# Limiting/flagging/forbidding post with content offensive to other members.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854>\
**Category:** About This Message Board\
**Created:** [May 26, 2018, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854 "2018-05-26T13:27:02Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 8

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**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/141 "2018-05-28T00:17:17Z")

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**Moderator Action**

This is getting a bit too heated. I’m going to temporarily close thisto give everyone who needs it a chance to calm down. Since this is still an unresolved issue, I will be re-opening the thread tomorrow (exact time depends on when I’m online, sorry for the lack of a precise schedule).

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**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/142 "2018-05-28T00:23:36Z")

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Sticking in a last post to let everyone know this is being discussed among the mods, even if this thread is closed.

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**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/143 "2018-05-28T11:52:05Z")

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Skald has taken to announcing upfront whether or not his threads are hypothetical and whether or not they have sexual content. I (female) am content with this as a solution.

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**Author:** ![D\_Anconia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@D\_Anconia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Anconia)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/144 "2018-05-28T12:27:44Z")

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IMHO, I don’t think that TPTB should be making rules/policies based on the gender of the participants.

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/145 "2018-05-28T13:02:38Z")

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> [@ioioio](#):
>
> Skald has taken to announcing upfront whether or not his threads are hypothetical and whether or not they have sexual content. I (female) am content with this as a solution.

I have still only read one Skald thread (a hypothetical that didn’t include any surprise porn) but I like the idea of labeling. That makes it easy for newbies to avoid unpleasant (to them) content, without censoring. that example given up-thread was weirdly graphic, but I think so long as it’s signaled before your eyes stumble upon it, you aren’t at risk of being unwillingly dragged into someone else’s sexual activities. (an objection above that seemed really strong to me.)

I rather think it would be polite to do this for some non-sexual topics, as well. For instance, the example someone gave of popping up in a thread about gardening with graphic descriptions of meat seems rude. But perhaps that’s covered under thread shitting or some other existing rule.

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/146 "2018-05-28T13:05:16Z")

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> [@ioioio](#):
>
> Skald has taken to announcing upfront whether or not his threads are hypothetical and whether or not they have sexual content. I (female) am content with this as a solution.

In the “can’t-win-for-losing” category, I’d prefer not to open an innocuous thread about cupcakes and start off wading through a paragraph discussing how there’s no rape, torture, or murder there. Now I’m thinking about rape, torture, and murder, goddammit. Warnings only where they’re needed, would be my preference, and no discussion of such issues when they’re not going to be discussed later.

Or, if really necessary, something bland: “This is a nonviolent thread” would be fine.

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/147 "2018-05-28T13:12:34Z")

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> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> In the “can’t-win-for-losing” category, I’d prefer not to open an innocuous thread about cupcakes and start off wading through a paragraph discussing how there’s no rape, torture, or murder there. Now I’m thinking about rape, torture, and murder, goddammit. Warnings only where they’re needed, would be my preference, and no discussion of such issues when they’re not going to be discussed later…

err, that seemed obvious.

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/148 "2018-05-28T13:13:42Z")

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> [@puzzlegal](#):
>
> err, that seemed obvious.

Skald has written a few such warnings, e.g., [this one for a post about cupcakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=855624).

Edit: aaaand it’s closed. Looks like that sort of thing won’t continue either :).

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**Author:** ![BlankSlate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blankslate/32/80_2.png) [@BlankSlate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlankSlate)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/149 "2018-05-28T13:32:35Z")

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> [@D\_Anconia](#):
>
> IMHO, I don’t think that TPTB should be making rules/policies based on the gender of the participants.

Good heavens, is there a thread proposing that somewhere?

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**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/150 "2018-05-28T13:42:27Z")

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> [@ioioio](#):
>
> Skald has taken to announcing upfront whether or not his threads are hypothetical and whether or not they have sexual content. I (female) am content with this as a solution.

ISTM, he is clearly thumbing his nose at this issue with that. Pretty sure the mod who closed the cupcake thread agrees.

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**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/151 "2018-05-28T13:58:41Z")

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And he tried to pull the same thing [in this thread.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=855622)

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**Author:** ![expectopatronum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/expectopatronum/32/173_2.png) [@expectopatronum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/expectopatronum)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/152 "2018-05-28T14:03:44Z")

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Yeah, don’t delude yourself into thinking Skald is trying to improve his behavior. He’s sneering at his critics. Good for Chronos for shutting that shit down.

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**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/153 "2018-05-28T14:07:06Z")

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**engineer\_comp\_geek** , I just want to thank you for proactively shutting down this thread to avoid it going sideways. Not to mention the rest of you, **Bone** and \*\*JC \*\*and of course the awesome, **ITD**. All 4 of you rock for sitting down and listening and waking up the mod loop.

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**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/154 "2018-05-28T14:18:10Z")

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I’ll endorse trigger warnings when they’re appropriate, but they shouldn’t be in every single thread.

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/155 "2018-05-28T14:19:34Z")

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Huh, Those posts sort of strengthen the case that Skald really wants to post surprise porn. But maybe he’s just pissed off at the discussions about his posting. With any luck he’ll cool down after a while and manage to post about cupcakes without bringing up rape, and even be able to warn people that he’s going to talk about rape when he wants to do that.

Too bad, I’d have liked to give input on his cupcake question. Maybe he’ll start another thread. 😉

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**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/156 "2018-05-28T14:25:02Z")

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> [@Chimera](#):
>
> Can you logically explain how I was pushing back on this issue?
> 
> No?
> 
> Just accuse me of misogyny and dismiss me and other men because this is a ‘woman only’ discussion?

Chimera, would you answer the following question please?

What does a woman mean when she says a man is being dismissive?

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**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/157 "2018-05-28T14:25:46Z")

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Skald… :smack:

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**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/158 "2018-05-28T14:26:48Z")

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> [@Morgenstern](#):
>
> Chimera, would you answer the following question please?
> 
> What does a woman mean when she says a man is being dismissive?

You’d have to ask that woman what she means and how she believes he is being dismissive. No one can read minds.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/159 "2018-05-28T14:39:58Z")

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Bias, racism, hate are not acceptable in any form.

I had a friend about 20 years ago who got held up by a black man and forced to drive around for an afternoon while the guy did drug deals. He became a virulent racist after this. Is his racism acceptable because he had a bad experience with a black man?

No, no it isn’t.

What some people here are asking me to accept is that Misandry is acceptable and we should show nothing but acceptance and sympathy, or be silent. Because for some reason, when women have bad experiences with men in their lives, it is acceptable for them to display anger and hate toward men. Even though when we won’t accept it from others.

No. I’m not going to accept one form of bigotry and hate when I don’t believe that any form is acceptable.

Tell me I will never understand? True. I’m not going to understand your hate. I’m not going to try. I don’t know your experiences or your thought process, so I’m never going to understand your situation. I just know that you’re asking me to tolerate your hate against me and all other men, and my answer is no.

Tell me I’m tone deaf? Seems the shoe is on the other foot there. You’re insisting on throwing your hate in my face, you refuse to see it for what it is, and you’re tone deaf to anyone trying to point out that it is wrong. Especially men telling you it is wrong.

Silence or support of this bigotry is wrong. Period.

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**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\
**Post date:** [May 28, 2018, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/limiting-flagging-forbidding-post-with-content-offensive-to-other-members/814854/160 "2018-05-28T14:43:31Z")

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> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> Skald has written a few such warnings, e.g., [this one for a post about cupcakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=855624).
> 
> Edit: aaaand it’s closed. Looks like that sort of thing won’t continue either :).

> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> And he tried to pull the same thing [in this thread.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=855622)

Whelp, I guess that clears up whether he’s been reading these threads…

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