# Letterman to be a daddy. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 12, 2003, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239 "2003-09-12T17:22:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/61 "2003-09-15T15:47:04Z")
I wonder why it took him so long to find out she was pregnant? 6 months is a long time. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/62 "2003-09-15T18:21:20Z")
handy, they were probably keeping this information private, as both of them are intensely private. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2003, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/63 "2003-09-15T20:16:42Z")
The #8 reason why I, David Letterman, will not be a good father: I need a babysitter? Call the grinder girl! ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/64 "2003-09-16T00:50:19Z")
#7. It turns out that the baby was a poor choice for “Will it Float”. #6. It turns out that the baby was a poor choice for dropping off a sixth story roof. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/65 "2003-09-16T01:16:08Z")
#5 We’re down to one diaper left in the house…and I get it. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/66 "2003-09-18T20:09:25Z")
#4 Cher will tell my child, “Your father’s an ass\*\*\*\*.” ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/67 "2003-09-18T20:57:54Z")
#3 Madonna will tell my kid, “Your father is G\*\* d\*\*\*\* f\*\*\*\*\*\* ass\*\*\*\*.” ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/68 "2003-09-18T20:58:44Z")
#2 Let’s face it… I’m DAVID LETTERMAN ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/69 "2003-09-18T21:29:19Z")
Top 10 Reasons Letterman isn’t married to His Baby Mama 1. She refuses to sign the pre-nup until he removes the “Top 10 Women I Can Do Without Your Permission” clause. 2. He’s been staying single so that he can marry Richard Simmons in Toronto during Sweeps. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239/70 "2003-09-18T22:18:29Z")
And the number one reason, why, I, David Letterman, will not make a good father… I probably won’t be allowed out of the nursing home to attend my kid’s high school graduation. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/letterman-to-be-a-daddy/201239.md?page=3)