# Let's make up first drafts of famous lines **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 3, 2016, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786 "2016-05-03T16:52:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 19
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2016, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/361 "2016-05-24T20:03:00Z")
“Zed won’t mind if I take his chopper.” ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2016, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/362 "2016-05-24T20:08:22Z")
“No, Mr. Bond. I DO expect you to talk.” “Toto, where the F\*&% are we?” ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2016, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/363 "2016-05-24T20:15:55Z")
“I don’t want to tell you the truth!” “As God is my witness, I’m really hungry!” ---
**Author:** ![Totenfeier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@Totenfeier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Totenfeier)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/364 "2016-05-25T11:18:16Z")
(low and intense): You have a social engagement next Wednesday, my friend. Yes, indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/365 "2016-05-25T12:53:37Z")
“You take the blue suppository, the story ends. You take the red suppository, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. Okay, maybe I shouldn’t have used the ‘rabbit hole’ analogy in this context.” ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/366 "2016-05-25T14:07:50Z")
Madison’s not a name? Okay, how about “Gay” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/367 "2016-05-25T14:11:56Z")
The thing is, Jake - and I admit I’ve been very reluctant to tell you this, because it’s kind of, you know, _embarrassing_ - but I suppose you should know: my sister is also, uh (coughs nervously), my daughter. Because my dad is, well, how to put it? He’s… he’s not a nice person. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/368 "2016-05-25T14:27:41Z")
Are you talking to me? It sounds like you talking to me, but are you really talking to me? If you are not talking to me, then who are you talking to? As I’ve asked you previously: Are you talking to me? Well, since I am the only one here, I will assume that you are talking to me?. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/369 "2016-05-25T15:10:45Z")
My name is Johnny, and I have arrived. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/370 "2016-05-25T15:52:06Z")
Toto, I have no fucking idea where we are. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2016, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/371 "2016-05-25T17:12:12Z")
From my precarious position on the prow of this ocean liner, I truly feel like I am the monarch of the entire globe. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/372 "2016-05-26T00:46:18Z")
Shall I compare thee to a pretty nice day? ---
**Author:** ![Totenfeier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@Totenfeier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Totenfeier)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/373 "2016-05-26T11:35:13Z")
Naah…thou’rt better looking and pretty stable. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/374 "2016-05-26T12:58:53Z")
Plus, even on a pretty day, it can get kinda windy. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/375 "2016-05-26T13:13:20Z")
It was a dim and tempestuous evening. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/376 "2016-05-26T13:13:53Z")
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Hot, sweaty and fly infested. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/377 "2016-05-26T13:23:53Z")
Would you be so kind as to send out our officers to conduct a sweep of the city, and bring in for questioning those individuals who have, in the past, come under reasonable suspicion for criminal activity? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/378 "2016-05-26T13:38:10Z")
Excuse me, but at the time I was dating and having sex with other women, we had agreed to take a respite from our on again/off against relationship. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/379 "2016-05-26T13:42:11Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Hot, sweaty and fly infested. Shall I compare thee to a summer’s eve? Oh wait, that’s a douche, never mind. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2016, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786/380 "2016-05-26T13:48:04Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Shall I compare thee to a summer’s eve? Oh wait, that’s a douche, never mind. I’ve just added a new insult to my repartee. “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s eve? Yes, cause you are a DOUCHE.” Thank you very much. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786.md?page=18) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-make-up-first-drafts-of-famous-lines/753786.md?page=20)