# Let's Make Some Really Bad Inventions... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 3, 2010, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130 "2010-05-03T09:15:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/1 "2010-05-03T09:15:51Z")
Come up with ideas for inventions that are really bad. My suggestion: Red headlights for cars and white tail lights! “Stick out from the crowd and be seen for miles as you come barreling down the road with bright red headlights and white tail lights! Imagine the fun as other drivers notice you coming and going!” So what is your bad invention? ---
**Author:** ![xash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c6cbf5/32.png) [@xash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xash)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/2 "2010-05-03T09:35:56Z")
I have this in my Hulu queue right now: Failed Inventions [http://www.hulu.com/watch/94150/modern-marvels-failed-inventions](http://www.hulu.com/watch/94150/modern-marvels-failed-inventions) ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/3 "2010-05-03T12:24:18Z")
On an episode of \*\*The Odd Couple \*\*Felix tried to market broccoli-flavored bubble gum with opera star trading cards. Oscar told him it wouldn’t fly. It didn’t. That’s always been one of my favorite bad inventions. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/4 "2010-05-03T13:04:01Z")
The nuclear hand grenade. A strong throwing arm recommended. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/5 "2010-05-03T14:05:58Z")
Solar powered flashlight Wormburger Helper Fishnet diapers ---
**Author:** ![Desert\_Nomad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desert_nomad/32/177_2.png) [@Desert\_Nomad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desert_Nomad)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/6 "2010-05-03T14:23:50Z")
Screen doors for submarines. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/7 "2010-05-03T14:39:48Z")
Instant water. What would you add? ---
**Author:** ![Electric\_Warrior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Electric\_Warrior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electric_Warrior)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/8 "2010-05-03T15:05:22Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Wormburger Helper Haha, yesterday my friend and I discovered there was a website called Heroin Helper. My reaction: “Is that like Hamburger Helper? Does it come in a can?” So my offering for this thread is Heroin Helper. Also: Do It Yourself Biopsy Kit! “It’s a Science Toy!” ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/9 "2010-05-03T15:12:51Z")
> [@Desert\_Nomad](#): > > Screen doors for submarines. That makes about as much sense as…oh wait. The **Shurinal** ™. It’s this, uh, thing you can wear on your butt in case all the crappers are occupied and all there is is a urinal. Sort of a…fan, if you follow me. In a protective housing. On your butt. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/10 "2010-05-03T16:13:17Z")
> [@Electric\_Warrior](#): > > …Also: Do It Yourself Biopsy Kit! “It’s a Science Toy!” Almost… what the world REALLY needs is a do it yourself autopsy kit. Some other bad ideas I have: Treadmills for ants Free weights for moths Artificial antlers for deer Silverware for monkies Spitoons for cobras ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/11 "2010-05-03T16:32:25Z")
Big Bag of Shattered Glass (Ages 2 & Up) E.P.T. Home Abortion Kit Fruit-Flavored Gummi Viagra ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/12 "2010-05-03T16:45:06Z")
Some inanimate object that one could pretend is a pet. Ha ha ha, imagine the hilarity! Imagine if it’s something really dumb, like a rock. A plastic fish mounted to a plaque. When you make noise around it, it sings. A hair-cutting system that attaches to your vacuum cleaner. Naw, those would just be dumb. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/13 "2010-05-03T17:48:23Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Silverware for monkies I’ve always been wondering about monkies. Is the singular form “monky” or “monkie”? I’m pretty sure it’s not “Monkee.” ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/14 "2010-05-03T17:50:15Z")
I got it! A thin plastic liner for cat litter boxes, that will immediately get ripped to shreds by the cat’s claws. Oh wait, we already have those. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/15 "2010-05-03T17:52:55Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > I’ve always been wondering about monkies. Is the singular form “monky” or “monkie”? Monkey ---
**Author:** ![dzeiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/46a35a/32.png) [@dzeiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dzeiger)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/16 "2010-05-03T18:44:01Z")
Grass-colored golf balls. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/17 "2010-05-03T19:16:22Z")
> [@dzeiger](#): > > Grass-colored golf balls. or better yet grass-colored glass golf balls. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/18 "2010-05-03T19:24:50Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Solar powered flashlight\ Heh… looks like it isn’t a silly as it sounds… [http://windupradio.com/eclipse.htm](http://windupradio.com/eclipse.htm) ---
**Author:** ![palindromemordnilap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/db5fbb/32.png) [@palindromemordnilap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/palindromemordnilap)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/19 "2010-05-03T19:47:24Z")
> [@dzeiger](#): > > Grass-colored golf balls. Golf ball-colored grass. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130/20 "2010-05-03T19:54:18Z")
Bungee throwing knives. The heat seeking flamethrower. High Explosives for Dummies. Shaped charge surgery. Thermonuclear fireworks. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-some-really-bad-inventions/538130.md?page=2)