# Let's create Urban Legends! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 30, 2017, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628 "2017-09-30T03:32:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/1 "2017-09-30T03:32:05Z")
September 4, 1978, Sears Roebuck Tower, Northeast Philadelphia. [![](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nwSZqg-tiBM/UVH4naoPmYI/AAAAAAAAACQ/7mA6GZHys-8/s1600/SearsCardCow00469_fr.jpg) ](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nwSZqg-tiBM/UVH4naoPmYI/AAAAAAAAACQ/7mA6GZHys-8/s1600/SearsCardCow00469_fr.jpg) A clear sky with mild 5mph wind blowing NNE. A bright streak of light shoots down from the sky and impacts the wide center median of Roosevelt Boulevard. [![](https://hiddencityphila.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Roosevelt-Blvd-at-Oxford-Circle.jpg) ](https://hiddencityphila.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Roosevelt-Blvd-at-Oxford-Circle.jpg) A tight but violent tornado-like funnel cloud erupts from the ground, instead of from a cloud above. This meteorological anomaly, strangely, stays put at the ground-zero impact zone. [![](https://www.askamathematician.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/chilevolcano.jpg) ](https://www.askamathematician.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/chilevolcano.jpg) As News Media and onlookers gather over the course of an hour (at a safe distance), NASA astronomers announce that a low mass quantum singularity entered the atmosphere and crashed at the site. We had been impacted by a small Black hole. As abruptly as the event started, the Black Hole Tornado dissipated and simply left a bus-sized crated in the middle of the grass. News reporter Jeff Mitchelson and cameraman J.J. “Boog” Becquith boldly proceded toward the crater to investigate… …and dissapeared. :eek:☹ Recently, an ameteur video editor has enhanced the last frames broadcast from the camera with digital processing tools not available in the 70s and discovered, instead of the Sears tower…which had been demolished in 1994…a Home Depot and mid 90s vintage Nissan Sentra were visible. This has led those to believe that the journalist and cameraman may one day re-emerge into our corner of the space-time continuum. _Jeff and Boog, come home…we have been keeping the candle burning for you._ ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/2 "2017-09-30T04:22:49Z")
Chik Fil-A puts carcinogenic Chemicals in their sandwiches that their founder Pruett Cathy believes will cure homosexuality. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/3 "2017-09-30T15:49:01Z")
> [@Enola\_Straight](#): > > As News Media and onlookers gather over the course of an hour (at a safe distance), NASA astronomers announce that a low mass quantum singularity entered the atmosphere and crashed at the site. We had been impacted by a small Black hole. > > As abruptly as the event started, the Black Hole Tornado dissipated and simply left a bus-sized crated in the middle of the grass. > \*\*News reporter Jeff Mitchelson and cameraman J.J. “Boog” Becquith boldly proceded toward the crater to investigate… > > …and dissapeared.\*\* :eek:☹ Earth has been impacted by a Chronosynclastic Infundibulum, and they stepped right into it! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/4 "2017-09-30T17:23:23Z")
It’s perfectly fine for dogs to have chocolate; the caffeine and theobromine enables them to actually form words when they bark, but that’s the last thing ANYBODY wants. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/5 "2017-09-30T17:32:00Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > It’s perfectly fine for dogs to have chocolate; the caffeine and theobromine enables them to actually form words when they bark, but that’s the last thing ANYBODY wants. Yeah, if dogs could talk, they wouldn’t be our best friends anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/6 "2017-09-30T17:41:53Z")
Richard Milhouse Nixon is alive & well, & is the man inside the “Barney The Dinosaur” costume. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/7 "2017-09-30T17:59:37Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Chik Fil-A puts carcinogenic Chemicals in their sandwiches that their founder Pruett Cathy believes will cure homosexuality. Chik Fil-a closes on Sunday so that they can brainwash their employees into joining their secret cult. They put Walt Disney’s brain into an animatronic figure and he still runs Disney Enterprises today. (Probably not, he would have never bought the Muppets) ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2017, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/8 "2017-09-30T18:16:15Z")
Myopia is caused by eyestrain from _not sitting close enough to the television!_ ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2017, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/9 "2017-10-01T01:18:39Z")
Careful, man. There was this guy my brother went to high school with who had the same idea. He tried to start an urban legend about a gang that cut off fingers to get wedding rings, but the police took him seriously and arrested him during homeroom. They charged him with domestic terrorism. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2017, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/10 "2017-10-01T01:30:33Z")
I once responded to a post like this by suggesting that people were using telephone coin returns to spread anthrax, right after the anthrax scare following 9/11, and shortly after that, I saw it posted as real somewhere, and then the UL about the “HIV-coated syringes” are being stuck in payphone coin returns showed up, which may have been an offshoot of my anthrax legend, and that one really took off; it only died out when payphones died out. So be careful with this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Kiwi\_Fruit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kiwi_fruit/32/12_2.png) [@Kiwi\_Fruit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiwi_Fruit)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/11 "2017-10-02T01:23:57Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > Careful, man. There was this guy my brother went to high school with who had the same idea. He tried to start an urban legend about a gang that cut off fingers to get wedding rings, but the police took him seriously and arrested him during homeroom. They charged him with domestic terrorism. I see what you did there. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/12 "2017-10-02T01:47:30Z")
> [@Kiwi\_Fruit](#): > > I see what you did there. Tell your friends! ---
**Author:** ![Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enter_the_Flagon)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/13 "2017-10-02T01:50:53Z")
That mysterious sonic weapon that deafened U.S. diplomats in Cuba? It was developed by Putin, and he’s installing it into all our cellphones. He plans to activate it if we fail to re-elect Trump. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/14 "2017-10-02T05:53:05Z")
> [@Enter\_the\_Flagon](#): > > That mysterious sonic weapon that deafened U.S. diplomats in Cuba? It was developed by Putin, and he’s installing it into all our cellphones. > > He plans to activate it if we fail to re-elect Trump. Putin would be put out. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/15 "2017-10-02T06:49:30Z")
Y’all know that story about the JATO Rocket Car, right? Of course y’all do. There’s been a story kicking around for quite some time by a guy who claims that he engaged in a prank that he thinks, once the Urban Legend became fully evolved, became the Rocket Car story. (Hey, urban legends gotta start _somewhere_!) The story was on the Cult of the Dead Cow site for a long time, and it’s floated around ever since. The story is very long, very detailed, and has a sheen of plausibility to it – and is also very entertaining to read. Check it out! ETA: Oops. Forgot the link! [Here](http://www.the-clearing.org/Jato/rockit.htm). ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/16 "2017-10-02T13:04:58Z")
That link triggered lots of malware warnings on my powerbook. Here’s the[Rocket Car story from Wired](https://www.wired.com/2000/08/rocketcar/). ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/17 "2017-10-02T13:15:32Z")
Everyone who pisses off OJ Simpson is doomed. Think about it. He got angry at his ex-wife and her “lover.” He got angry at Troy McClure for the line “But for that ending to work, you’d have to ignore all the Simpson DNA evidence. And that would be downright nutty.” He got angry at Las Vegas for imprisoning him, and look what happens the day he get out! Word up: DO NOT PISS OFF OJ ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/18 "2017-10-02T15:31:11Z")
> [@digs](#): > > That link triggered lots of malware warnings on my powerbook. > > Here’s the[Rocket Car story from Wired](https://www.wired.com/2000/08/rocketcar/). Odd. I got no warnings from my link (but, full disclosure, I run my browser with JavaScript disabled) but my browser won’t open any links from Wired, with or without JS. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/19 "2017-10-02T15:36:04Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Yeah, if dogs could talk, they wouldn’t be our best friends anymore. Paisan! You got a cookie? BIP: The ozone hole over Antarctica is caused by the massive amount of eons of penguin farts. ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2017, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628/20 "2017-10-02T17:41:46Z")
Those jeans are actually designed to make your ass look fat. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-create-urban-legends/797628.md?page=2)