# Lines to spoil a movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 20, 2008, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045 "2008-12-20T06:17:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/1 "2008-12-20T06:17:55Z")
Post some like these: **It’s a Wonderful Life** (Man in bank, yellling) “Hey, Mr. Bailey, you gave Potter the envelope with the money in it!” **Rear Window** “Mr. Jeffries, the landlord sent me. We’re having the entire building fumigated. You’ll have to move out for a few days.” **The Caine Mutiny** (Captain Queeg) “ComServPac has sent us back to Honolulu. The radar installation we had installed has failed and they don’t want us out here during a storm warning.” **Around the World in 80 Days** Phileas Fogg: “Passepartout, that was a wise idea, securing the restraining order against Fix. Check the chronometer we brought so we’ll always know the time in London.” **The Professionals** “Find your own damn wife.” **Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid** “Hell, no! I thought YOU brought the ammunition!” **The Wizard of Oz** (Wicked Witch of the East) “I can travel anywhere with these ruby slippers; I just click the heels 3 times and say, ‘There’s no place like home’–OOF!” (house falls on her) ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/2 "2008-12-20T14:01:16Z")
Angel Heart] (De Niro to Rourke) I’m the Devil,you sold your soul to me and I’ve come to collect. Charge of the Light Brigade (Captain Nolan to Commander of British Forces in the Crimea) The Light Brigade are to attack those guns over there,no THERE Sir!They are definitely not to charge down that long valley swarming on three sides with masses of Russian artillery and infantry. A Bridge too far (Eisenhower to Monty) Nice plan Monty,I like it alot but we’re not going through with it because intelligence have told us that two SS armoured divisions have moved into Arnhem where the 1st British Airborne division is supposed to parachute into. All the Presidents Men (Deep Throat to journos) No I was messing with your heads I have nothing to tell you. Pride and Prejudice I fancy you like mad love. Good I fancy you too,lets get married. ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/3 "2008-12-20T14:32:40Z")
“Soylent Green is tofu!” ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/4 "2008-12-20T15:06:37Z")
“Rosebud… how I loved that sled!” ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/5 "2008-12-20T15:25:14Z")
> [@Olentzero](#): > > “Rosebud… how I loved that sled!” I knew someone would say this. It’s not a freakin’ spoiler, people! If you paid attention to the movie you would understand that. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/6 "2008-12-20T15:26:00Z")
“My Lord, we attempted to capture the _Tantine IV_, but I am afraid they managed to escape to light sp-HURK” “Dr. Bannon, I’m afraid the supersoldier project got axed in the latest round of budget cuts, so we’re shutting everything down. Thanks for the help, though! So, now that your schedule is open, dinner with me and Betty tonight?” “On second thought, let’s not go to Tatooine. It is a silly place.” “I’m sorry Mr. Stark, the jet got damaged in a storm last night, so we’re having to cancel on the trip to Afghanistan.” ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/7 "2008-12-20T16:20:17Z")
This brings to mind a very old joke: During a sloppy, badly acted version of “The Diary of Anne Frank,” some German soldiers enter the building looking for the Franks, and an audience emember yells, “They’re in the attic!” ---
**Author:** ![Sefton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Sefton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sefton)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/8 "2008-12-20T16:30:43Z")
“Rather than watch the movie in inner-city Gotham, let’s have a private showing of ‘The Mask of Zorro’ in our own spacious Wayne Manor. What do you think, Bruce?” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/9 "2008-12-20T18:38:51Z")
“Damn, it looks like my calculations were off. Krypton isn’t going to explode after all.” “Lucky I smashed that spider, Peter. Their bites can be nasty.” **Close Encounters** : “It’s a cookbook!” ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/10 "2008-12-20T19:05:08Z")
“Frodo Bagins, you are the only one that can wear the One Ring, and you will have to come with me… to Gruddo the Smith’s furnace, where we’ll melt the bloody thing. Want some weed?” ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/11 "2008-12-20T19:05:19Z")
Capt. Smith: “Slow down. we aren’t out to set any speed records. Besides, there are icebergs about.” Benvolio: “Nah, screw the party at old Capulet’s place. Let’s go grab some brews and pinch the barmaids.” Macbeth: “Honey, I got that Midol you wanted.” ---
**Author:** ![TheVioletCreep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eb8c5e/32.png) [@TheVioletCreep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheVioletCreep)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/12 "2008-12-20T19:14:24Z")
Jigsaw: _muscle spasm_ Oh shit… ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/13 "2008-12-20T19:30:11Z")
**Sixth Sense:** They don’t know they’re dead. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/14 "2008-12-20T19:49:45Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > “Damn, it looks like my calculations were off. Krypton isn’t going to explode after all.” Which brings to mind: Otis: Oh, good, _he’s going for it!_ And that green Krap-something’s gonna **kill** him! (a few seconds later…) Um, Mr. Luthor, did I say the wrong thing? –_ **YOWCH! OWW!!!** _ 😛 - “Jack” ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/15 "2008-12-20T19:50:28Z")
There goes another escape pod. 10 Credits says I can nail it first shot. ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/16 "2008-12-20T20:17:49Z")
“I’m going to follow the instruction to the letter - I won’t let him get wet or feed him after dark.” “I’m tired, but that Bates Motel looks spooky. I’ll keep going.” ---
**Author:** ![AlsoNamedBort](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alsonamedbort/32/3213_2.png) [@AlsoNamedBort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlsoNamedBort)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/17 "2008-12-20T20:18:42Z")
“Hey, I know it’s not in the plans, but maybe we should put a vent over this exhaust port.” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/18 "2008-12-20T20:41:08Z")
“Sure you can have that BB gun, Ralphie.” “No, Kint. You can’t be part of this. The last thing we need is a loud mouthed gimp slowing us down.” **Fargo** “Sure, Jerry. I’ll lend you the money. What is family for?” ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/19 "2008-12-20T20:54:24Z")
“Verbal, you posted bail an hour ago.” “Good, then I’d better get out of here before that Hungarian in the hospital outs me as Keyser Soze.” ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2008, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045/20 "2008-12-20T22:24:48Z")
**Star Wars Ep. IV** “Nope, sorry little droid, dunno anyone called “Kenobi”. Let’s wipe your memory, shall we ?” **Indiana Jones** “The Lost Ark ? Yeah, right. Look, I’m an archeologist. I deal with facts, not pseudoscience and folklore.” **Alien** “OK, the weird black organic corridor was creepy enough, but those disguting flesh blobs take the cake. We’re outta here.” **Groundhog Day** “Goddamnit, I am NOT travelling to Bumfuck, Pennsylvania to cover a _rodent_.” **The Great Escape** “Here we’ve got hot food, a warm place to sleep, ample free time, no officer to shout idiotic orders and no one’s trying to kill us. What’s not to like ?” **Dances With Wolves** “I want an honorable discharge and a war veteran pension. Maybe even a disability pension if you can get me one.” **Matrix** “I’m gonna go with the blue pill, if that’s OK with you.” **The Man Who Would Be King** “Mason or not, you nicked my bloody watch ! I’m pressing charges.” **Gladiator** “They’ve taken my life, my titles, killed my wife, killed my kid, burned my house… What have I got to live for anymore ? _throws himself on own sword_” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-to-spoil-a-movie/478045.md?page=2)