# Let's all think of the shittiest sitcom idea we can pitch FOX **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 29, 2010, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691 "2010-04-29T00:52:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/21 "2010-04-29T03:10:51Z")
**Me and the Beavers** Owing to various unlikely circumstances (possibly involving a will, a deceased sea captain and a 108-year-old lady), a ne’er-do-well young white man aged between 18 and 22 is awarded custody of seven teenage black girls (minimum age 14, maximum 17) whom he has to raise, acting as guide, mentor and father figure. In less time than you’d think\*, all seven girls actually have their eyes set on him – but he, being the naive kind, never notices. As an extra gag, the guy has a pair of pet beavers which he keeps in the bathtub. We never actually see the beavers, but we sometimes hear them slapping their tails on the water when someone says an especially funny line. - Astonishingly. ---
**Author:** ![robgotabingbang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@robgotabingbang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgotabingbang)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/22 "2010-04-29T04:09:18Z")
Reality Show: Twenty single women, ten men, only 4 condoms. Who will be America’s Next Single Mom? ---
**Author:** ![robgotabingbang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@robgotabingbang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgotabingbang)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/23 "2010-04-29T04:14:36Z")
"Me and the Beavers Owing to various unlikely circumstances (possibly involving a will, a deceased sea captain and a 108-year-old lady), a ne’er-do-well young white man aged between 18 and 22 is awarded custody of seven teenage black girls (minimum age 14, maximum 17) whom he has to raise, acting as guide, mentor and father figure. In less time than you’d think\*, all seven girls actually have their eyes set on him – but he, being the naive kind, never notices. As an extra gag, the guy has a pair of pet beavers which he keeps in the bathtub. We never actually see the beavers, but we sometimes hear them slapping their tails on the water when someone says an especially funny line." The parallels between the seven black girls and the beavers is duly noted and is fertile soil for hilarity. You sir, will be my head writer. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/24 "2010-04-29T04:26:16Z")
> [@MacSpon](#): > > **Me and the Beavers** > > Owing to various unlikely circumstances (possibly involving a will, a deceased sea captain and a 108-year-old lady), a ne’er-do-well young white man aged between 18 and 22 is awarded custody of seven teenage black girls (minimum age 14, maximum 17) whom he has to raise, acting as guide, mentor and father figure. In less time than you’d think\*, all seven girls actually have their eyes set on him – but he, being the naive kind, never notices. > > - Astonishingly. Hmmm… maybe if you change ‘have their eyes set on him’ to ‘have their eyes cut out by him’ - because he’s a serial killer! Hilarity and wacky hi-jinks ensue as he tries to keep the cops from finding the bodies! What? Why is everyone looking at me like that? ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/25 "2010-04-29T04:39:05Z")
> [@robgotabingbang](#): > > “Me and the Beavers” > > The parallels between the seven black girls and the beavers is duly noted and is fertile soil for hilarity. You sir, will be my head writer. The really sad part is that now I have plot-lines running through my head. (Somebody shoot me! Now!) The first episode probably has our hero going in to the local courthouse to pay a parking ticket; but he accidentally walks in on a custody hearing instead and, in a burst of legal confusion, is awarded legal guardianship of the seven girls. After a few hi-jinks, they’re about to blow the whistle on the mistake, but then they find out that the place they were supposed to be going is a real hell-hole. However, the guy and his beavers save the day somehow, so the girls decide to stick to him. Er, stick with him. There. Nice and original. ---
**Author:** ![robgotabingbang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@robgotabingbang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgotabingbang)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/26 "2010-04-29T04:40:00Z")
Can we have them get pregnant by him and THEN he cuts their eyes out? I wanna make a statement about teenage pregnancy while concomitantly exploring the morality of serial killing. All in good fun of course. After all, this is FOX, home of the ZANIEST entertainment going! ---
**Author:** ![robgotabingbang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@robgotabingbang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgotabingbang)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/27 "2010-04-29T04:41:21Z")
HOT ISSUES! Great stuff, you guys. We’re gonna roll in it! ---
**Author:** ![Jim\_s\_Son](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19adc/32.png) [@Jim\_s\_Son](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jim_s_Son)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/28 "2010-04-29T05:35:18Z")
No need. Josh Whedon already did this with “Firefly”. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/29 "2010-04-29T13:59:28Z")
**PRO-CHOICE vs. PRO-LIFE** Start with 20 three months pregnant women. Have ten of them abort. showing the whole process. Have the other ten carry to term, give birth and give the baby up for adoption, showing the whole process. A year later, talk to each group and see who is happier with their decision. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/30 "2010-04-29T14:14:19Z")
[Monkey Tennis](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEwZ-1s9-SU)! ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/31 "2010-04-29T14:19:39Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > **Are You My Daddy?** > > Thirteen-year-old Becca has always wished that her mom would tell her who her father was, but Becca was conceived during her mom’s last lost weekend, so she couldn’t tell her, even if she wanted to. > > When Mom is out with the latest in a series of boyfriends who highlight her questionable taste, Becca rummages through Mom’s stuff and finds a photograph: it’s dated roughly nine and a half months before Becca’s birth, and shows her mom and ten men, but only lists their first names and last initials. Since Becca is a computer wiz, she’s soon able to deduce the idenity of the first couple of men, and runs away to crashland in their lives while she tries to find out who her real dad is. > > Is it the mormon minister from Utah? The defense lawyer in Chicago? The used cars sales man in Texas? The janitor in Georgia? The taxidermist from Tennessee? The man wanted in both Florida and Delware for bigamy? Tune in to FOX and find out! I would so watch this one! Even more so if the promos featured something along the lines of [The baby is black, But the dads/mom is white](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bP01X01-ufQ) or just a photo like [this one.](http://www.tuningsuche.de/imgdata/CACHE/597/65101-660-0.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Controvert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@The\_Controvert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Controvert)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/32 "2010-04-29T14:35:15Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > **Frankenstein** > > After a tragic accident which took his life, the head of Barney Frank is attached to a reanimated corpse that displays one key personality difference… he’s now a Republican! Meredith Baxter Burney co-stars in this high-concept RomCom. This works better if Al Franken’s head is attached to the body of Ben Stein. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/33 "2010-04-29T14:55:43Z")
This is from a MPSIMS thread _Ok,Im new here,Carol is the name_, which, despite the title is about ‘paranormal’ activity. I made a serious post there, and just realized that it would work here equally well, but not as a sitcom: [QUOTE=Attack from the 3rd dimension] So…I’m visualizing Navy Seals, on a mysterious silent flying machine rappelling down and killing a cow, possibly with a neurotoxin, then dangling above it while they core its butt-hole and pluck out its eyes, possibly using some sort of laser or surgical device, then slithering up the lines and silently flying away. [/QUOTE] We could call it…_Special Ops_. No, wait…_Very Special Ops_. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/34 "2010-04-29T15:06:53Z")
Rule #1: Any one of these needs to have Jason Alexander as the star. How about redoing “Homies from Outer Space” with an all-Arab cast. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/35 "2010-04-29T15:12:15Z")
I get that everyone likes to stick it to Fox News because the network is run by morons, but Fox is run by an entirely different group of people who don’t give a shit what political affiliation you carry. > [@The\_Controvert](#): > > This works better if Al Franken’s head is attached to the body of Ben Stein. This however, is shear brilliance. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/36 "2010-04-29T15:15:52Z")
**Dolf n’ Me**. The hilarious hijinks of two down-on-their-luck art students in pre-WWI Austria trying to make it big. ---
**Author:** ![robgotabingbang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d07c76/32.png) [@robgotabingbang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robgotabingbang)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/37 "2010-04-29T18:03:47Z")
How about “Moojahadin”, wherein militant Islamic cows wage fatwa upon the infidels. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/38 "2010-04-29T18:42:16Z")
> [@MacSpon](#): > > **Me and the Beavers** > > Owing to various unlikely circumstances (possibly involving a will, a deceased sea captain and a 108-year-old lady), a ne’er-do-well young white man aged between 18 and 22 is awarded custody of seven teenage black girls (minimum age 14, maximum 17) whom he has to raise, acting as guide, mentor and father figure. In less time than you’d think\*, all seven girls actually have their eyes set on him – but he, being the naive kind, never notices. > > As an extra gag, the guy has a pair of pet beavers which he keeps in the bathtub. We never actually see the beavers, but we sometimes hear them slapping their tails on the water when someone says an especially funny line. > > - Astonishingly. Change the black girls to Japanese girls and make the 14 year old ridiculously busty and you have an anime! In the anime though the beavers are incredibly cute and can talk. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/39 "2010-04-29T18:48:20Z")
Work with me here, people. I have a killer title, but nothing else: **Scrotes and Goats**. I’m thinking maybe an animated kids show? ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2010, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691/40 "2010-04-29T18:53:09Z")
**Bob And The Cannon** The premise: a guy named Bob has a cannon, & roams America, using swift & blinding artillery-based shennanigans to solve all social ills. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-all-think-of-the-shittiest-sitcom-idea-we-can-pitch-fox/537691.md?page=3)