# Limericks 3 -- For Spiderwoman **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 2, 2000, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335 "2000-10-02T13:52:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/41 "2000-10-09T21:39:15Z")
**SouthernStyle** , to your pain I relate. For the 'Noles suffered quite a bad fate. And just hours before At the TV I roared When Wisconsin lost to Ohio State. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2000, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/42 "2000-10-09T21:49:34Z")
The Monday night fever is back! (Sorry about the Noles and the Pack.) It’s the Vikes I’ll be cheering and Tampa Bay jeering unless Purple People grow slack. And if you have time inbetween and can tear yourselves from the TV screen at the half-time or end go and welcome my [friend](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=41489) to the SDMB poster scene. -----🙂 —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2000, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/43 "2000-10-10T11:06:21Z")
Though they could have lost near the end The Vikings have done it again. Between Carter and Moss, yup it’s really a toss-up who’s the best of these purple men. Then there’s Robert Smith, Randle and more of these helmeted guys I adore. And Green didn’t Cull Pepper He’s quite a high stepper A Dauntiing dude no one can ignore. Though the Bucs made a valiant try (that Dungy is such a smart guy) Shawn and Keeshan couldn’t hold on to get one more touchdown So the VIkes, five and O, roll on by. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2000, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/44 "2000-10-10T15:34:11Z")
Looks like sports talk… Well ‘disaster’ can amply describe Why most Bay Area sports fans do cry Both the Giants and A’s Have gone out in a haze To the Mets and the Yankees, oh my. But the Niners and Raiders played fine I could root for them both down the line No big looser in here And I’m beeing sincere But the Raiders did take it this time. There is one more thing that will be nice You’ll enjoy it, take my advice Since the weather is colder We’ll start feeling much bolder When the San Jose Sharks take the ice! ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2000, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/45 "2000-10-10T19:02:35Z")
I’m told that my actions are treason, And I must present a sound reason, For disliking the Bucs, I say simply, “Shucks, Why suffer another poor season?” The Vikings are now Five and 0h, Pretenders are two games below, The pace has been set, but noone has met, The wonderous Purple Maestro! ---
**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2000, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/46 "2000-10-10T19:19:07Z")
In many seasons past I did rather enjoy watching the Pats with my father. But now I’ve moved away, and what’s more, they can’t play, so I’ve asked myself, lately, why bother? ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2000, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/47 "2000-10-10T21:23:53Z")
Well **vix** you missed quite a good show. The Monday night game was not slow The end of the game Might have not been the same If Mike Alstott just knew how to throw. ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2000, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/48 "2000-10-11T13:36:26Z")
On Wednesday upon sound inspect, We find there’s no game to dissect, The players are resting, their accolades cresting, The fans now compete and reflect! We need a new topic we do, To revive and recharge this here zoo, What do you think, I ask with a wink, If **Spider** ’s attire were see-through? ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2000, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/49 "2000-10-13T00:06:21Z")
The garden spiders that I’ve seen on thread spinning are really quite keen. But garments would impede agility and speed as would also eight-legged blue jeans. -----😛 —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2000, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/50 "2000-10-13T16:56:03Z")
Especially for **tradesilicon** – The showdown is two days away. The Niners will challenge Green Bay. A few years ago This would be quite a row. But now what do we football fans say? Both teams have had trouble of yore. Their records are both 2 and 4. I just hope that the game Has some fun just the same. And it doesn’t turn into a bore. To the winner goes cheering and spikes To the other the long off-field hikes. A win it would seem Won’t help either team If they can’t beat the Rams or the Vikes. ---
**Author:** ![bryanmcc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@bryanmcc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bryanmcc)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2000, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/51 "2000-10-13T19:40:47Z")
on the chest of a barmaid in Wales is tattooed the prices of ales and on her behind for the sake of the blind the same information in braille there once was a girl lived in Flight who’s speed was much faster than light she left home one day in a relative way and returned on the previous night ---
**Author:** ![bryanmcc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@bryanmcc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bryanmcc)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2000, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/52 "2000-10-13T19:46:10Z")
the integral z-squared dz from 1 to the cube root of 3 times the cosine of three pi over 9 equals log of the cube root of ‘e’ ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2000, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/53 "2000-10-16T03:59:47Z")
Many of you may have just seen the Vikings win 28-16. Although the Bears tried their win was denied by Green’s lean mean purple machine. -----😛 —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2000, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/54 "2000-10-17T02:19:33Z")
Robert Smith has an un-unique name, But still he brought his “A” game, He ripped the defense, his prime-time events, Shall land him in the Hall of Fame. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2000, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/55 "2000-10-17T15:21:03Z")
Bottle, I need a drink… The Weekend was something to cherish The football games now turn night marish For two weeks my friend We lose by three at the end I fear as a fan I will perish Aw heck, I can’t possibly mean it I mean, they weren’t bad, had you seen it? The niners hung in But damn, it’s a sin To lose just by three; grin and bear it But there is always other good news Since hockey is starting anew It so freakin nice When the Sharks take the ice And make other teams come unglued ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2000, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/56 "2000-10-17T17:00:10Z")
Well **trade** I feel bad for your Niners Their offense could not have played finer. Four TDs and no win, Why it should be a sin. But the Pack somehow scored a bit higher. For victory the Niners did strive But they fall now to just 2 and 5. But they’re lucky that Stokes When he leapt to the folks Made it out of the bleachers alive. There should be such joy on my face. A win helps in this season-long race. But my joy’s tempered so For it’s just Chicago That keeps the Pack out of last place. I’ll pour you a beer and we’ll voice Our sorrow about our poor boys Who of old used to fight For that Suberbowl night Instead of a higher draft choice. ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2000, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/57 "2000-10-18T20:12:28Z")
Yup, them were de daiz… Oh well, onto a brighter note. There once was a candidate, Bush Who often spoke out of his tush When faced with debate He went for check mate But crazy Al he could not crush There once was a candidate, Gore Who had coaches on what he wore His Alpha-Male style Only lasted a while Then he made his return to a bore ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2000, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/58 "2000-10-18T21:48:28Z")
The debates I could just hardly bear. To say they were dull is quite fair. When I look at these guys It makes me realize That I wish I could vote for Jim Lehrer. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2000, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/59 "2000-10-20T03:05:19Z")
Today a wild warm autumn breeze blew most of the leaves off the trees. They blanket the yard and gaily cover the garden, sheltering summer’s last flowers from the freeze. -----🙂 —////\\ ---
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2000, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335/60 "2000-10-20T20:07:50Z")
The season I love most of all, Is autumn, or sometimes called “fall”, The climate is mild, and colors are wild, And of course, there’s college football. Well just as nice must be the spring, It’s the end of winter’s cold sting, The brown turns to green, the critters are seen, and heard, as nesting birds sing. Now summer is also alright, With sunshine so warm and so bright, Beach sand in your hair, you just stop and stare, There’s always bikinis in sight! But winter is not all that bad, Though some think the season is sad, To snuggle up tight, makes a wonderful night, And gives us more fellas called “Dad”. I guess that this just goes to show, That I usually “go with the flow”, The weather’s no match, for friends and a batch, of cookies, from fresh homemade dough. (Warm thoughts to you all this weekend!!!) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limericks-3-for-spiderwoman/35335.md?page=4)