# long time listener, first time caller **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 22, 2000, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155 "2000-06-22T00:42:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/41 "2000-06-22T10:50:10Z")
A point of order newbies. There are also some ‘busty blondes’ on the board also. Don’t let the redheads fool ya. To take the words from my friend Shayna, ‘you’re still a newbie until I say you aren’t a newbie any more’. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/42 "2000-06-22T11:04:27Z")
You’re not a newbie when you stop asking the question “Am I a newbie” DJ, Zuma, et al.welcome to the board As you are all lurkers, you pretty much know what goes on here, like the fact ChiefScott will flirt with anyone for brownie points. if anyone wants a test, drop into the Euro2000 thread and ask Coldfire about feltching. and for the exceptionally brave, ask him about squicking. he’d _love_ to give you an answer… oh, and Perse, "Branding Irons on your Fanny? that can be taken on _so_ many levels 😉 ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/43 "2000-06-22T11:07:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > Welcome to the board!! > > Yes you have to be a ‘newbie’. It’s a painless experience and will not last long. Shayna will give you your test, the last time I gave someone a test he got in trouble with the mods. > \*\* A Test? But I just joined tonight! I’m not ready! And who gives tests to the new _female_ memebers??? ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/44 "2000-06-22T11:20:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > A Test? But I just joined tonight! I’m not ready! And who gives tests to the new _female_ memebers??? > \*\* Hello newbie! The female tester would be me. 😃 So take off your clothes, wait in this little room and I’ll be with you shortly. (Don’t worry, this is strictly medical. I have training: my sister’s a nurse.) ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/45 "2000-06-22T11:27:43Z")
BTW, all female newbies, as your initiation, you need to send me 10 nude pix of yourself, preferably in sexually explicit poses. These are the rules, I don’t make them up. I’ll be expecting to see your links shortly. ---
**Author:** ![Tally-Ho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@Tally-Ho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tally-Ho)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/46 "2000-06-22T13:42:42Z")
A test? What test? Nobody gave me any test… \*\*Ohmygawd!!\*\*I musta missed my test! I’ve been staying up so late studying the board, taking notes about Wally’s gerbil problems, aha’s shameless brown-nosing to the mods, and how the guys flock for explicit emails by ultress. And now what good will it do me? _wanders off muttering about screwing up her GPA_ ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/47 "2000-06-22T13:50:36Z")
:sigh: I see I’m gonna have a busy day. Strip down and wait in this little room, chrisbar. I’ll be with you as soon as I finish up with TroubleAgain. Look at the post above yours and get crackin on those nekkid pix for me. So many newbies, so little time . . . ---
**Author:** ![Tally-Ho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@Tally-Ho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tally-Ho)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/48 "2000-06-22T13:56:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > :sigh: > > I see I’m gonna have a busy day. > > Strip down and wait in this little room, chrisbar. I’ll be with you as soon as I finish up with TroubleAgain. > > Look at the post above yours and get crackin on those nekkid pix for me. > > So many newbies, so little time . . . > \*\* You better hurry up, BratMan007. (looks down at her naked chest) It’s **COLD** in here! 😃 Chrisbar ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/49 "2000-06-22T14:01:45Z")
Uh, was this the place I was supposed to report for orientation? ::dumb newbie:: ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/50 "2000-06-22T14:11:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > You better hurry up, BratMan007. > (looks down at her naked chest) It’s **COLD** in here! > 😃 > \*\* I know. I set the A/C for 60 degrees for that very reason.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/779978/32.png) [@Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumba_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/51 "2000-06-22T20:50:23Z")
Ayesha - I spent all night and half the day today wondering around town half naked looking for UncleBeer. Sadly, I could not find him. Isn’t there anything else I can do?? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/52 "2000-06-22T21:17:03Z")
You could undo that third button, and the rest of the fasteners on any other clothing you may be wearing. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/53 "2000-06-22T21:18:48Z")
::Quickly purchasing airline tickets to the U.A.E. for the weekend and FedExing them to Zumba:: ---
**Author:** ![Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/779978/32.png) [@Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumba_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/54 "2000-06-22T21:26:58Z")
Anything you say UncleBeer. I will do anything to make people like me. And I always cave to peer pressure. I just want to be accepted!! _removing rest of clothes and getting on plane to U.A.E._ Where am I going anyway Chief?? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/55 "2000-06-22T21:39:14Z")
Forget the Chief. He’ ain’t allowed off the boat for a few more months. And the United Arab Emirates is way, way too hot this time of year. Far hotter than, say, Wilmington, NC. And completely off-topic, but of intensely personal interest to me, you wouldn’t happen to know anything about the Margaret (Peggy) Carr story from Wilmington a couple years ago do you? ---
**Author:** ![Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/779978/32.png) [@Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumba_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/56 "2000-06-22T21:48:40Z")
Whew! I was getting strange looks from the other people on the plane anyway. Sorry Chief, I didn’t realize that you were in the Navy. As a former Marine Corps Officer Brat I am not even sure that I am allowed to talk to you! (But I won’t tell my father if you won’t) UncleBeer - I do know some about Peggy Carr. Everyone who lived in Wilmington at the time knows her name. I did not know her personally but I did follow the story in the news. You can email me if there is something you want to know that you think I can help you with. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/57 "2000-06-22T21:56:11Z")
Look at **Beer** , already putting **Zumba** to work, slaving away on another inane research project. While I on the other hand have a deluxe suite at the _Le Meridian_ Hotel in beautiful Jebel Ali. The daquiris are chilling, the pool is cool and you are already nearly undressed. I’ve got time reserved for you at the spa, and have at ready cool, scented oils with which to rub down your achey body. And just think of all the ways you could get back at Daddy by bringing me home to meet him. ---
**Author:** ![Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/779978/32.png) [@Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumba_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/58 "2000-06-22T22:03:45Z")
That does sound tempting Chief. However, I have already put my clothes back on. I have to run down to the library before it closes and do some research for UncleBeer. I was told that he was the man I needed to make friendly with if I wanted to be accepted. Maybe tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![djwalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8edcca/32.png) [@djwalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/djwalker)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/59 "2000-06-22T22:05:42Z")
I’m reminded of a scene in “Monty Python’s Search For The Holy Grail” I feel I must storm the castle and rescue Zumba from all this peril. “Please can’t I go back and face the peril?” “No, it’s far too perilous” Dave ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2000, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155/60 "2000-06-22T22:29:37Z")
Inane? No, Peggy Carr was a very good friend of mine that moved to North Carolina and was murdered. It was several months before anything was really known about what had happened to her and her body was found. One of the killers has paid the full price though. He was shot to death by the prison guards while attempting an escape. It’s a very sad story. Wally’s death made me think again of Peggy, as all deaths do now. I’ve always wanted to find someone from Wilmington that knew her there. I only know her Toledo friends and family. I’ve always wondered how big of a story it was there. Thanks you for the kind offer, Zumba, maybe someday I’ll take you up on that. Okay, back to tormenting the newbies. And some shameless flirting. Zumba, you really **do not** want to get caught naked in an Arab country. You should stay here where we can skinny dip. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/long-time-listener-first-time-caller/23155.md?page=4)