# Look Jerk. Don't ever cook me a DEAD lobster again. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 9, 2003, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520 "2003-09-09T14:09:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/1 "2003-09-09T14:09:11Z")
So the tourists are finally gone and Mrs.P and I decided we wanted some seafood…We get to one of the best places in town, I notice a new cook behind the line. We order, I crack my Heinekin, and the lobster comes out looking nice. I crack into it, dip it in the ol’cholesterol and munch. :eek: :mad: :eek: I’m not some tourist geeking around with a camera, asking, “So does the water go all the way around that Island?” I’m a local. And have been for my entire life. Furthermore I grew up on the coast. I know all the tricks of the trade when it comes to faking seafood. Don’t fuck with me. There are some idots out there who use a circular cookie cutter to imitate scallops by cutting up skates. There are other assholes who swap out real King Crab legs for Snow crab legs and say they are the same. But not you Mr.Fuck, you go beyond the threshold for smarmyness! You cook up a lobster that you know was already dead, and expect a local to think you just culled it from your tanks. FUCK YOU AND THE PORTUGUESE FISHING BOAT YOU HIJACKED YOU LOWLY FUCKING BASTARD. Fuck with a tourist if you want to, but labor day is over, the locals are back. [grumble] thought I wouldn’t know the difference between eating a lobster that was alive before the pot and one that was dead…bastard[/grumble] ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/2 "2003-09-09T14:14:55Z")
And besides, dead lobster is a breeding ground for all sorts of bacterial nasties. Even if they’re refrigerated right after they die, they could be harmful if eaten. Rat the bugger out to the local Health Department, I say. ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/3 "2003-09-09T14:15:37Z")
Just out of curiousity what is the difference? ---
**Author:** ![Anonymous\_Coward](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/94ad74/32.png) [@Anonymous\_Coward](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anonymous_Coward)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/4 "2003-09-09T14:16:58Z")
Nice rant, but how can you tell? Texture? Taste? I do my lobster munching at home, where no one cares how far the lobster juice squirts 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/5 "2003-09-09T14:18:23Z")
So…did you complain? ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/6 "2003-09-09T14:51:20Z")
Yes, you can tell by the texture and some of the taste. The lobster should have some degree of toughness, and taste should have a slight nip to it. **I did not say the lobster should be tough** But firm, and nice. Yes, I got another one. I picked it directly out of the tank. I didn’t approach the cook, but I looked at him when he placed the new one in the steamer. I could tell he knew that I knew what he did. I mean geez, there were 8 people eating on the deck. He was not slammed, and the tanks had at least 400 lobsters in them. What some people will to to save a buck. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/7 "2003-09-09T14:59:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spiff \* > \*\*And besides, dead lobster is a breeding ground for all sorts of bacterial nasties. Even if they’re refrigerated right after they die, they could be harmful if eaten. > \*\* Is is more harmful than cooking a dead crab or other seafood that is normally cooked dead? If so, then why? And wouldn’t cooking kill the bacteria, like in other foods? ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/8 "2003-09-09T15:09:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Revtim \* > \*\*And wouldn’t cooking kill the bacteria, like in other foods? \*\* Yes, but it wouldn’t kill the toxins the bacteria produced while alive. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/9 "2003-09-09T15:19:16Z")
Are these toxins a greater risk with lobster than say, crab, which is often cooked dead? ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/10 "2003-09-09T15:22:14Z")
What **Tapioca Dextrin** said. The _Boston Globe_ had [this](http://www.boston.com/globe/search/stories/health/how_and_why/052096_1.htm) to say about the matter of eating dead lobsters. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/11 "2003-09-09T15:23:52Z")
Despite the talk of toxins and bacteria, this thread is making me drool. Mmm, lobster. The best lobster I ever had was a spiny lobster in Bermuda. Fucking fabulous./hijack. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/12 "2003-09-09T15:46:13Z")
Yep the spinys are good down there. My wife and I stayed at a place for a second honeymoon where on the first night they grilled out on our porch - private chef - 4 huge spiny lobster tails:) with monstrous Tiger Prawns on the side. We had fun that evening;) ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/13 "2003-09-09T17:29:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Revtim \* > \*\*Are these toxins a greater risk with lobster than say, crab, which is often cooked dead? \*\* Dunno about you, but when we steam crabs, they’re definitely alive and scrambling. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/14 "2003-09-09T17:30:38Z")
So. Lemme ask this of some people who apparently know lobster. I’ve always wanted to boil the thing in butter, 'stead a the usual water. Can this be done? ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/15 "2003-09-09T17:37:15Z")
Absolutely **Unca**! Don’t forget it’s butter i.e. Oil - essentially you’d be frying them. But yes I have seen it done in a Turkey Frier. The timing is much different, instead of 15-20 it’s like 8. If that. do a test with just claws first if you try. mmmmmmm!!! Buuuuuter!!! ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/16 "2003-09-09T18:02:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Revtim \* > \*\*Are these toxins a greater risk with lobster than say, crab, which is often cooked dead? \*\* As **FairyChatMom** said, when you cook crabs, they should always be alive. When you steam them, they MUST be steamed alive. It’s a rule that you always throw out any that are already dead. Eating a crab that was dead when it was steamed will make you very, very sick. ---
**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/17 "2003-09-09T18:09:21Z")
Actually, you _can_ cook dead lobster _if you kill it **immediately** before cooking it_\*. You slip the blade of a heavy knive into a small slot behind the lobster’s head, and split the entire thing in two. Suitable for baking or broiling the lobster. ---
**Author:** ![belladonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc29f/32.png) [@belladonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/belladonna)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/18 "2003-09-09T18:37:36Z")
Not to rain on all you seafood lover’s parade, but this thread has me feeling horribly sorry for lobsters. ☹ Boiled alive or stabbed in the brain with a big ol’ knife. Sucks to be them. ---
**Author:** ![Orbifold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/779978/32.png) [@Orbifold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orbifold)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/19 "2003-09-09T19:07:45Z")
Well, if you’re that concerned you can also kill your lobsters by sticking them in a pan and chilling them in a freezer for 15 to 20 minutes, so they just go quietly to sleep. So says Alton Brown, anyway. Or (his other suggestion) you can just think of them as really big (tasty) bugs. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/20 "2003-09-09T19:14:04Z")
Hey, if God didn’t want us to boil them bastards alive, he wouldn’t have made them taste so good. That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520.md?page=2)