# Lissa, a word, if I may **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 3, 2006, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223 "2006-05-03T13:09:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/1 "2006-05-03T13:09:13Z")
Hey there, dearie. I’m not starting this to ream you out, honest, but do you think, maybe, you could post say, one whole week, without mentioning that your husband works in a prison? I mean, if it’s a thread about prisons, I can understand it, but dropping it into a thread about [the onset of female “unattractiveness”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=7350906&postcount=16) is a bit much, don’t you think? The connection was pretty tenuous, it made me go “huh?” In fact, while I realise you love him very much and like talking about him, I, for one, would much rather hear about you, and your experiences. Hell, IMHO, your job is ten times more interesting than his. I love museums! ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/2 "2006-05-03T14:44:20Z")
Seriously. I think of her as Lissa-whose-husband-works-in-a-prison. That said, she’s provided interesting information on the topic, so it’s not that bad. ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/3 "2006-05-03T15:04:31Z")
Lissa’s husband works in a prison? Wow. \ Hey Lissa: How long has he worked there? Does he work with really mean killer types or Enron Exec’s? Does he get to check cakes for files and if so do they mind if he has a slice? Could you ask him if anyone tried to escape by hot air balloon? Or trained monkeys on motorcycles? \ ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/4 "2006-05-03T16:31:06Z")
I dunno…I’m attracted to all things incarceration. I don’t care if it’s Quagdop or Lissa or who. If you’re showcasing the underbelly of society…I’m there, baby. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/5 "2006-05-03T16:35:14Z")
Meh, if you are going to have a pitting you better come up with more than one example. **Lissa** is one of my favorite posters and I have to admit that I didn’t know her husband worked in a prison until this thead, so I don’t think it comes up as often as you think. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/6 "2006-05-03T16:42:08Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > I love museums! \ Rumour has it that a very famous Cape Town prison is now a museum. \ ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/7 "2006-05-03T16:43:18Z")
> [@August West](#): > > Meh, if you are going to have a pitting you better come up with more than one example. I really don’t think the intent was to “pit” Lissa in the classical sense. ---
**Author:** ![kimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f0a364/32.png) [@kimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kimera)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/8 "2006-05-03T16:53:54Z")
I despise one-trick ponies, but I never noticed this with Lissa. I love her posts, even though we disagree on a few things, and I will open a thread just to see what she has to say. In the example you gave, I think she had a valid reason for bringing it up because she used it to illustrate how much that we think is instinctual is culturally based. I guess I give her a pass because she actually knows what she is talking about and doesn’t do drive-bys. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/9 "2006-05-03T17:00:14Z")
I’ve definitely noticed this about **Lissa**. Not to the point where I mind,necessarily , but enough that I’ve found it curious. Does she do this perhaps for the benefit of newer members who might not know this fact about her life? Does she even realize she does it? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/10 "2006-05-03T17:16:48Z")
One trick pony? Not that I’ve seen. Further, her posts in the OP’s link were the most interesting, informative posts in the whole thread, and were not entirely off-topic. All in all, this is a very lame-asss pitting. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/11 "2006-05-03T17:19:47Z")
**"Ratel"** - you know, that made me laugh! **August** , I can find other examples, but this really isn’t an antagonistic pitting. I don’t think of her as a one-trick pony, it’s just a little irritance, and the “little-irritance” Pit thread wasn’t immediately visible, and the “New Thread” button was. Mostly, it **is** done in prison threads, and that’s fine. It isn’t so much the fact that **Lissa** brings it up reasonably often that bugs me (she’s not as bad as **Siege** , f’rex.), it’s that it’s always pretty formulaic: “My husband works in a prison and …”, “My husband , the prison guard…”. Second-hand anecdotes and second-hand experience just don’t impress me as much as first-hand (so, for instance, since QtM was mentioned, , think what it would be like if **elfbabe** often jumped into threads with “Ya know, my dad’s a prison Doctor, and here’s what _his experiences_ make _me_ think about the human condition”). **kimera** , I think that’s my problem with that thread - _she_ doesn’t work in a prison, _her husband_ does. So what she “actualluy knows” is coloured by his perceptions etc. Fine for facts about the life of a prison guard, not so much for the internal workings of the criminal mind, I reckon. Again, don’t mean to be ragging on her, but like **EE** said, I’m starting to think of her as “ **Lissa-with-the-prison-guard-husband** ”, and I’d much rather think of her as **Lissa** , full stop. Like I said, I think _her_ job is seriously cool, and I have no beef with her (I don’t have a beef with her husband’s job, either, but I think he should get his own account, ya know?). ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/12 "2006-05-03T17:24:32Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > One trick pony? Not that I’ve seen. Further, her posts in the OP’s link were the most interesting, informative posts in the whole thread, and were not entirely off-topic. All in all, this is a very lame-asss pitting. Like I said, not a flameful pitting, nor was I pitting her overall participation in that thread, just the “my husband is a the prison screw” schtick. I din’t say she was a OTP, just that that particular thing is noticeable and bugs me. That’s all. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/13 "2006-05-03T17:59:11Z")
So this is a non-pitting in the BBQ pit? ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/14 "2006-05-03T18:12:02Z")
> [@August West](#): > > So this is a non-pitting in the BBQ pit? Where should it go? You can’t say mean things in MPSIMS. Maybe IMHO? “Do you guys think Lissa mentions her husband too much?” Yeah, I see that staying out of the Pit for five, maybe ten minutes. GQ: How many times has Lissa mentioned her husband this month? GD: If Lissa stops mentioning her husband, does he still exist? CS: If a movie were made of Lissa’s life… Not every Pit has to be a Pitting of a whole person. I think Pitting a trait is fine, though like others I don’t agree that this trait is particularly bothersome. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/15 "2006-05-03T18:24:49Z")
I read **Lissa’s** post in the thread you linked to, and it made sense to me. She was not specifically addressing the topic of the thread but rather a tangent that had come up, as tangents often do in Board discussions. I didn’t find her mention of her husband’s profession to be gratuitous. Even if the OP’s point is correct, which I don’t concede, a tendency to mention one’s husband excessively strikes me at being a great example of a quirk that easily could be overlooked. Perhaps you, **Mr Dibble** , have not had the dubious honor of finding your name at the top of a Pit thread, but it isn’t pleasant, and a “friendly” advisement that others find your comments tiresome is not, in fact, very friendly. Frankly, to pit someone for something so piddling serves as more of a comment on your posting style than hers. Just for your consideration, dearie. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/16 "2006-05-03T18:41:16Z")
**Jodi!!!** damn good to see you!!! I’m still at the same email if you have it. sorry - saw the name and had to shout out! ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/17 "2006-05-03T19:17:56Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Again, don’t mean to be ragging on her, but like **EE** said, I’m starting to think of her as “ **Lissa-with-the-prison-guard-husband** ”, and I’d much rather think of her as **Lissa** , full stop. Like I said, I think _her_ job is seriously cool, and I have no beef with her (I don’t have a beef with her husband’s job, either, but I think he should get his own account, ya know?). Honestly, that sounds more like something _you_ need to deal with, than something **Lissa** needs to deal with. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/18 "2006-05-03T19:48:57Z")
The only thing that confuses me is that she has also said her husband teaches at a college. Is this somehow connected to the prison? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/19 "2006-05-03T19:58:11Z")
[Ralph Wiggum] What’s a prison? [/RW] ---
**Author:** ![Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f0a364/32.png) [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223/20 "2006-05-03T20:17:17Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > The only thing that confuses me is that she has also said her husband teaches at a college. Is this somehow connected to the prison? > > 😕 Ok, I’m not the only one who noticed that. I’ve got no interest in pitting **Lissa** , but if she drops by, I’d like to hear about that. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lissa-a-word-if-i-may/355223.md?page=2)