ll be buying another bag of dry catfood soon, because I just know you’re going to do it again. If you are interested in adopting them, I suggest checking local animal control laws. It may be that you can turn them in as abandoned/loose pets, pay an adoption fee, and they will be legally yours. Also possible that if the neighbor complains to the authorities, they will be whacked with a fine for letting their animals run loose. (A friend of mine tried to help a deadbeat acquaintance when the woman’s dogs got picked up. Friend paid the fees and got the dogs, woman failed to pay her back as she’d promised . . . my friend has a new dog!) ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2009, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/304 "2009-12-16T01:40:53Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > No iPhone, unfortunately. > > I thought those were potholes. My bad - I should have been more specific - the _cars_ are full of assholes. 🙂 > [@](#): > > Me neither. I am not Mrs MrNeville’sfirstname Neville, dammit, and it annoys me to no end when people address stuff like that! When I’m in certain moods, I will refuse to open mail addressed that way, as it does not have my name on it. > > I refused to address any of our wedding invitations that way. Miss Manners can kiss my ass if she has a problem with that. I almost never see Mrs. Jim Lastname, which is fine by me. I gladly took my husband’s last name when we married, but I didn’t sign on for being a subsidiary of his identity. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2009, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/305 "2009-12-16T01:54:41Z")
OK, here’s one more. (Whoever said April was the cruelest month lied. It’s December, hands down!) If you’re going to invite me to a holiday dinner by e-mail, please make sure the date and time in the e-mail are for the event you’re inviting me to, not for something else. I’m home alone because the party the e-mail said was tomorrow night was really tonight. Not that I mind being home alone, because I’m exhausted and I feel lousy, but I feel shitty for bailing like this, even if it’s their fault for not confirming the date. ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2009, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/306 "2009-12-16T02:15:35Z")
> [@StarvingButStrong](#): > > Requiring students to sing praises to a “Lord” is iffy, even if you might be able to argue that the “Lord” in question might possibly be Allah or Brahma or, indeed, the Invisible Pink Unicorn. This brings back memories of being in grade school choir in the mid-1970’s. We had started learning some piece of Christian music (probably something appropriate for Christmas, I just don’t remember). Someone must have complained to the instructor, because she announced that we were going to replace “Lord” with “Sir” in that piece. I can still hear her telling us to sing, “We praise Thee _Sir_,” empahsis on the _Sir_. Now I have images of 3rd-grade D/s choir. Great. > [@fusoya](#): > > especially since they added that goddamn 13 oz law. I confess to throwing anything that fits into the drop box. It doesn’t seem to delay delivery, and no one’s come after me yet. Who the fuck came up with 13 ounces as a limit, anyway? ---
**Author:** ![Any\_Other\_Name](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f17d59/32.png) [@Any\_Other\_Name](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Any_Other_Name)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2009, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/307 "2009-12-16T23:18:58Z")
> [@Proudest\_Monkey](#): > > I am increasingly annoyed at commercials which hijack the few Christmas songs I like in order to sell a product. > > I’m looking at you, Garmin, for turning the **Carol of the Bells** into “Give a, give a, give a, give a Garmin.” Pissed me off so much that I bought a, bought a, bought a, bought a TomTom instead. Each year NBC in New York used to have all their newscasters (and others?) singing a particular holiday song, in front of the tree at Rockefeller Center. I heard the same song this year and looked up at the TV to see … a Walmart commercial! I was SO pissed! ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/308 "2009-12-17T18:25:43Z")
I sent a package of Xmas food treats to my sister and asshole of a brother-in-law. I get back an e-mail from my sister thanking me, and reminding me that I must treat the both of them equally. Various unworthy reply options come to mind, including making it clear to my sister that her husband is **not** allowed to eat any of the holiday treats. Temptation is a terrible thing. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/309 "2009-12-17T18:30:27Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > I get back an e-mail from my sister thanking me, and reminding me that I must treat the both of them equally. She thanked you… by lecturing you? About a gift? I hope to hell you resolve to “treat them equally” by giving them both nothing from here on out. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/310 "2009-12-17T20:35:19Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > She thanked you… by lecturing you? About a gift? > > I hope to hell you resolve to “treat them equally” by giving them both nothing from here on out. Seriously! You could have sent them a box of _toenail clippings_ and the _very_ least you should have gotten was some vaguely worded expression of gratitude like “Thank you so much for thinking of us in this joyous season! Merry Christmas!” You simply _do not_ harsh on the mellow of Christmas (or other) gifts! (Of course, all involved would have been aware that the toenail clippings were _only_ for the asshole BIL! 😛 ) ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/311 "2009-12-17T20:43:53Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > I sent a package of Xmas food treats to my sister and asshole of a brother-in-law. > > I get back an e-mail from my sister thanking me, and reminding me that I must treat the both of them equally. > > Various unworthy reply options come to mind, including making it clear to my sister that her husband is **not** allowed to eat any of the holiday treats. > > Temptation is a terrible thing. I don’t understand this - you sent it to both of them, and she still told you that you have to send it to both of them? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/312 "2009-12-17T20:45:04Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > I don’t understand this - you sent it to both of them, and she still told you that you have to send it to both of them? My interpretation was that she was demanding a second, equally-sized portion so that there would be separate gifts for each. 😕 I could be wrong, though. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/313 "2009-12-17T20:46:19Z")
Yeah, I think I would have responded, “I did treat you equally. You’re each supposed to get half, dumbass.” ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/314 "2009-12-17T21:00:10Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > Does ANYBODY actually _like_ going to staff Christmas parties for their spouse? The boyfriend and I both have our Christmas parties on the same night - this Friday. I went to his party last year, and had somewhat of a good time. This time, though, I feel a little anxious because I can never remember all of the names of his co-workers, and when I joked with him that I’d appreciate a primer of sorts, he just told me that I really only need to remember the names of three. He also wants me to be the DD for the party. I feel like, since I’m gonna be the one who will be somewhat uncomfortable, I should at least be able to enjoy the open arms of an open bar. My office’s party is 45 miles away, and I’m relatively new to the firm - been working there for three months. Since I telecommute often (very encouraged with our firm), I figured I’d just skip the party. It’d be a good way to mix and mingle, but since there’s a third party that night (one that we’ve RSVPed to), it seems like more time would be spent in a car than getting to enjoy people’s company. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/315 "2009-12-17T21:07:40Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > My interpretation was that she was demanding a second, equally-sized portion so that there would be separate gifts for each. 😕 I could be wrong, though. Oh, if that was it, no wonder I didn’t understand such as assheaded thing. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/316 "2009-12-17T21:25:16Z")
> [@Calatin](#): > > My office’s party is 45 miles away, and I’m relatively new to the firm - been working there for three months. Since I telecommute often (very encouraged with our firm), I figured I’d just skip the party. It’d be a good way to mix and mingle There’s a party at my office tomorrow, too. I wish I didn’t have to go to it, either. Mixing and mingling is something I do pretty much only when I have to. I’d rather be at home with a good book, snuggled up next to a cat. It’s my way. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/317 "2009-12-17T21:34:58Z")
Fucking fuck fuck! Suck my balls of holly. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/318 "2009-12-17T21:41:43Z")
> [@Calatin](#): > > He also wants me to be the DD for the party. You’re doing him the favor of attending the party. He should do you the favor of being the DD, \*or \*you should spring for some combination of a cab and public transportation. You can tell him that comes straight from Random Woman on the Internet Who’s Always Right, God Dammit. > [@Zebra](#): > > Suck my balls of holly. If your testicles are green, spiky, and poisonous, you should probably have them looked at. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/319 "2009-12-17T21:46:14Z")
My son wants an airsoft gun (cuz nothing says Happy Birthday Baby Jesus like a modern bb gun). He wants a high FPS (Feet per Second). There are flippin’ hundreds of choices, options, etc. I have no time to research all of these, no idea what the hell I am doing, and no knowledge (real guns - easy, toys - pain the ass). Grr - I might just have to do the old “lets go shopping together” schtick. ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2009, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501/320 "2009-12-17T21:50:43Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > There’s a party at my office tomorrow, too. I wish I didn’t have to go to it, either. Mixing and mingling is something I do pretty much only when I have to. I’d rather be at home with a good book, snuggled up next to a cat. It’s my way. Honestly, if it wasn’t for the fact that I’d be spending 2 hours in the car, and probably only one hour at the party itself (since I’d need to make appearances at the other two parties), I’d be more inclined to go. Most interactions I’ve had with my co-workers have been pleasant. It’s just so damn far. > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > You can tell him that comes straight from Random Woman on the Internet Who’s Always Right, God Dammit. Cite? 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501.md?page=15) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/let-the-holiday-mini-rants-begin/518501.md?page=17)