# Let's make haikus about accidents involving food. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418 "2007-07-27T20:01:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2007, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/41 "2007-07-29T17:33:28Z")
A dodgy finger; An entire lamb Madras dropped Right in my crotch. Ow! ☹ Absolutely true, circa Oct 1983 ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/42 "2007-07-29T17:44:02Z")
Tasty shrimp cocktail Good conversation; you laugh Shrimp snorts up your nose [sub]Happened to my wife several years ago.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2007, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/43 "2007-07-29T18:55:25Z")
breakfast on the porch– vomit-like deer repellant– no, thanks, not hungry This morning, unfortunately. Thanks, 5 deer. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/44 "2007-07-29T19:27:13Z")
The toast always lands butter side down. Why do we butter the wrong side? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/45 "2007-07-30T12:21:14Z")
[QUOTE=rowrrbazzle] The toast always lands butter side down. Why do we butter the wrong side? [/QUOTE] The toast always lands butter side down. Why don’t you Stick it on cat’s back? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/46 "2007-07-30T12:29:32Z")
Hot grilled-cheese sandwich greatly annoys toddler son; thrown at TV set. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/47 "2007-07-30T13:05:44Z")
[QUOTE=Full Metal Lotus] Draining Hot Pasta Without strainer, use lid Noodles down the drain [/QUOTE] But wait! [Pasta Pro](http://www.asseenontvandmore.com/bpasprospilp.html) helps! “Its lid makes cooking a snap!” Just 19.99! ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/48 "2007-07-30T13:07:36Z")
Pizza and subway Good for me but not for you Sorry 'bout that, dude ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/49 "2007-07-30T19:54:40Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Pizza and subway Good for me but not for you Sorry 'bout that, dude [/QUOTE] :eek: Glad you lived to wax poetic about it. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/50 "2007-07-30T20:01:21Z")
Good thread for a link to [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=430807) one about acci- dents in the kitchen. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/51 "2007-07-30T20:38:37Z")
Urgent Thirst Problem. Mountain Dew looks like urine. I’ll have the crab juice. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/52 "2007-07-31T08:15:43Z")
Ever put two cups Of salt instead of sugar In a cake? I did. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/53 "2007-07-31T13:56:00Z")
Recipe calls for Blanched almonds Substitute not Hickory salted. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/54 "2007-07-31T14:39:39Z")
A geek eats Chinese Can’t keep himself from thinking: Dim sum as array ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/55 "2007-07-31T14:43:01Z")
Bigtime geeky guy. Looks down upon non ubers. Visual Basic? ---
**Author:** ![some\_white\_dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b487fb/32.png) [@some\_white\_dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/some_white_dude)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/56 "2007-07-31T19:35:46Z")
O, Tony’s Pizza Cooked directly on the rack Dropped — now a floor pie ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/57 "2007-07-31T19:56:02Z")
Truck full of jelly Hit by car – contents spill out What a traffic jam! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/58 "2007-07-31T20:50:12Z")
Steal my neighbor’s pool. Put sugary powder in. Eat all the jello. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/59 "2007-07-31T20:54:06Z")
Grandma’s VR Win Turkey’s set to Nine-fifty Progress Deja Vu. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/60 "2007-07-31T21:03:55Z")
[QUOTE=Sternvogel] Truck full of jelly Hit by car – contents spill out What a traffic jam! [/QUOTE] Sugar truck fell over Homer is on the scene quick Nails, glass, bees, profit? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418.md?page=4)