# Lie about yourself **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 2, 2023, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965 "2023-08-02T16:45:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 42
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/822 "2026-06-17T03:00:48Z")
I was an accordion for the CIA. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/823 "2026-06-17T04:54:25Z")
According to the CIA I have no sense of humour that they are aware of. ---
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/824 "2026-06-17T11:31:00Z")
I am genuinely ashamed of what I’ve done for a Klondike bar. _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/825 "2026-06-17T12:06:10Z")
I’m proud of what I once did for an Australian pub. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/826 "2026-06-17T13:19:17Z")
My Australian pub is sailing through the Mesopotamian Ocean on its way to deliver bicycles to the penguins. ---
**Author:** ![dirtball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dirtball/32/18772_2.png) [@dirtball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dirtball)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2026, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/827 "2026-06-17T14:55:00Z")
I have an Australian pub in my bathroom closet. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/828 "2026-06-18T18:54:06Z")
My bathroom closet is almost a quarter-mile long. What? I need all that space for my toothpaste collection. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2026, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/829 "2026-06-20T01:44:14Z")
I once burped so loud I shattered a car windshield. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2026, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/830 "2026-06-21T01:21:46Z")
I love going swimming with killer whales. ---
**Author:** ![dirtball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dirtball/32/18772_2.png) [@dirtball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dirtball)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2026, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/831 "2026-06-21T01:26:51Z")
One time I was browsing in a furniture store, and a lady who was nearby caught the sales guy’s attention and told him she was interested in “that floor lamp over there,” pointing at me. They walked over and started looking me up and down and talking about me. I said, “I’m not a floor lamp,” but they didn’t pay any attention. He took her over to the cash register and rang me up for a hundred dollars, telling her he could have me delivered to her house on Tuesday morning. At that, I walked out and never heard any more about it. I don’t know if the lady got her money back. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/832 "2026-06-27T05:22:11Z")
I _do_ know if she did. And I ain’t tellin’! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/833 "2026-06-27T11:26:55Z")
I was the Gerber baby, not Humphrey Bogart. ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/834 "2026-06-27T11:51:31Z")
Wait – somebody thought that **burpo** was Humphrey Bogart? ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/835 "2026-06-27T12:35:41Z")
Well I certainly did. ---
**Author:** ![dirtball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dirtball/32/18772_2.png) [@dirtball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dirtball)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/836 "2026-06-27T12:51:10Z")
I thought Dennis Rodman was Humphrey Bogart. ---
**Author:** ![SunUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SunUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunUp)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/837 "2026-06-27T15:53:02Z")
I saw Dennis Rodman bogart a doobie. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/838 "2026-06-27T16:27:05Z")
I was in the Doobies for 26 whole minutes. Thanks, Michael McDonald! Thanks loads! Bastard! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/839 "2026-06-27T17:22:35Z")
I was in the concert when Pia Zadora fronted for the Doobie Brothers. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2026, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/840 "2026-06-27T18:41:35Z")
I lost my virginity while watching Pia Zadora in _The Lonely Lady_. They still won’t let me back into that movie theater. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2026, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965/841 "2026-06-28T04:00:02Z")
I was in the audience when Pia Zadora was so terrible in _The Diary of Anne Frank,_ and I know who shouted out “They’re in the attic!” when the Nazis showed up. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965.md?page=41) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lie-about-yourself/987965.md?page=43)