# Look! It's the first MMP of spring!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [March 20, 2006, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111 "2006-03-20T10:24:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/121 "2006-03-22T16:43:18Z")
I’m such an MMP slacker. I haven’t kept up with the doin’s this week at all! It snowed here this week. We have daffodils up, people. This is not right! I’m all paranoid about my tulips, which are about halfway up. Here’s another Kid Cute: My 8-year-old son is going through a period of The Scairdies. That is, he’s all scared the monsters are gonna get him, so he goes through the house flipping on lights and talking real loud. Well the other night we heard this tremendous YELP and he came flying down the hall as though the demons of hell were in pursuit. Turns out, he thought they were. As he came to the bottom of the stairs, one of the straps of his backpack hooked on the doorhandle – it’s one of the lever-type – and yanked the backpack right off his back! The horror! The horror! This morning, “something” was making noises in the dining room. He wasn’t buying that his sister’s bedroom was directly above. “Nothing in her bedroom goes _poip_, Mom,” he says. Poor dear. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/122 "2006-03-22T18:06:06Z")
[QUOTE=Tupug Anachi] I may be mistaken but IIRC nursery rhymes are actually satirical commentaries on actual historical people and happenings…so does that mean they are planning on altering history?? 😕 [/QUOTE] In a very significant and meaningful sense, yes. Human beings are storytellers, that’s what we do. Our societies have rules of right and wrong, good and bad, and we communicate those rules to one another almost exclusively in a narrative form. That’s what narratives are for, really. Just think of all those fables with a moral at the end. Washington and the cherry tree. The little engine that could. Johnny Appleseed. Rip Van Winkle and the Pied Piper of Hamelin. All of these are fictional or apocryphal stories that we tell because it’s directions for how to behave ourselves. Anansi the spider. The good Samaritan. Hell, the entire Bible. All those stories in the Bible aren’t literally true, they’re symbolic morality tales. That’s what religion is, a set of "thou shall"s and "thou shalt not"s. So when some stupid sods go and change a story like Humpty Dumpty, they’re changing the social and historical fabric of society. Instead of sending a message of “don’t be an idiot, watch out for yourself,” it now sends a message of “go ahead and play, we’ll take care of you,” when everyone reading this knows that is patently absurd. Children cannot be protected forever. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/123 "2006-03-22T18:08:48Z")
The trend of **susan** and I being one in the same continues… 😃 But ☹ for feeling down on yourself. That’s never fun. Been there, done that, and the bastard didn’t even give me a t-shirt! ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/124 "2006-03-22T18:45:34Z")
yeesh - what a morning I’ve had. So hectic, I admit to not really reading any of the previous posts today. So a generic \*\*Feel Better Soon \*\* to those who are under the weather or otherwise achy; \*\*That’s really great news \*\* to those who had some to share; \*\*aw, that’s sweet/cute \*\* to the kiddy and pet stories; and \*\*Cheer up, things will get better and we still love you \*\* to whom \*that \* is appropriate. And one \*\*HUGE \*\* apology for being so generic. OY. At least the day is more than half over. I’m going to have some chicken soup and Fritos to cheer myself up. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/125 "2006-03-22T18:48:15Z")
Interesting. According to this [site](http://www.rhymes.org.uk/), [Humpty Dumpty](http://www.rhymes.org.uk/humpty_dumpty.htm) was a big gun. Who woulda thunk it. And let’s not even get started about the black sheep having anything to do with [race](http://www.rhymes.org.uk/baa_baa_black_sheep.htm). Even more odd, the web site is in the UK where the movement to make the changes originates. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/126 "2006-03-22T19:13:54Z")
I’m really hungry today. I was hungry for lunch at about 10:30, so I had one small component of my packed lunch then. It’s now 11:15 and I’m _still_ hungry. Thankfully I usually have lunch at 11:30, so if I can last another 15 minutes I can eat my lunch as usual. I have a feeling it’s going to be a loooooooooong afternoon. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/127 "2006-03-22T20:05:58Z")
Where’d everybody go??? Can I tell you something? It is SOOOOOO flakkin gorgeous outside right now I can hardly stand it. The only thing keeping me here right now is the ice cream birthday cake we’re gonna have at 4:00. It’s Neapolitan. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/128 "2006-03-22T20:12:36Z")
Just remembered… I didn’t check the end of last week’s MMP. Did \*\*MagicEyes \*\*ever check in and let us know where she’s been? I miss her! ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/129 "2006-03-22T20:34:38Z")
Preach it, **Spats!** --I hear ya and completely agree. I know parents who won’t read fairy tales to their kids, because they’re “too” scarey. They just don’t get that we (and kids) learn thru myth. Off for one more errand! ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/130 "2006-03-22T20:42:52Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] They just don’t get that we (and kids) learn thru myth. [/QUOTE] Really! How would I know to avoid old ladies handing me apples if not for fairy tales?? How would I know that if you treat your prettier stepsister like garbage and make her wait on you and generally make her life a living hell, you’ll end up getting your _eyes pecked out by birds at her wedding_??? Fairy tales are _important_. **TMI Warning: Girly Stuff Ahead** So, the possible appendicitis/ovulation pain hasn’t really gone away. It comes and goes, but it doesn’t move, and though it seems to be getting a little sharper, rather than being debilitating or incapacitating, it’s just _annoying_. After much discussion and research, my friend thinks it’s likely an ovarian cyst, and I pretty much agree. So, I have an appointment with my doctor for tomorrow afternoon, and the promise of my roommate that she’ll rush me to the emergency room should something go terribly wrong tonight. I suppose it’s the best I can do. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/131 "2006-03-22T21:36:39Z")
Update: Doctor called back himself to tell me that whatever’s going on, he feels it’s too close to my appendix to let it wait until tomorrow, so I’m going there right after work. It would really suck if I had appendicitis. I’ve never had surgery in my life. Now I’m all freaked out. This has been a bad health year thus far. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/132 "2006-03-22T21:38:12Z")
[QUOTE=Draelin] Update: Doctor called back himself to tell me that whatever’s going on, he feels it’s too close to my appendix to let it wait until tomorrow, so I’m going there right after work. It would really suck if I had appendicitis. I’ve never had surgery in my life. Now I’m all freaked out. This has been a bad health year thus far. :mad: [/QUOTE] Goodness! I hope everything is okay! I find it nice that your healthcare provider is concerned enough to bring you in NOW, rather than make you wait and wonder. ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/133 "2006-03-22T21:56:08Z")
I hope everything’s ok **Drae**. The MMP is pulling for you! ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/134 "2006-03-22T22:06:55Z")
**Drae** I ORDER you to not have appedicitis at this time. How will I ever bear the suspense, if you get hospitalized now? (I hope you’re ok). Fairy tales teach us lots and lots–the 3 Little Pigs, for example–build a sturdy house and you won’t suffer. Um, gets LOTS of sleep and someday, you might wake up to a better life. Don’t be afraid to speak up and state publicly that people in power are walking around nude. (this might get you arrested now, unles you said it in a “safe” zone). Eat porridge (whatever that is)–it’s just right! Oh, and when walking in the woods, leave a trail of bread crumbs behind you-less enviromental impact that way… I am DONE with trip errands, except for $$$$ and gas. I will do both tomorrow AM, and we leave around 3pm CST. Yay! I may not come back…hehehe. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/135 "2006-03-22T22:13:45Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] **Drae** I ORDER you to not have appedicitis at this time. How will I ever bear the suspense, if you get hospitalized now? (I hope you’re ok). [/QUOTE] The worst part is that I’m all freaked out and really want to call my Mommy, but I can’t do that to her because my brother’s _already_ in the hospital. She won’t know what state to fly to first! 🙂 But I promise that if I end up whisked off to get de-appendicised, I’ll make sure my roommate either posts or emails somebody to let the MMP know what’s up. You won’t have to go to Europe wondering. And _have fun!_ ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/136 "2006-03-22T22:20:47Z")
**Drae** - you get better right quick, okay? This could get downright scary. All my thoughts. On a lighter note, I forgot to post this earlier: > [@](#): > > Sausage \SAW-sihj \ noun > Definition: A sausage consists of ground meat (and sometimes other animal parts), herbs and spices, and possibly other ingredients, generally packed in a casing (traditionally the intestine of the animal, though now often synthetic), and preserved in some way, often by curing or smoking. > Example sentence: The old wise man in the village was highly regarded for his ability to dispense sausage advice. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/137 "2006-03-22T22:22:00Z")
\*\*Drae \*\* - maybe it’s just a nasty case of gas - but whatever it is, better to find out now and have it taken care of before it becomes something scary. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/138 "2006-03-22T22:31:55Z")
[QUOTE=Draelin] The worst part is that I’m all freaked out and really want to call my Mommy, but I can’t do that to her because my brother’s _already_ in the hospital. She won’t know what state to fly to first! 🙂 [/QUOTE] Chicken pox can be ugly in an adult–I also hope all goes well for your brother. I’ve never had chicken pox, either–but IMO, my mother missed my case or something. 2 of my 3 kids had it, and I never got a thing. I’ve taken care of any number of shingles pts at work, and bupkus, so…With 5 kids, all under the age of 5, I’ll bet my mom overlooked mine. Off to feed the birds and water the plants etc. I’m FINALLY getting excited! We all plan on sleeping in tomorrow (I can never sleep on a plane). I am babbling on, so buh-bye… ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2006, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/139 "2006-03-23T01:09:13Z")
I ended up calling my Mommy anyway–but I asked about my brother first. He’s home, he’s still got the pox and not shingles thankfully, and they tested him for mono, strep, and scarlet fever while he was there just to cover all their bases. He wishes he were dead, but things seem to be going fine. I am the proud owner of not one, but _two_ ovarian cysts, and my gynecologist is mightily impressed with my friend Keri’s diagnostic abilities (especially since she diagnosed me from 400 miles away). They measure 5.7 and 2.4 respectively (the cysts, not Keri’s diagnostic abilities, and I don’t know what the unit is on that, but I’m guessing it’s centimeters, because I heard him say the unimportant, run-of-the-mill, garden-variety cyst on my left ovary was 16 millimeters and these are a _hell_ of a lot bigger than that) and they’re all jammed up next to each other. I have to go get a cat scan, and then we’ll decide how to proceed, but they’re not life-threatening, and they’re honestly not painful enough to slow me down now that I know they’re not going to _kill_ me at any moment. They may have to be removed surgically, and they may burst which would be bad, but I’m a lot less worried than I was on my way in. As a matter of interest, I would like to mention that I was unaware of the fact that there is more than one kind of ultrasound. I’d been hoping for the happy expectant-mother belly-roller mammer-jammer, but as it turns out, there’s one that gets there by a more … direct … route. And that’s all I’ll say about that. I did make the doctor and the nurse laugh, though. He was pointing out landmarks on the ultrasound on the monitor for me, and he said “There’s your uterus.” I replied “It’s empty, right?” They thought that was hilarious. I guess they don’t get a lot of humor during a pelvic exam. ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2006, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111/140 "2006-03-23T01:35:18Z")
Ouch…that sounds like it could hurt. I was afraid it would be your appendix. One of my friends had very similar pain a few weeks ago and - after we had both concluded that it couldn’t be her appendix because it didn’t hurt enough - out came her appendix. Well with some help from a surgeon. Apparently she should have been talking to your friend Keri. At least this way you can plan the treatment. (Do you have paid sick leave for the current job? That would seem to be an important consideration…) Oh, and your empty uterus line cracked me up too… Trying not to think about the ultrasound. Trying REALLY hard. Glad your brother’s doing well, too. Which reminds me - I’d meant to post earlier in the week that it was nice that **FCD** seemed to be doing better. Yay! **Shibb** , your kid stories are always amazing to me. You have a right to be a proud papa - they seem like really neat and interesting people! And they’re still babies, practically. Liked the ScairdyCherry story too. I was a total scairdy-cat as a kid. I had whole fantasies - dreams even - about the contents of our basement and the secret passage that led from the storage room to…??? (I was too scared to find out. Or maybe it was so scary that I’m repressing the memory.) Hadn’t thought about that in a long time. Well…I’ve got a full-day meeting tomorrow. It’s a planning meeting where actual work will be done, so I’m sure it will be exhausting. Guess I should consider winding down for the day. I’ve been up and very awake since 5:00 a.m. and I’m going in to work early, so tomorrow won’t be much different. Is it Friday yet? Hi to everyone I’ve missed… GT [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-its-the-first-mmp-of-spring/349111.md?page=8)