# Let's make haikus about accidents involving food. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418 "2007-07-27T20:01:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/61 "2007-07-31T21:06:15Z")
Third step is profit. The bees are in the what, now? No women for you! ---
**Author:** ![Bobotheoptimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/919ad9/32.png) [@Bobotheoptimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bobotheoptimist)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/62 "2007-07-31T21:32:45Z")
Boil honey for mead 1AM, spill on bare feet 2nd degree burns ---
**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/63 "2007-07-31T21:44:37Z")
Steaks in marinade. Dog sniffing the counter top. Kitten bears witness. ---
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/64 "2007-07-31T23:29:43Z")
Giant explosion Innards coat inner oven Fucking potato. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/65 "2007-08-01T00:32:17Z")
Nice custard cookie, A nice garnish with dim sum, Yuck! It’s mayonnaise. ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/66 "2007-08-01T00:47:20Z")
A drop of water rolled down the roast bag to cause blue glass explosion It’s two years later Occasionally we find more shards of blue glass ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/67 "2007-08-01T00:55:52Z")
Corpulent Hostess Brings forth a tray of desserts Yet shares with no one. ```auto The cat's tongue tastes bad Especially on my steak Let's get some pizza ! :D ``` ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/68 "2007-08-01T01:04:09Z")
A cat licks his butt And you shouldn’t ever know What his tongue tastes like ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/69 "2007-08-01T14:32:22Z")
My Taiwanese wife Some unknown food in the fridge Her lab experment ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/70 "2007-08-01T14:55:18Z")
Hot, fresh refried beans Dropped in pot onto floor now stars of brown on walls (and cieling, too!) ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/71 "2007-08-01T15:05:45Z")
[QUOTE=photopat] Nice custard cookie, A nice garnish with dim sum, Yuck! It’s mayonnaise. [/QUOTE] Mmm, buffet mashed spuds A nice big mouthful works–bleah That’d be horseradish. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2007, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/72 "2007-08-01T21:19:15Z")
First sushi dinner. Pile of shaved fish as garnish? Oh Shit! That’s Ginger! ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/73 "2007-08-02T09:44:08Z")
A shiu mai fell off my chopsticks, splashed red sauce on you, 10 feet away. (something I managed to do to my wife when out eating dim sum) ---
**Author:** ![Diceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/74 "2007-08-02T16:52:16Z")
I love calzones tomato sauce on my shorts hope that washes out ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/75 "2007-08-02T23:49:42Z")
In three parts: Summer blueberries handpicked, saved 'til November Screw cake, birthday pie! Scratch lattice crust gorgeous. Guests on the way, must cool quick. I know, in the fridge! Lifting to top shelf, pie slips in dish, explodes on floor. Dog’s greatest dream fulfilled. ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/76 "2007-08-02T23:58:34Z")
\*also all four walls, all appliances, in fridge and on ceiling. Weep. ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/77 "2007-08-03T00:01:02Z")
[QUOTE=NajaNivea] Lifting to top shelf, pie slips in dish, explodes on floor. Dog’s greatest dream fulfilled. [/QUOTE] Don’t leave baklava on the counter. Dogs can jump, scarf it all, then hurl. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/78 "2007-08-03T00:43:21Z")
Attention, haiku writers! 5-7-5 is the pattern! Learn it! For the record, I first instigated the **NOT HAIKU** thing [here.](http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Sophia) ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418/79 "2007-08-03T06:30:41Z")
Crap. I knew that, but the memory puts me in a severe state. Oh, no! Punctuation messed up, too. Submitted for re-approval, please. Epic revised: Summer blueberries. Handpicked, saved 'til November. Screw cake, birthday pie! Scratch lattice crust sweet. Guests on the way, must cool quick. I know, in the fridge! Lifting to top shelf, pie slips, explodes on floor. Shock. Dog blows fuse in joy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-haikus-about-accidents-involving-food/413418.md?page=3)