# Lohan's EW cover picture **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 13, 2004, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585 "2004-12-13T13:01:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2004, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/41 "2004-12-13T23:09:07Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > [Link](http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/004161.html) > > See that “ridge” that defines the outer edge of the breast? Yea…real breasts don’t have that. Shut up. Shut up! SHUT UP! I believe in snow, Miss Anna. ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2004, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/42 "2004-12-13T23:22:21Z")
> [@Troy McClure SF](#): > > So does that mean Lindsay gets a toaster oven? Unfortunately for Ms. Lohan, not unless the Gay Agenda is giving them out for helping homos “stay the course.” Because immediately after “hominahominahomina,” my first thought was, “Well, I guess that settles that. If that can’t turn me back, nothing will.” Grundy Jr. remained non-plussed by the whole business, until I got to the pictures of Colin Farrell. And yes, I do believe it’s my job to keep Cafe Society readers updated on the current state of my tumescence. More updates as the situation warrants. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/43 "2004-12-14T01:36:01Z")
> [@Krokodil](#): > > Who are the top-tier actresses these days? I’d say Gwyneth Paltrow, Kate Hudson, Anna Paquin, Natalie Portman, Alyson Hannigan, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Kirsten Dunst are on top of the heap, were part of the same child star machine as Lindsay, and don’t seem any worse for wear. Maybe it’s just her. Alyson Hannigan and Sarah Michelle Gellar are top-tier actresses? ---
**Author:** ![Lamar\_Mundane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lamar\_Mundane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamar_Mundane)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/44 "2004-12-14T01:40:16Z")
> [@Neurotik](#): > > Alyson Hannigan and Sarah Michelle Gellar are top-tier actresses? Easiest game in the world - Spot the fanboy in Cafe Society. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/45 "2004-12-14T01:48:43Z")
> [@SolGrundy](#): > > Dude, you don’t even need the disclaimer. Damn, she’s hot. I honestly can’t see how anyone – male, female, straight, gay, blind (okay, blind, sure) – could look at that cover and not do a double-take with an accompanying “hominahominahomina.” > > My conversation with my (straight) friend Alex: > Me: “Did you see the cover of the latest Entertainment Weekly?” > Alex: “No! What’s on it?” > Me: “You mean, what’s on it _now_?” What he said–we’re gay, not blind. From a purely aesthetic POV, Ms. Lohan got it goin’ on! ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/46 "2004-12-14T02:17:00Z")
> [@gobear](#): > > What he said–we’re gay, not blind. From a purely aesthetic POV, Ms. Lohan got it goin’ on! I was describing it earlier today as the “Iron Chef Syndrome.” When they get to the judging at the end of the show, all the dishes look great, but I’d never want to eat any of them. Plus it’s somewhat comforting to realize that my chances of actually ever having sex with Ms. Lohan are only _slightly_ lower due to my being a homo. So why not ogle? ---
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/47 "2004-12-14T02:18:45Z")
> [@SolGrundy](#): > > And yes, I do believe it’s my job to keep Cafe Society readers updated on the current state of my tumescence. More updates as the situation warrants. Dude! Spoiler Warning! I was waiting for that update in the newsletter! ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/48 "2004-12-14T02:38:45Z")
I don’t care about any of the rest of it. I _still_ want to be her! I wondered what the freakin’ hold up is? Mr. Wish Person to the white courtesy phone. YOU ARE NEEDED STAT! Get off the pot, will ya? I have some boobs to fill. 🙂 (Oh, and to answer the OP: of course we’re, I mean she, is hot. D’oh, that girl can’t be nothing else. Store-bought or otherwise. ;)) ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/49 "2004-12-14T02:40:34Z")
I’m very conflicted about Ms. Lohan. One the one hand, I really enjoyed her as the kid in The Parent Trap. I thought she was an adorable little freckle-faced moppet. I could certainly never entertain any impure thoughts about someone who I had seen like that. On the other hand, she’s like really freakin’ hot now. ---
**Author:** ![easy\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb8c5e/32.png) [@easy\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/easy_e)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/50 "2004-12-14T04:59:13Z")
> [@Kel Varnsen - Latex Division](#): > > But on that site it says there is no gap between breasts when a woman is standing up - what the hell are they talking about? Are they saying cleavage is just naturally there? I found that bad plastic surgery site via a link from here. One thing that drove me nuts was that very thing, as (possible TMI ahead) my very natural breasts have quite a gap between them. Is it just me, or it obvious that photo has been airbrushed? Her head looks way too big in proportion to her body, her legs seem way too long and her arms way too skinny (especially if you compare them to candid shots of her). Oh, now I sound like one of the bad-plastic-sugery-website critics. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Badge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Badge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badge)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/51 "2004-12-14T05:36:41Z")
[QUOTE=easy e] . . . my very natural breasts have quite a gap between them. QUOTE] OK. It has been at least 30 minutes since **easy e** posted the above, no one else has jumped in yet, and I _ **NEVER** _ jump into a thread at the right time for this. So here goes: **Cite?** 🙂 Thank you. I’ll be leaving now. ---
**Author:** ![edwino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@edwino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwino)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/52 "2004-12-14T06:17:40Z")
My problem with that Lohan character is that yes, she is kind of hot, but when she goes all teenage-glam-chick, she turns orange. I mean, she looks like a damn Oompa Loompa minus the eyebrows and the green hair in many of those red carpet shots. Lay off the fake tanning lotion, willya? It doesn’t go well on a redhead with a freckly complexion, apparently. [Cite](http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/2471/Events/2471/LindsayLoh_Grani_2865070_400.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Lohan,%20Lindsay) Call me a sicko, but she was much cuter in _Mean Girls_, when she was the mousy little intellectual chick who liked Ladysmith Black Mambazo. After her big makeover, she was just another plastic queen. ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/53 "2004-12-14T10:25:29Z")
Since this thread _was_ exclusively for people named Bob (which I am), I thought I’d join the conversation. She looks great on that cover: [http://www.ew.com/ew/covergallery/0,12924,785364,00.html](http://www.ew.com/ew/covergallery/0,12924,785364,00.html) (Hey, why not go to the source if you are looking for an Entertainment Weekly cover?) The only trouble I have with that lovely Lindsay photo is that she is wearing pantyhose. An “all-flesh” photo would _really_ be fantatstic and I would die a happy man !!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/54 "2004-12-14T10:51:45Z")
> [@gobear](#): > > What he said–we’re gay, not blind. From a purely aesthetic POV, Ms. Lohan got it goin’ on! Well, the parenthetical was there because I was originally going to say hetero but considering I’m bi, that would have been incorrect. And besides, I know Dopers – if I hadn’t had the parenthetical, I’d’ve had \*\*jayjay \*\*or \*\*Otto \*\*posting that they didn’t find her attractive just to be contrary. Sometimes you can’t win on this board. **edwino** : That was scary. ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/55 "2004-12-14T15:10:44Z")
I think she should go all-out to copy Ann Margret and remake “Bye Bye Birdie” (including the jiggle dance in the end credits…) ---
**Author:** ![Apos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/838e76/32.png) [@Apos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apos)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/56 "2004-12-14T15:16:13Z")
There are plenty of hawt chicks in the world, but on that same cover is evidence of why I find Ms. Lohan far too irritating to give much notice too. The whole "oh, here’s my boobs, hey all these rumors, just stop gossiping about me… oh and here’s my vagina DON’T TALK ABOUT IT I would NEVER use sex to sell my new record “I let creepy old men touch me beneath my Catholic school skirt” thing was old when Britney did it, and it’s just getting pathetic. At least when Pearl Jam bitched about the trials of fame, it was a little more sincere since no one wanted to see Vedder’s man boobs and he was a genuinely a shy guy. That these dumbass starlets act like there are any rumors about their lives that could make them at all interesting to me, whether they are true or false, whether spread by their publicist or their enemies, is just presumptuous. OMG, she had SEX with a BOY, or maybe KISSED a GIRL!!! Us older guys can be forgiven for briefly gawking at hot young thangs, but there’s nothing like realizing how juvenile and naive their preoccupations are to make you feel too ashamed to actually fantasize about them at length. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/57 "2004-12-14T15:19:48Z")
Actual headline about Lohan’s recent album in the _Globe and Mail_: LOHAN BEHOLD: STRUMPET RELEASES ALBUM ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/58 "2004-12-14T15:49:45Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > Actual headline about Lohan’s recent album in the _Globe and Mail_: > > LOHAN BEHOLD: STRUMPET RELEASES ALBUM I’m guessing that’s a chiefly British term? I’ve never heard it but I looked it up and, wow. I’m not a fan of Lohan’s or anything but that’s pretty . . . mean. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/59 "2004-12-14T16:30:26Z")
Getting back to the picture…all I can say is, habbalababbalaboomski! I _know_ I’m old enough to be her father but I’m also old enough to be the father of her best friend who’s not at home when Lindsey comes by for a visit. No, but please come in and wait. Would you like a root beer and a satin negiligee? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/54ee81/32.png) [@kka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kka)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2004, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585/60 "2004-12-14T17:15:00Z")
Am I the only one that think’s the EW cover looks like it has had a **lot** of work in Photo-Shop? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lohans-ew-cover-picture/279585.md?page=4)