# Lines you'd use if only the appropriate situation came up. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 2, 2007, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111 "2007-08-02T11:23:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/21 "2007-08-02T18:10:00Z")
I eagerly await for the proper time to use this (cliche) film line: “You ladies mind if I join in?” ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/22 "2007-08-02T18:15:41Z")
[QUOTE=Kyla] Have I ever seen a marmot? [/QUOTE] Woodchucks are marmots. You’ve seen woodchuck around Chicago, I’m sure. I caught one licking my tire. I have tried to sock away lines for just the right occasion, but by the time I’ve found them it’s usually too late. One I have used is, “Of course you realize, this means war.” ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/23 "2007-08-02T18:29:44Z")
“Is anyone here a marine biologist?” ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/24 "2007-08-02T18:36:52Z")
“Hm! An intelligent guard! Didn’t see **that** one coming!” – _Titan AE_ “You knew the assignment was dangerous when you took it.” – _Super Chicken_ (actually, the chance to use that one comes up now and again). ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/25 "2007-08-02T18:45:16Z")
‘Thank you for the wonderful night of sex, Zooey Deschanel. And in answer to your question: Yes. Yes I will marry you.’ Well, if the appropriate sitiation came up of _course_ I’d use it! ‘As a matter of fact, I _am_ a rocket scientist!’ (Okay, not professionally. But if I ever get into High Power Rocketry it’s close enough. 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/26 "2007-08-02T18:47:37Z")
“Didn’t I see a castle back there?” ---
**Author:** ![Aioua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@Aioua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aioua)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/27 "2007-08-02T18:55:27Z")
“But I was gonna go to Tahashi Station to pick up some power converters…” If someone whines at me, I’ll whine that right back at them. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/28 "2007-08-02T18:58:01Z")
“The more you drive, the less intelligent you are.” – _Repo Man_ ---
**Author:** ![WhoHasAngeredTheVolcanoGod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WhoHasAngeredTheVolcanoGod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhoHasAngeredTheVolcanoGod)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/29 "2007-08-02T19:22:18Z")
On occasions when someone has spilled a drink on me, I say in my best Peter Lorre, “Look what you’ve done to my shirt” And if I see something particularly interest, I exclaim, also in my best Peter Lorre, “I haven’t seen such a beautiful bubble since I was a child” ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/30 "2007-08-02T20:04:03Z")
[QUOTE=beowulff] I only need something to happen involving a pair of things to say: “Shoot 'zem. Shoot 'zem both” [/QUOTE] Ahhh! What is this from? It’s driving me crazy. One we use fairly often, from an adult animation festival cartoon I can’t remember the name of: “Pardon me, I was most revolting.” (Has to be said in a sort of Martin the Martian voice.) ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/31 "2007-08-02T20:09:58Z")
“Shoot zem. Shoot zem both.” — Toht, from “Raiders of the Lost Ark” ---
**Author:** ![Bobotheoptimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/919ad9/32.png) [@Bobotheoptimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bobotheoptimist)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/32 "2007-08-02T20:18:12Z")
“It’s hot in Topeka” “Tell your wife to call me if she ever wants a little boom-shaka-laka-laka, boom-shaka-laka-laka, boom-shaka-laka-laka, boom” (must be delivered in a Stephen Hawking voice) “They’ll rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we’re very, _very_ lucky, they’ll do it in that order.” - This doesn’t come up very often. In response to any query on whether I sleep with a firearm - “I would if I slept” Alas, no one asks me questions like that any more. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Bongo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a9adbd/32.png) [@Winston\_Bongo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Bongo)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/33 "2007-08-02T20:35:29Z")
“On second thought, let’s not go to [wherever we were originally planning on going]. It is a silly place.” Spoken with a British accent, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/34 "2007-08-02T20:36:10Z")
“. . . ah . . oooooo, A sparklie! I always wanted a sparklie of my very own.” From “The Secret of NIMN.” It’s rather surprising how often it comes up in daily life. Tris ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/35 "2007-08-02T20:42:52Z")
[QUOTE=Kyla] 1. “Nice marmot” from _The Big Lebwoski_. [/QUOTE] Sometimes life isn’t fair. On **TWO** occasions I’ve found myself examining a pet ferret, owned by someone who looks like they’ve seen _The Big Lebwoski_. On both occasions, after I’ve uttered the marmot line, I’ve received a blank stare. Neither pet owner had ever seen nor heard of the film. The one woman had no idea who Jeff Bridges was. Such is life. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/36 "2007-08-02T20:47:29Z")
I’m still waiting for the perfect opportunity to use, “Excuse me while I whip this out!” I’m pretty sure that if I ever tried that one in the bedroom, sex would not follow. Second on the list, and perhaps slightly more difficult to squeeze into conversation, is, “Hey, where’re all the white women?” ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/37 "2007-08-02T20:50:28Z")
My brother and I were rough housing as we are known to do sometimes, and I apparently sent an errant slap to the side of his head. He went, “You hit me in the ear!” in a perfect Brad Pitt/Tyler Durden impersonation. ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/38 "2007-08-02T20:57:50Z")
(Upon arriving at an orgy) “Anybody order a pizza?” ---
**Author:** ![essell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/34f0e0/32.png) [@essell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/essell)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/39 "2007-08-02T21:00:33Z")
“That was so bad I think you gave me Cancer” - Calculon A line with so many uses. ---
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2007, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111/40 "2007-08-02T21:14:56Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] " “You knew the assignment was dangerous when you took it.” – _Super Chicken_ (actually, the chance to use that one comes up now and again). [/QUOTE] Nitpick hat on: I didn’t think either Super Chicken or his sidekick Fred (with the backwards “F”) knew big words such as “assignment.” The word in the song is ‘job’ [Link](http://www.lyricsondemand.com/tvthemes/superchickenlyrics.html)😉 Nitpick hat off. I’m waiting for the opportunity to use, “We’re going to need a bigger boat”, quoting Xander Harris from _Buffy_ rephrasing from Brody in _Jaws._ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lines-youd-use-if-only-the-appropriate-situation-came-up/414111.md?page=3)