# Lets jus't ban fucking apostrophe's.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [August 11, 2003, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443 "2003-08-11T18:20:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/21 "2003-08-11T20:30:49Z")
Gregory Hines, the genial, suave dancer, singer and actor who for many personified the art of classical tap in the **1980’s and 90’s** , died late Saturday on his way to a hospital from his home in Los Angeles.
. . . The house was moved to Garrison and fully restored as a museum in the **1950’s**.
. . . I may slash my wrist’s.
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### Author:  [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/22 "2003-08-11T20:32:23Z")
OK - I can go one better here. I once saw a **neon sign** with a rogue apostrophe – someone had gone to the trouble of actually manufacturing a little neon apostrophe that shouldn’t be there. I can’t remember exactly what it said but it was something glaring like “Half price drink’s”.
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### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/23 "2003-08-11T20:32:38Z")
. . . Oh, yeah, and a couple of weeks ago, the _NY Times Magazine_ mentioned an “ATM machine.” Which is, I can only assume, a machine which dispenses Automatic Teller Machines.
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### Author:  [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/24 "2003-08-11T20:34:19Z")
Apostrophe’s have no hole. How the hell does anyone fuck them in the first place ?
-sorr’y, couldnt resis’t. 😉
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### Author:  [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/25 "2003-08-11T20:39:14Z")
> [@](#):
>
> “DO NOT BLOCK ISLE”
Boy, you’d have to have some big-ass SUV to block a whole island!
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### Author:  [@Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bren_Cameron_1)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/26 "2003-08-11T21:32:59Z")
**dalovindj** , that laundry sounds like one I used to go to. Do they have a “Drop of Laundry Service?”
This sign has been painted and re-painted on the side of a deli/corner store for years-- “Sandwiches ‘Our’ Specialty.”
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### Author:  [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/27 "2003-08-11T22:35:02Z")
How about a car I’ve seen that has a sign in the window saying
“For Sale”
1989 IROC-Z
$4500 obo
(xxx) xxx-xxxx
I mean shit, are you selling it or not??? 😃
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### Author:  [@October](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/October)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/28 "2003-08-11T23:20:07Z")
Why? WHY? WHY??? I’m with you guys on the apostrophe thing. It drives me up the wall when people use apostrophes for simple plurals. I work in a law office right now, where I receive emails from the legal secretaries requesting file folders, which I then make and distribute. I get email after email from legal secretaries with subject lines like “Please make the following folder’s…” I’ve thus far successfully resisted the urge to correct them, lest I look like a complete ass. So I suffer in silence.
It’s not difficult. I just don’t get it.
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### Author:  [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/29 "2003-08-11T23:38:42Z")
A gas station in our town now proudly bears a spanking new sign:
“BOBS FUEL AND SERVICE”
Given all the _extra_ apostrophes running around, one would think that BOB could borrow one.
I agree when we get rid of apostrophes, the quote marks are the next up against the wall. There’s a sign at the grocery store that says:
“CAUTION:”
“SOME OLIVES MAY CONTAIN PITS”
“CAUTION”? I should be “cautious”? The snafu unfolds in my mind’s eye:
Olive Manager: Ah good, the sign is in. What? Why is it in quotes?
Sign Maker: That’s what you asked for. See, here’s the form right here!
Olive Manager: What? I put it in quotes to indicate that this is what I wanted on the sign. You’re not supposed to put the _quote marks_ on the sign! Who wants quote marks on the sign?
Sign Maker: Oh, you’d be surprised . …
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### Author:  [@Nanoda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nanoda)
#### Post date: [August 11, 2003, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/30 "2003-08-11T23:57:14Z")
Some people think using quotation marks for emphasis is [allowed](http://alt-usage-english.org/quotes_for_emphasis.html). I think it’s “so” wrong. The example I remember is a photo from someplace in the States (where this seems to happen most) over a rack of liquor, was the sign “Wine”. Which wouldn’t make me wanna buy any. 😃
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### Author:  [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/31 "2003-08-12T00:12:20Z")
Some of the signs mentioned remind me of the following, which a friend had found in a small Greek hotel (though this was presumably NOT written by someone who should know better, so we have to forgive him/her):
The management
is not responsible
for values
or precious objects
leaved in the rooms.
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### Author:  [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/32 "2003-08-12T00:14:06Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Eve \*
> \*\*Gregory Hines, the genial, suave dancer, singer and actor who for many personified the art of classical tap in the **1980’s and 90’s** , died late Saturday on his way to a hospital from his home in Los Angeles.
>
> . . . The house was moved to Garrison and fully restored as a museum in the **1950’s**.
>
> . . . I may slash my wrist’s. \*\*
Actually I believe that usage of the apostrophe is correct. But I’d still rather see someone write “1950s” than “loan’s and account’s”.
Just be glad they didn’t call him “Gregory Hine’s”.
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### Author:  [@drewbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewbert)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/33 "2003-08-12T00:16:27Z")
For years, as I went back and forth from college to home, I’d pass by a store with big, blue letters on the side: “FRANK’S GUN AND POWN”.
Actually, I don’t think I ever noticed if the apostrophe was there or not. I was always too appalled at the misspelling. Because it’s bad enough that they managed to purchase and install big letters on the side of their building without anyone noticing a problem. But what’s worse is that the owner apparently couldn’t even spell the name of the business that he’s in!
I heard a few months ago they finally fixed it.
Upstairs in the offices at work, someone attached a folder to a bulletin board full of menus from take-out restaurants in the area. The folder was, of course, labeled MENU’S. One day, after hours, I sneaked up there, grabbed a bottle of white-out and I _fixed_ it. Felt damn good, too.
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### Author:  [@gazpacho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gazpacho)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/34 "2003-08-12T00:29:11Z")
. . . I may slash my wrist’s.
I may be showing my ignorance here but that does not look correct to me. What do the wrists possess? Or were you only referring to 1950’s as being correct Spectre of Pithecanthropus?
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### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/35 "2003-08-12T00:38:53Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Spectre of Pithecanthropus \*
> \*\*Actually I believe that usage of the apostrophe is correct. But I’d still rather see someone write “1950s” than “loan’s and account’s”.
> \*\*
Nope. It’s a plural, not a possessive: “1990s,” not “1990’s.”
And my “wrist’s” gag was a joke.
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### Author:  [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/36 "2003-08-12T00:51:10Z")
I am currently having to study punctuation and such (and am realizing how absymal I am at all of it) and I believe that an apostrophe is used to indicate “missing” letters or figures. As in, '50s. See–it is supposed to be **19** 50s, so the apostrophe indicates that something is missing–the “19.” But there is no need to put an apostrophe in “1950s”, because for one thing, there’s no figures missing, and why would the apostrophe be between the 0 and the s anyway? It makes no sense.
And, when you are using just one letter (and not all letters, just certain ones) you have to put an apostrophe to indicate that you are talking about a _letter_, not making a different word. (I can see that it is too confusing to explain.) For instance, if I was indicating the _plural_ of the letter “I”, (like I meant lots and lots of the letter “I”), I would write “I’s”, because if I wrote “Is”, well, it just looks like **Is**. And that’s confusing. So the apostrophe is put in there to eleminate the confusion.
But if I am writing something like “ATMs” or “CDs,” well, there’s no real confusion as to what I mean–no one is going to think that I was writing the word “atms” or something., because there is no such word. (And the capital “ATM” followed by the lowercase “s” really eleminates any possible confusion.) So there is no need for an apostrophe. But some people will still put it in, and in some manuals of style, I _guess_ it is acceptable to put an apostrophe in “ATMs” and “CDs”, etc., but I personally don’t like it. At all.
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### Author:  [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/37 "2003-08-12T00:53:20Z")
This kind of thing always calls for a little bit of [Bob the Angry Flower](http://angryflower.com/aposter.html).
I so love this.
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### Author:  [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/38 "2003-08-12T00:54:46Z")
Yes! I have this cartoon on a t-shirt! I LOVE it! There should be somewhere on that site where you can order your own t-shirt (through [CafePress.com](http://CafePress.com)).
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### Author:  [@chula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chula)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/39 "2003-08-12T01:03:02Z")
Psst **Squink** … When girls fuck guys, the guys’ holes generally aren’t involved.
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### Author:  [@Hauky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hauky)
#### Post date: [August 12, 2003, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/40 "2003-08-12T01:28:42Z")
**dalovindj** : Your original post’s VB code has a pair of single quotes on the left of the URL and a single double quote on the right. It’s hard to tell with the typeface the board uses, but since I have eagle eyes and am a nerd, I notice these kinds of things.
I realize that the thread is wayyyy past this issue, but I hate to leave a mystery unsolv’d.
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