# Lets jus't ban fucking apostrophe's.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [August 11, 2003, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443 "2003-08-11T18:20:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 10
**Page:** 6
### Author:  [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)
#### Post date: [August 20, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/101 "2003-08-20T03:08:40Z")
How many of you have seen this? – a plural posessive written as apostrophe-e-s? Yup, that’s right; plural class to class’es. You can almost admire the strenuous brainfarting it took to come up with that one. :rolleyes:
This is a bit off-topic, but… While construction was going on in the subway station I enter going to work, the stairs were temporarily blocked off – or, as the sign put it, _temporally closed_.
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### Author:  [@nitroglycerine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nitroglycerine)
#### Post date: [August 20, 2003, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/102 "2003-08-20T04:44:40Z")
I have a few family members that, everytime they send me a birthday card or whatever, they always write
**"Jon"** on the envelope. Now, I was adopted, so I wonder…are they sending me some kind of subtle hint about something? :dubious:
This is the funniest thread I’ve read in a long time. Well, at least since the “1920s style death ray” thread 😃
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Chicago Faucet \*
> \*\* “tonite.” When did this happen? \*\*
I’m guilty of that. And “Tho” too. I type “I dunno” alot as well. I **don’t know** why. Thats only in regards to the internet. I would never write or type “tonite” or “I dunno” say, on a resume or something.
Jon
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### Author:  [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)
#### Post date: [February 24, 2004, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/103 "2004-02-24T22:16:59Z")
> [@Chicago Faucet](#):
>
> I, too, am sick of correcting peoples’ use of the apostrophe (notice the proper use of the plural possessive apostrophe).
Actually, it’s “people’s”. Men’s Room, People’s Court, Women’s Day, but: Ladies’ Night, Boys’ Soapbox Derby.
> [@Chicago Faucet](#):
>
> 1. What is the proper way to use a single set of parenthesis? Is it a full sentence inside the parenthesis, so there is capitalization and a period? If it is at the end of a sentence does it come before or after the sentence’s period?
You can make a parenthetical statement a sentence (this is a good example) or a non-sentence (like this). Terminal punctuation is almost never used within parentheses (or is it?) unless it disagrees with the sentence’s main punctuation. A period should not be used within a parenthetical statement.
> [@Chicago Faucet](#):
>
> 1. If you end a sentence with an abbreviation: “He received his P.H.D…”, do you duplicate the period?
No. My name is James, but I go by Jurph or J.R. Because I capitalize my sentences and use the (archaic) double-space after my periods, this should not be confusing.
> [@Chicago Faucet](#):
>
> 1. And semicolons. Please, someone enlighten me with the proper way to use one. Does it close a statement that comes after a colon?
No, a semicolon separates two complete but unrelated thoughts; you can use it as I just have. It can also be used when delimiting a list of complicated items: lists of place names (that include commas) like Little Rock, Arkansas; lists of titles that contain confusing punctuation like _Rex Morgan, M.D._ or _sex, lies, and videotape_; or whenever you feel they would add more clarity to a list of cumbersome elements. In this case, you should set off the list with a leading colon.
> [@Chicano Faustus](#):
>
> 1. When quoting someone, is the following example correct?
> Example: He said, “I shall be home shortly.” So I followed him home.
Yeah, that works, but next time use a QUOTE tag so we know who said it.
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### Author:  [@Jpeg\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jpeg_Jones)
#### Post date: [February 25, 2004, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/104 "2004-02-25T01:16:26Z")
I can’t remember where I heard this:
An apostrophe has come to mean “Warning! ‘S’ coming!”
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### Author:  [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)
#### Post date: [February 25, 2004, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/105 "2004-02-25T02:04:43Z")
> [@dalovindj](#):
>
> Engrish making me laugh. . .
You used two ’ rather than one " in your tag. I seem to remember another thread where someone made the same mistake.
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### Author:  [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)
#### Post date: [February 25, 2004, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/106 "2004-02-25T03:26:03Z")
At work: Employee’s Only This is an engraved sign.
Check out our “new” milk prices.
The choice for “seafood”.
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### Author:  [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)
#### Post date: [February 25, 2004, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/107 "2004-02-25T03:37:00Z")
> [@sturmhauke](#):
>
> You used two ’ rather than one " in your tag. I seem to remember another thread where someone made the same mistake.
It was probably this thread. Before it got resurected.
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### Author:  [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)
#### Post date: [February 26, 2004, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/108 "2004-02-26T05:31:13Z")
> [@1920s Style Death Ray](#):
>
> It was probably this thread. Before it got resurected.
Hah, I think you’re right. I didn’t notice the posting dates at first.
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### Author:  [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)
#### Post date: [February 26, 2004, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/109 "2004-02-26T21:00:28Z")
I’ve been grading student papers recently, and have discovered something about myself: that, faced with appalling writing and a complete inability to punctuate properly or use basic grammar, I undergo a Bruce Banner-like transformation into Bob the Angry Flower. The spouse had to come into the kitchen after I started shouting “NO! WRONG! STOP DOING THAT! WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT!?! YOU IDIOT!” and take the paper away from me for a minute while I calmed down. And I was only on the abstract. Jeebus, but it was bad.
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### Author:  [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)
#### Post date: [February 26, 2004, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-just-ban-fucking-apostrophes/194443/110 "2004-02-26T22:54:08Z")
Well thanks, **Jurph** , for giving my old thread a boost. I feel a gentle glow of affirmation.
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