# Let's try and influence the Google Adds **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 23, 2005, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130 "2005-09-23T21:51:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/81 "2005-09-28T07:28:33Z")
Aaaaah! My brain!!! The first page of the thread gives me an ad for “Sheep and Goat Slaughterlines,” to which I say: Slaughter-wha now? The second page of this thread? Salt water taffy. On that note: Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. Sheep goat badger. (also: hee. I feel as if I’m doing something oddly illicit.) ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/82 "2005-09-28T09:44:17Z")
Gosh, I’d really like to buy a BADGER HAIR SHAVING BRUSH right now. But where, oh where can I find one? ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/83 "2005-09-28T10:02:08Z")
I was just dropping into ask if anyone knew where I might find a badger hair shaving brush, but I see you’ve beat me to it. Well, if you happen to stumble across a badger hair shaving brush, let me know. Or beam me up, Scotty. Whichever. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/84 "2005-09-28T10:25:00Z")
Yes, my wife’s been badgering me to buy a badger hair shaving brush day and night lately. Honestly, you should hear her: badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger. She never stops badgering. So if anyone knows anywhere I could find information on how to buy a badger hair shaving brush, let me know. Of course, a badger might have to lose its hair. Perhaps two badgers. A whole set of badgers even {why do badgers come in sets? do people collect badgers? special edition, commemorative badgers?}. But a few shorn badgers {or even dead badgers} would be a small price to pay for a badger hair shaving brush. Then she might cease to badger me. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/85 "2005-09-28T13:11:00Z")
\ It’s a nice day to start again > [@1920s Style "Death Ray"](#): > > It’s a nice day for a white wedding. It’s a nice day to start again. \ ---
**Author:** ![Tomcat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Tomcat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tomcat)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/86 "2005-09-28T13:18:46Z")
Country Kitchen Sweet Art Ice Cream Flavorings Italian Gelato Products Garden of Life Goatein (Pure Goat’s Milk Protein) These ads are getting more interesting at the very least. Badger. Badger badger. Badger badger badger. GOAT! -Tcat ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/87 "2005-09-28T13:42:24Z")
Well, I hope you are all proud of yourselves. Where are my gophers? ---
**Author:** ![marque\_elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71c47a/32.png) [@marque\_elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marque_elf)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/88 "2005-09-28T13:56:29Z")
``` TURTLES ``` GOATS BADGERS ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/89 "2005-09-28T13:59:50Z")
elispot sheep bioreader kits wool cytokines immunology baa ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/90 "2005-09-28T14:28:01Z")
> [@5que](#): > > Well, I hope you are all proud of yourselves. > > Where are my gophers? I am wearing them. “See my loafers? former gophers!” ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/91 "2005-09-28T14:31:56Z")
Like my loafers? Former gophers - It was that or skin my chauffeurs, But a greyhound fur tuxedo Would be best, So let’s prepare these dogs, Mrs. Potts: Kill two for matching clogs, Burns: See my vest, see my vest, Oh please, won’t you see my vest ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/92 "2005-09-28T14:45:12Z")
I was peeved about the ailing-may ist-lay ads. Now I’ve got three goat-related ads, and that makes me happy. Unethical ads that Dopers will never click on: ☹ Ads that amuse me: 🙂 C’mon Google. Surely you got some ads for badgers. ---
**Author:** ![Jillyvn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecb155/32.png) [@Jillyvn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jillyvn)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/93 "2005-09-28T14:48:27Z")
I just tuned back into the board and discovered the ads via the pit. I was certiain someone must have started a thread like this. How fun! I want to play! Fingers, toast the electric nose trimmer with yellow daisies imbedded in stalactite cave formations. Ten dead chickens, on the hybrid vehicle consipiracy. President Bush, the twelve days of Christmas interrupted by unnecessary odor. Take that, and try to sell me something… I have Google-fu ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/94 "2005-09-28T15:11:31Z")
The weird thing is, right now I see “Remote Fart Machine Sale” “Discount Products” “Meat Goats for Sale” “Fart Machines” But after I hit submit, it will instantly change to the standard mailing list ads. Anyone know why? ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/95 "2005-09-28T15:27:55Z")
**Sponsored Links** **Scalar Weapons** Tesla machines, phasers, plasma guns, 1920s-style death rays. Made in USA. Free shipping! ---
**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/96 "2005-09-28T15:37:40Z")
> [@marque elf](#): > > ``` > TURTLES > > ``` > > GOATS > > BADGERS All nude, all the time! ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/97 "2005-09-28T15:49:24Z")
> [@honeydewgrrl](#): > > All nude, all the time! Like naked naturalism at clothing-optional nudity-required nudist camps. Naked as a jaybird, the way we were born. Without clothes. Nude. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/98 "2005-09-28T15:53:11Z")
In case I wasn’t heard the first time: **Au naturel, bald, bare, bared, disrobed, exposed, hn dishabille, leafless, naked, natural, nude, open, stark-naked, starkers, stripped, unclad, unclothed, unconcealed, uncovered, undraped, undressed, and unveiled.** ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/99 "2005-09-28T16:00:34Z")
Woah we have some non rubbish ads. I’m seeing Gelato and nut ads. **Beware of Doug** seems to be the first nut. **YellowTail** gets in first with Ice Cream. and special award for **TomCat** for the Gelato and Ice Cream post today. Still no goats yet. baaa ---
**Author:** ![magpye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/22d042/32.png) [@magpye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magpye)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2005, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130/100 "2005-09-28T16:01:09Z")
How about pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs using software pigs using software pigs using software pigs using software Russian pig brides Russian pig brides Russian pig brides Russian pig brides pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork pork Why pigs? Why pigs? Why pigs? Why pigs? Why not pigs? Why not pigs? LOL - this is so silly its hysterical!!! pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs pigs [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-try-and-influence-the-google-adds/323130.md?page=6)