# Lines you'd use if only the appropriate situation came up. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 2, 2007, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111 "2007-08-02T11:23:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/1 "2007-08-02T11:23:14Z")
I have two. 1. “Nice marmot” from _The Big Lebwoski_. Does anyone I know own a marmot? No. Have I ever seen a marmot? Maybe in a zoo. I don’t know, but I’m dying to use this line. I may have to go to a zoo just to say “nice marmot”. 1. “I’ve created Lutherans!” Lisa Simpson in some Halloween episode. This never seems to come up, for some reason. Foo. It’s such a good line, too. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/2 "2007-08-02T11:43:27Z")
“Bring him to me! I want him alive!” ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ad7895/32.png) [@Just\_Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/3 "2007-08-02T11:51:11Z")
[QUOTE=Baldwin] “Bring him to me! I want him alive!” [/QUOTE] God I must say that at least three times a day. Funny enough “I will spare your life” doesn’t come up a lot… ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/4 "2007-08-02T12:16:53Z")
“Illinois nazis? I hate Illinois nazis.” ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/5 "2007-08-02T14:34:03Z")
From _White Mischief_ (directed by Michael Radford), when nothing is going right, spoken slowly and of course ironically: “Another fucking beautiful day.” (Sorry not strictly within the OP guidelines, since I get to use it a lot.) ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/6 "2007-08-02T14:43:31Z")
I only need something to happen involving a pair of things to say: “Shoot 'zem. Shoot 'zem both” ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/7 "2007-08-02T15:12:45Z")
Sit tight, hold down the fort, and keep the home fires burning. If we’re not back by dawn, call the President. Jack Burton has lots of great lines, but that’s the one I find most useful. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/8 "2007-08-02T15:17:42Z")
‘Jack, you have _debauched my sloth_!’ - HMS Surprise I don’t suppose this one comes up too frequently. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/9 "2007-08-02T15:18:36Z")
“I am gravely disappointed. Again you have made me unleash my dogs of war.” I have no idea why, but I use that every time I have an opportunity (complete with the accent). Oddly enough, I had one just the other day. Yes, people look at me funny, but I’m used to that. 😃 **muldoonthief** , he sure does, don’t he? That is one of my favorite movies of all time!! ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/10 "2007-08-02T15:23:39Z")
“Yippee kai yay muther fucker” Whispered under my breath while squezing the trigger on a target 1000 yards away. ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/11 "2007-08-02T15:30:10Z")
“I’m okay” ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/12 "2007-08-02T16:50:07Z")
In an SNL where Maya Rudolph plays Donatella Versace hosting a Halloween party, she says, “What is that squeakin’?” in this perfectly drunk voice. You would not believe how often this line comes in handy. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/13 "2007-08-02T16:55:06Z")
“To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.” Doesn’t come up much. ---
**Author:** ![Kinthalis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kinthalis/32/16084_2.png) [@Kinthalis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kinthalis)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/14 "2007-08-02T17:01:36Z")
“Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast!” Arnold J Rimmer - Space Adventurer. I have used this… probably too often. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/15 "2007-08-02T17:07:52Z")
[QUOTE=Kyla] I have two. 1. “Nice marmot” from _The Big Lebwoski_. [/QUOTE] Wouldn’t it be more appropriate to say it in the presence of a ferret? ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/16 "2007-08-02T17:25:25Z")
“Its made from monkey cum you know” from the kids in the hall movie, Brain Candy i think… i wish i could use that more often. Oh and “im so glad i shaved my balls today” from Hostel when something unexpectedly good happens. ---
**Author:** ![MacGyverInSeattle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@MacGyverInSeattle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacGyverInSeattle)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/17 "2007-08-02T17:33:54Z")
“Don’t make me get my flying monkeys!” I get to use this every once in a while with my kids. “Maybe we should just give him another one of out ancient Goblin made swords?” From the Latest Harry Potter book. ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/18 "2007-08-02T18:04:07Z")
“I swear to God I’m going to pistol whip the next guy who says, ‘Shenanigans.’” - Captain O’Hagan in **Super Troopers**. ---
**Author:** ![Gail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Gail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gail)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/19 "2007-08-02T18:07:12Z")
“Oy with the poodles already!” I can’t help it, I love _Gilmore Girls_. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/20 "2007-08-02T18:07:40Z")
Bathe her, and bring her to me. I like you. I’ll kill you last. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111.md?page=2)