# Limericks 3 -- For Spiderwoman **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 2, 2000, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335 "2000-10-02T13:52:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/21 "2000-10-04T13:14:15Z")
(Damn spidey… what time DO you get up in the morning???) (And welcome to the newcomers) You arise so early each morning, When others are typically scorning, Instead you are sweet, posting limericks as treats, You really should give us more warning! I say this without any jest, Today is not one of my best, At eleven this morn, life is reborn, As a friend we are laying to rest. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/22 "2000-10-04T16:55:11Z")
SouthernStyle, sorry for your loss. I hope your friend had a good life. SouthernStyle, I can say just one thing Your friends leaving a new life must bring And I wish that you would Just remember the good Let his memroy remove some of the sting ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/23 "2000-10-04T17:33:31Z")
To call her a friend isn’t true, She’s someone I never even knew, But family support, is what I purport, In wishing their in-law adieu. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/24 "2000-10-04T18:10:28Z")
You’re a fine fellow, Southern. Now back to NFL. Since the Niners are gathering steam And the Raiders are our next team I find myself lost As to who to cheer most So I’ll just have to stay in between! The game, I hope, will be a hoot And for me there’s no loser to boot If the niners can run I think they will have won By the time third quarter it will be moot ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/25 "2000-10-04T20:06:00Z")
I know that some will complain, But I simply must maintain, That I shall rejoice, when my team of choice, Subdues a tame Hurricane. (Go Seminoles!!!) ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/26 "2000-10-04T20:51:46Z")
**BrothaTJ** demeans my poor Pack By talking of talent they lack. It’s true, I’m afraid. With the way they have played They’re lucky they’re just three games back. **tradesilicon** roots for the Niners. A team which of yore played much finer. In eleven more days They will play in Green Bay. Then which of us will be the worst whiner? I just hope it’s not me who will whine. But the chances are not looking fine. For to lose at Lambeau Used to be quite a blow But it now happens lots of the time. ---
**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/27 "2000-10-04T21:34:57Z")
When there’s nothing to do, I complain that my “job” is decaying my brain - but today I was busy, sent me into a tizzy, I guess either way, work is a pain. ---
**Author:** ![BrothaTJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@BrothaTJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrothaTJ)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/28 "2000-10-05T00:28:41Z")
The Packers are easily beat, To be just three games back is no feat. Though the season just started Their demise has been charted By Chris Berman on TV last week. Of football I’m not one to talk My Bears barely manage to walk. Our offense amiss, I will tell you this: Curtis Enis is no Marshall Faulk Southern- A fan of the Noles! Ah how my heart quickly grows! Their ranking is rad, This year they will add To their streak of BCS bowls (OK cop-out on the easy rhyme there…I got a meeting in 5 minutes ok?) The Florida Coach said with a jeer, “Will no team from this state persevere?” I said to Coach Spurrier “Please, don’t worry sir! The Noles will be champions this year!” ---
**Author:** ![BrothaTJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@BrothaTJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrothaTJ)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/29 "2000-10-05T04:19:44Z")
When the sun has stopped giving its light Limerick posters are no where in sight. But since I’m a student I think posting’s more prudent To do late in the day or at night. I know you’ll return in a while To continue your limerickal style. But for the time being Other posts I’ll be seeing I’ll be back on Thursday with a smile! ---
**Author:** ![headshok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@headshok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/headshok)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/30 "2000-10-05T06:05:16Z")
I’m a Tech fan, for sure, I’m a Hokie, I don’t like the 'Noles, that’s no joke-y (???) We’ve got Michael Vick, He’s strong and he’s quick, and he ain’t done no time in the pokey! ---
**Author:** ![BrothaTJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@BrothaTJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrothaTJ)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/31 "2000-10-05T06:53:26Z")
Well hey everybody I lied, Could not fall asleep though I tried. I returned to the site And prepared more to write When another new posting I spied. I cringe to think that a Va. Tech fan Could turn this into a Hokie dreamland. Vick may be quick But he’s prone to throw picks And their schedule’s as soft as a wee lamb. My rebuttal now etched on the screen, I feel like a limerickal fiend. I’m saying good bye- And this time no lie- Tomorrow we shall reconvene. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 11:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/32 "2000-10-05T11:36:44Z")
If with puns and cliches you regale, cart them to our cyber [garage sale](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=786379#post786379). Bring double entendres, metaphors and analogies no matter how trite or how stale. We’ve got piles of virtual stuff of which everyone has more than enough. Bring many items or a few or just browse; that’s fun too. Just stay for a while, it’s not tough. -----🙂 —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2000, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/33 "2000-10-05T17:18:08Z")
OK, it’s Bush and Gore time While I didn’t go to Harvard or Yale I can tell you these two are so stale While they Gush and they Bore Excuse me, but I snore! Well, 'nuff said, off to the garage sale ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2000, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/34 "2000-10-06T02:14:09Z")
How about our _other_ Limerick loving [friend](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=40411)? ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2000, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/35 "2000-10-06T02:48:25Z")
Dear Zenster you misunderstand. We have not forgotten our friend. Though this limerick thread has a new name at its head, TN\*Hippie’s the means to our end. By his inspiration these threads started (though for now the poor hippie’s departed). But after five pages the posting takes ages So to this new thread limericks are imparted. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2000, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/36 "2000-10-06T14:57:00Z")
Soon danger will lurk on one night, enough to give anyone fright. Monsters, aliens, ghosts, Goblins, heavenly hosts, will wander streets bearing glow lights. These costumed kids find it just dandy to dress up, collect treats and candy. They traipse door to door to collect more and more. A pillowcase keeps their loot handy. But the scary part comes the next day. Children return to school, home or play. The care-givers are reeling peeling kids off the ceiling, with sugar highs and budding tooth decay. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/37 "2000-10-09T11:37:23Z")
Round this thread it’s become pretty dull; I hope it’s just the usual weekend lull. I hope this fine tradition isn’t consigned to perdition and many more pages will be full. Now Zenster, I’m requesting your aid since through circumstances two threads were made. Both threads are now dusty and my rhymings are crusty the limericks are beginning to fade. -----☹ —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/38 "2000-10-09T19:57:35Z")
Hey **Spider** it’s not all that dull, But the thread DID encounter a lull, The lurkers may scoff, but we took some time off, Let’s resume with limericks artful. Tonight I’ll watch as the Vikes, And much to Tampa Bay’s dislikes, Assails the end zone, like a Kansas cyclone, And shows off their fine end zone spikes. (OK folks, the thread is back!!!) ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/39 "2000-10-09T20:49:12Z")
The weekend has ended once more And this thread, which we all do adore, Has been once more revived And you’ve all nicely strived So my Monday won’t be such a bore. Well, its Monday. You know that that means. We shall talk about NFL teams! For the big game tonight Will be quite a good fight And our eyes will be glued to our screens. This Sunday was no happy treat. 'Cuz my Packers just keep getting beat. They left their fair home For the cruel Silverdome Where they rarely taste much but defeat. I was filled with such angry distaff Their performance was simply to laugh. They made a good run With the game almost won. Where were they the entire first half? Favre dug a deep hole right away. Two fumbles, three picks on the day. It encouraged me none To think he has done Even worse in that dome when they play. So again my hopes drop down a rung. For the Packers are playing like dung! Sure the season is long And they could come on strong But I think the fat lady has sung. But I’m sure I’ll still watch every game For I’m a true fan without shame. I’ve lived through the dregs, Through Infante and Gregg I just hope there’s not more of the same. ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/40 "2000-10-09T21:28:44Z")
My low point came Saturday night, With the Noles and the Canes in a fight, After playing real bad, the joy turned so sad, As we lost for the 3rd time “Wide Right”. sigh… HELP WANTED: Kicker. Must be able to make field goals in the last 60 seconds of games versus Miami. Excellent benefits: scholarship, tuition, room, and board. Contact the FSU coaching staff. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335.md?page=3)