# Lindsay Lohan - HIRE A DRIVER ALREADY!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 24, 2007, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955 "2007-07-24T14:06:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/101 "2007-07-25T18:32:17Z")
Yeah, and speaking of double standards, why is it ok for female employees to use a breast pump at work, but when I do it, it’s “offensive” and “disturbing” and causes Human Resources to express “serious concern for my mental state?” Fair is fair, right? Come on, people! HIGH-FIVE! Who’s with me? ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/102 "2007-07-25T18:38:35Z")
[QUOTE=fetus] No, but the fact that negative gossip about Hollywood women is more talked about by orders of magnitude, is. I know all about the stories of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, etc., but I can’t think of a single male celebrity mentioned in this thread–except for Robert Downey, Jr., but we’ll get to that later–who I had heard a bad word about before reading it here. [/QUOTE] Rob Lowe’s teenage girls in a hotel room? Brad Pitt cheating on this wife or the last one? Mel Gibson’s drunken rantings and politics? Russell Crowe’s unusually violent and assholish behavior? Nick cheating on Jessica again. (aside yet once again, who the hell are Nick and Jessica and why do I care - these people are mysteriously famous to me). You must only get your celebrity gossip from the Dope and never look at the cover of the Star in the grocery store line. Granted La Lohan seems to have a certain can’t look away trainwreck to it. For me its partly because I LIKE her as an actress - she’s good. She’s charismatic. At one point she seemed like a real halfway decent human being. And part of me is watching the trainwreck in the hope she pulls out of the nosedrive - because you can become a recovering alcoholic cokehead (and I think her sober sexual life is her own business - I’m concerned about her non-sober sexual life simply because I wonder how many of these choices she’d make sober). Where I could care less it Paris Hilton releases videos of her in compromising sexual positions (again) or Brittney heads to rehab (again). ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/103 "2007-07-25T18:40:10Z")
[QUOTE=Wee Bairn] You’ve never done something whilst on drugs that seemed like a good idea at the time, and then regretted it? [/quote] On drugs, yes. (Klonopin, FWIW. And alcohol, but that’s another story.) On coke, no. Not all “drugs” are the same. If you’re going to argue that all drugs turn people into “addled idiots” who will agree to anything because it sounds like a good time, how do you account for the fact that thousands of people who eat Vicodin or Lortab every day on a doctor’s orders, don’t go shooting porn videos for fun? > [@Wee Bairn](#): > > You don’t think a smoothe talking drug dealer could talk a drug addled idiot into something like that hypothetically? I stand by my assertion that a couple lines of coke will not make Ms. Lohan suddenly susceptible to the suggestion of starring in a porno. The “impaired judgment” that’s often given as a negative effect of cocaine is not at all the same thing as the “impaired judgment” caused by other drugs. Alcohol is the king of “impaired judgment” drugs–rather than being an indirect effect, it’s virtually a guarantee, if you drink enough liquor in one night. The fact that Ms. Lohan has imbibed seemingly Herculean amounts of liquor and there’s still no porno, not even an ill-gotten sex tape, leads me to believe that no drug will make her do that by itself. > [@Wee Bairn](#): > > Two years from now and the money is running out and she still is on drugs, a dealer offers her a bale of coke to sign a release and bang her on camera, its a guaranteed no? That’s a different question entirely. From my experience with the black market, BTW, anyone who has that much coke to offer doesn’t need to make porn; and if he does, it’s for his own amusement, not as a business venture. Which means that he’d be offering drugs for sex, not porn. That she would agree to that when the money ran out, well, I wouldn’t be surprised. As for the porno side of it, if you’re asking: “When Lindsay Lohan has no career to speak of, has blown all of her money on coke, and needs more cash to supplement her raging habit, could she desperately run to porno?” That’s a definite yes. But what you said was: > [@Wee Bairn](#): > > in her state she may do it while spaced out just for shits and giggles. I call BS on that. > [@Wee Bairn](#): > > As for the slut part, the double standard has existed throughout history- its not like its anything new. And if I were a hot girl like her I’m sure I’d be banging all the hot young girls or guys I could as well. True and true. I certainly have no illusions about changing the double standard in a CS thread, this just seems like a perfect time to lament it. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/104 "2007-07-25T18:42:35Z")
Were the terms “skank” and “slut” thought up or popularized by men or women? Normally, the activities that define them are thought of favorably by a large percentage of young men. Really, guys aren’t usually all that creative with insults so “asshole” suffices in most situations. Expanding your vocabulary to include “prick,” “cunt,” “motherfucker,” and “cocksucker” can make you the Mencken of your social group. ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/105 "2007-07-25T19:17:20Z")
**fetus,** by “spaced out and do a porn for shits and giggles”, I didn’t mean an actual Vivid Video porn with script, cameras and sets. I meant, is it totally unthinkable that any girl could, while on drugs, get talked into having sex with a guy or girl, regardless of who they are and their financial situation? Cocaine is apparently LL’s drug of choice, but don’t you think there’s a wee chance she has dabbled in drugs that make one more amorous? Again, check out the Girls Gone Wild videos. If she were hanging with a really hot girlfriend at a drug dealers house doing ecstasy, you are positive she couldn’t be talked into doing the chick whilst someone videotapes? ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/106 "2007-07-25T23:45:43Z")
[QUOTE=Wee Bairn] **fetus,** by “spaced out and do a porn for shits and giggles”, I didn’t mean an actual Vivid Video porn with script, cameras and sets. I meant, is it totally unthinkable that any girl could, while on drugs, get talked into having sex with a guy or girl, regardless of who they are and their financial situation? Cocaine is apparently LL’s drug of choice, but don’t you think there’s a wee chance she has dabbled in drugs that make one more amorous? Again, check out the Girls Gone Wild videos. If she were hanging with a really hot girlfriend at a drug dealers house doing ecstasy, you are positive she couldn’t be talked into doing the chick whilst someone videotapes? [/QUOTE] I’m not positive of that at all. That said, the fact that it hasn’t happened yet, not even in a leaked sex tape–and it seems like there would have been plenty of opportunity–means she’s probably taken pains to avoid it. OTOH, she may well delve deeper into addiction and find herself in that position, so to speak. I’ll concede that it’s more probable for it to happen to Lindsay Lohan than to most actresses of her age and renown. ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/107 "2007-07-25T23:51:00Z")
[QUOTE=fetus] I’m not positive of that at all. That said, the fact that it hasn’t happened yet, not even in a leaked sex tape–and it seems like there would have been plenty of opportunity–means she’s probably taken pains to avoid it. OTOH, she may well delve deeper into addiction and find herself in that position, so to speak. I’ll concede that it’s more probable for it to happen to Lindsay Lohan than to most actresses of her age and renown. [/QUOTE] Fair enough 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2007, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/108 "2007-07-26T01:54:09Z")
[An interesting theory on why they don’t use drivers.](http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1119228427) (video) ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/109 "2007-07-28T02:47:45Z")
Per Nancy Grace, LL may be guilty of carjacking (without a weapon?) and kidnapping or false imprisonment? And she wasn’t driving “the black guy was”? Not sure if that’s funny or sad. Oh well, it worked for Susan Smith… ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/110 "2007-07-28T03:10:17Z")
[QUOTE=Geobabe] [An interesting theory on why they don’t use drivers.](http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1119228427) (video) [/QUOTE] It’s 2:10 of Walken making a chicken dinner. Wha’d I miss? ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/111 "2007-07-28T04:01:59Z")
[Holy crap!](http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/27/lindsay-i-wasnt-driving-the-black-kid-was/) :eek: :eek: :eek: If the guys in the videos are telling the truth, she could go away for a Very Long Time. Let’s add 'em up. Theft of a motor vehicle. Federal? Kidnapping. Federal. Leaving the scene of an accident with bodily injury. Serious state. Reckless endangerment(?). Making false statements to the police. Traffic violations too numerous to list. Anyone spot a few more? Oh, and those guys are soon to be very rich. Although if they hang around with people like her, they probably already are. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/112 "2007-07-28T04:23:18Z")
[QUOTE=Oslo Ostragoth] [Holy crap!](http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/27/lindsay-i-wasnt-driving-the-black-kid-was/) :eek: :eek: :eek: If the guys in the videos are telling the truth, she could go away for a Very Long Time. Let’s add 'em up. Theft of a motor vehicle. Federal? Kidnapping. Federal. Leaving the scene of an accident with bodily injury. Serious state. Reckless endangerment(?). Making false statements to the police. Traffic violations too numerous to list. Anyone spot a few more? [/QUOTE] :smack: Possession of cocaine, and transportation into a secure facility. :smack: Which happened because she was wearing someone else’s pants. Can’t wait to hear how she traded pants with someone. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/113 "2007-07-28T05:38:49Z")
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug] It’s 2:10 of Walken making a chicken dinner. Wha’d I miss? [/QUOTE] Feh. I hate how TMZ does that. [Here](http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/25/lilo-the-driver-dilemma/) is the story it came from, though the video had much more detail; basically, drivers have been called as witnesses in some criminal cases. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/114 "2007-07-28T09:06:51Z")
[QUOTE=Geobabe] Feh. I hate how TMZ does that. [Here](http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/25/lilo-the-driver-dilemma/) is the story it came from, though the video had much more detail; basically, drivers have been called as witnesses in some criminal cases. [/QUOTE] Well, if you remember the Sean “Puffy” Combs and Lil’ Kim incident (firearm in a nightclub) a few years ago, their driver _totally_ burned them to the cops. Not only did he refuse $50,000 from Combs to say that the gun was his, he told the cops about the bribe offer. Shit like that is why a lot of celebs probably don’t want a driver. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![well\_he\_s\_back](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3ab097/32.png) [@well\_he\_s\_back](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/well_he_s_back)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955/115 "2007-07-28T21:47:39Z")
This was like the totally worst week for pop-tarts evar… 1st the Lohan driving fiasco. Then Britney has an interview fiasco wherein she wipes fried chicken on a borrowed designer dress, lets her dog poop on another. then stalks out without returning unruined borrowed finery. (Wish I had a link - It would be easy enough to find on google news.) Then the Lohan driving story gets worse. Then the Lohan movie opens and is getting absolutely slaughtered by critics. Vying with License to Wed for worst of the year bad. It’s all enough to make me think it’s a plot to keep our minds off Iran and the US health care crisis. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lindsay-lohan-hire-a-driver-already/412955.md?page=5)