# Let's Trade Blows! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 4, 2005, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101 "2005-12-04T23:01:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/121 "2005-12-08T06:11:01Z")
Is it safe to stop hiding under the table. I’ll take a Bass and by the Conscious people a round. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/122 "2005-12-08T06:11:31Z")
Well that was fun. I’m glad the VR set remembered to remove those pesky bloodstains. Free drinks, eh? I don’t care what it is, just make it a double. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/123 "2005-12-08T06:15:59Z")
I feel so…macho. \ ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/124 "2005-12-08T07:55:45Z")
Anyone know what **Cajun Man** ’s poison is? I should buy him one for taking this in good part. ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/125 "2005-12-08T17:05:04Z")
**Askia** unzips shambling duck-thing-monster outfit, steps out, seething. Not so fast. Takes out magic wand, zaps entire bar. Transformed insects buzz about in terror. Now you’re all really barflies. Picks up giant flyswatter. Watch me kill seven with one blow! ---
**Author:** ![TygerDralion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e19adc/32.png) [@TygerDralion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TygerDralion)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/126 "2005-12-08T20:10:16Z")
Ummm… **Askia** , you do realize it was your wand, and not a flyswat, that you picked up, and it changed us back and changed you into a fly, correct? Now stop buzzing in my ear!!! ---
**Author:** ![call911mfc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@call911mfc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/call911mfc)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/127 "2005-12-08T20:15:29Z")
I push the start button, hit X to restart at the last saved checkpoint and presses O to enter the supermarket instead of R1 to enter the bar… ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/128 "2005-12-08T20:44:05Z")
> [@call911mfc](#): > > I push the start button, hit X to restart at the last saved checkpoint and presses O to enter the supermarket instead of R1 to enter the bar… Pick up a couple of six-packs while you’re there, will ya? Oh, and some chips. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/129 "2005-12-08T21:18:05Z")
Hey! Stop throwing beer in my face. I was already getting up. :mad: We made [Threadspotting !](http://www.straightdope.com/) :: does happy dance and buys everybody a pint :: ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2005, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/130 "2005-12-08T23:26:51Z")
[discretely readying a whipped-cream pie] “FOOD FIGHT!!!” [/pie] ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/131 "2005-12-09T00:35:03Z")
Nuh-uh! This is my favorite sweater! Snacks, anyone? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/132 "2005-12-09T00:42:46Z")
> [@KCSuze](#): > > Nuh-uh! This is my favorite sweater! > > Snacks, anyone? _an eclair hits the front of **KCSuze** ’s sweater, splats_ _freezes_ :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/133 "2005-12-09T01:02:42Z")
THAT’S IT!!! \ You’re paying for my dry cleaning. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/134 "2005-12-09T01:08:56Z")
Think the fights over do ya? SHAZAM!!! \ :eek: ☹ Aw crap. Guess I’ll have a guiness then. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/135 "2005-12-09T01:16:56Z")
> [@Askia](#): > > **Askia** unzips shambling duck-thing-monster outfit, steps out, seething. > > Not so fast. > > Takes out magic wand, zaps entire bar. Transformed insects buzz about in terror. > > Now you’re all really barflies. > > Picks up giant flyswatter. > > Watch me kill seven with one blow! Now all my Autobots have been Transformed into Insecticons. \ ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/136 "2005-12-09T01:41:53Z")
> [@KCSuze](#): > > THAT’S IT!!! > > \ > > You’re paying for my dry cleaning. 😉 Oh, well, if I’m _paying_ for all this… _grabs the cream pie, smushes it in **KCSuze** ’s face, runs away giggling_ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![rayh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/137 "2005-12-09T01:44:39Z")
Walks in. FARTS. How’s that for a blow? ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/138 "2005-12-09T01:44:51Z")
Oooh, it’s on now! \ ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/139 "2005-12-09T01:51:28Z")
:: **Regallag** flies in through a window breaking it with his head :: PUB BRAWL! :: Picks up a table and beaks it over his knee :: Bring it on, ya buncha grots! :: Smashes his face into the wall, putting a hole in it :: ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101/140 "2005-12-09T02:17:50Z")
So: being stuck in this magically transformed fly-body for the last few hours and being physically incapable of handling the magic wand to return to normal might seem awful to some of you. I, however, choose to dwell on the positive aspects of being a mavolent minded human in a fly’s body. F’rinstance… female flies are FINE when you’re a fly, too. I haven’t had this much action since college. We breed prodigiously, too. (100,000,000 flies emerge from hidden breeding grounds behind the ceiling tiles launch counteroffensive against all bar people) That’s it, babies! First this bar, then the WORLD. Make daddy proud! Up **Regallag\_The\_Axe’s** nose! Don’t forget **KCSuze’s** ears! **rayh’s** gassy ass! If you get hungry, you can always lick Kythereia’s pie-smeared face! Attack my children. Attaaaaa-aa-AAAA-aa-aaaaaaaaaaack! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-trade-blows/334101.md?page=8)