# Let's write a scientifically illiterate movie
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [August 14, 2012, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470 "2012-08-14T15:12:17Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/1 "2012-08-14T15:12:17Z")
Not just a movie filled with the usual chiche’s but one based on total ignorance of even basic science and math, especially misuse of technical terms.
My contribution: a planet that’s an infamous haven of vice and perversion because it orbits a degenerate star.
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### Author:  [@MostlyClueless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MostlyClueless)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/2 "2012-08-14T15:25:38Z")
“We are gathered here today because God has revealed to me…”
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/3 "2012-08-14T15:40:19Z")
All technical problem can be fixed by reversing the polarity of something.
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### Author:  [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/4 "2012-08-14T15:42:42Z")
Directed by Michael Bay. Produced by George Lucas.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/5 "2012-08-14T15:45:17Z")
It would have to involve “rolling” a Concorde, then opening the pilot’s side window while flying faster than the speed of sound and firing a flare gun out the window to lure a heat-seeking missile from the Concorde’s jet engines.
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### Author:  [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/6 "2012-08-14T15:48:01Z")
We have so many already. Didn’t you see **Prometheus**?
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### Author:  [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/7 "2012-08-14T15:48:16Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> It would have to involve “rolling” a Concorde, then opening the pilot’s side window while flying faster than the speed of sound and firing a flare gun out the window to lure a heat-seeking missile from the Concorde’s jet engines.
Followed by lots of ear-splitting explosions in THX sound… because we all know everything is louder in space.
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### Author:  [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/8 "2012-08-14T15:50:04Z")
IMDB’s goof page of [The Core](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0298814/trivia?tab=gf) would make for great inspiration.
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### Author:  [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/9 "2012-08-14T15:50:18Z")
A supercomputer with 4 picobytes of RAM and a 1 Yottabyte DVD.
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### Author:  [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/10 "2012-08-14T15:55:51Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#):
>
> We have so many already. Didn’t you see **Prometheus**?
Six posts… just a bit over my estimate.
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### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/11 "2012-08-14T15:58:11Z")
Like the classic line from some TV series, “When I flip this switch, all the sounds on this ship will be amplified by a factor of one to the fourth power” ?
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### Author:  [@Barking\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barking_Dog)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/12 "2012-08-14T16:01:10Z")
> [@Lumpy](#):
>
> My contribution: a planet that’s an infamous haven of vice and perversion because it orbits a degenerate star.
You just reminded me of a short story with that exact premise. My memory and googlefu are inadequate to come up with a name or title, but I do remember some other stuff. The protagonist is a detective of some sort I believe on a planet orbiting a star called Hell. The planet doesn’t rotate, so all the habitable zones lie along the equator and there is no law, only anarchy. The people live in hovels and murder, rape, and slavery are de rigeur except within the heavily guarded confines of a few corporation buildings that own everything. The protag gets taken as a slave, I believe at some point loses a hand, some stuff happens and kills some bad guys on a boat heading into the night side of the planet (yes not only is there atmosphere there’s water on this mercury-like planet) and I think it more or less ends there.
Ring any bells for anybody else?
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/13 "2012-08-14T16:23:41Z")
No, but the habitable zone (if it could exist) would be along the terminator, not the equator.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/14 "2012-08-14T16:51:06Z")
> [@astorian](#):
>
> Followed by lots of ear-splitting explosions in THX sound… because we all know everything is louder in space.
No-landing safely on a ski run in the Alps.
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/15 "2012-08-14T17:02:57Z")
It’s been done. What else have ya got?
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/16 "2012-08-14T17:11:21Z")
There have got to be lots of those huge gravity-defying jumps like they do in _The Matrix_.
In fact, everybody (even pedestrians on the street) should do it constantly – just to avoid brushing against someone, they leap up and run a few steps along the wall of a building or perform a ginormous leap and somersault over the person. There should be hundreds of people doing it in single shots, for totally mundane reasons.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/17 "2012-08-14T17:14:15Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#):
>
> It’s been done. What else have ya got?
Nice catch. 😃
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### Author:  [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/18 "2012-08-14T17:15:25Z")
Think of it this way: we’re making a movie with the intention of having Sheldon Cooper’s head explode before the credits start rolling. If you can do it before the OPENING credits, even better.
Ok, NOW go!
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/19 "2012-08-14T17:16:51Z")
How about someone being blown miles away while hiding in a refrigerator by a nuclear explosion…and the only damage is a bit of dizziness?
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### Author:  [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2012, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lets-write-a-scientifically-illiterate-movie/631470/20 "2012-08-14T17:20:26Z")
“Be careful, the ice planet is over a million degrees below zero.”
“On the third year of our voyage, we finally arrive at the firmament. Our landing point will be the widest space between the huge pits that hold the stars.”
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