# Look Jerk. Don't ever cook me a DEAD lobster again. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 9, 2003, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520 "2003-09-09T14:09:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/21 "2003-09-09T19:41:26Z")
I never, ever have cooked crab or lobster, as I guess you might have guessed. I simply don’t care for shellfish. Can it be said for pretty much all shellfish that you should cook them live (or seconds after killing them), or you run the risk of these toxins? ---
**Author:** ![Palo\_Verde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@Palo\_Verde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palo_Verde)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/22 "2003-09-09T19:55:42Z")
**Phlosphr** I you don’t mind my asking, where do you live? What I wouldn’t give for a nice, fresh lobster… ---
**Author:** ![Qazzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/aeb1de/32.png) [@Qazzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qazzz)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/23 "2003-09-09T20:00:17Z")
Same thing, I’ve found, with puppy dogs. Gotta eat em minutes after they die. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/24 "2003-09-09T20:09:14Z")
_Originally posted by belladonna_ > [@](#): > > this thread has me feeling horribly sorry for lobsters I’m so glad it wasn’t just me! Even when I ate meat, I don’t see myself looking into a big tank and saying, “That one! Send that one to a horrible death!” Hope I don’t come off as a sanctimonious bitch, but hey, I am what I am.😉 ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/25 "2003-09-09T20:11:21Z")
Out here, all crab is dead in the stores. People cook them all day and all night long all year long without getting sick… Sam ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/26 "2003-09-09T20:15:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dung Beetle \* > \*\*_Originally posted by belladonna_ > > I’m so glad it wasn’t just me! Even when I ate meat, I don’t see myself looking into a big tank and saying, “That one! Send that one to a horrible death!” > \*\* But that’s the best part! ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/27 "2003-09-09T20:24:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GaWd \* > \*\*Out here, all crab is dead in the stores. People cook them all day and all night long all year long without getting sick… > > Sam \*\* I imagine the internal organs (the naughty toxin-generators) have been removed just after they were killed, though. In other words, they’re clean, dead crabs. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/28 "2003-09-09T20:30:47Z")
> [@](#): > > But that’s the best part! Well, yeah, if they were _people._ I kid. Really. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/29 "2003-09-09T20:43:02Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Miller_ > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by belladonna \* > > \*\*Not to rain on all you seafood lover’s parade, but this thread has me feeling horribly sorry for lobsters. > > > > Boiled alive or stabbed in the brain with a big ol’ knife. Sucks to be them. > > But that’s the best part!\*\* [Richard Jeni, as Caesar] “Bring me the brown one, he amuses me. The impertinent one on the right, SIEZE HIM!!” [/RJaC] ---
**Author:** ![paperbackwriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@paperbackwriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paperbackwriter)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/30 "2003-09-09T20:47:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Phlosphr \* > \*\*Yes, you can tell by the texture and some of the taste. The lobster should have some degree of toughness, and taste should have a slight nip to it. > > **I did not say the lobster should be tough** > > But firm, and nice. Yes, I got another one. I picked it directly out of the tank. I didn’t approach the cook, but I looked at him when he placed the new one in the steamer. I could tell he knew that I knew what he did. I mean geez, there were 8 people eating on the deck. He was not slammed, and the tanks had at least 400 lobsters in them. What some people will to to save a buck. 😕 \*\* I’m guessing that you went to Abbott’s, right? Fabulous place (generally). Took our Czech friend there once, it was the first time she’d had lobster, or any really fresh seafood. Great fresh seafood makes me really appreciate New England. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/31 "2003-09-09T20:57:32Z")
Julia Child once showed how to kill a lobster without the hassle of boiling the big pot of water - she wrapped it in some waxed paper and threw it in the microwave for a couple of minutes. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/32 "2003-09-09T21:38:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GaWd \* > \*\*Out here, all crab is dead in the stores. People cook them all day and all night long all year long without getting sick… > > Sam \*\* Are the shells on these crabs orange or red? If so, they’ve already been cooked. I know snow crab and king crab are cooked on the ships as soon as they are caught. The only uncooked, non-alive crabs I’ve ever seen for sale are soft-shell blue crabs. Not that I’ve seen every kind of crab ever offered for sale… ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/33 "2003-09-09T21:41:15Z")
**Paperbackwriter** - you know, sometimes I forget you live in CT and then you come out with something like, “I bet you went to Abbotts” and I nearly freak out. Thank you for the nice freak-out this evening 🙂 Actually we were at Abbotts, they are only open for a few more weeks and we needed to be there without the crowds. Maybe a Connecticut Dopefest is in order. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/34 "2003-09-09T21:43:13Z")
I see the difference, thanks. I believe all of these are pre-cooked…I’m not a crab person, but I understand. Sam ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/35 "2003-09-09T22:50:22Z")
I’ve recently acquired the taste for Lobster on my last trip to the East, Ogunquit Maine specifically, and now I can not get enough of the critters. That said, the way the things are cooked bothers me. This has been a neat little lesson about crusteaceans, that, I discover I’m more apt to simply enjoy at Hurricane in perkins cove, than I am to cook at home. [shudder] Armed with this information, I’ll be sure to scrutinize the critters more thoroughly next time. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/36 "2003-09-10T01:45:38Z")
When I was last in Halifax, I saw severl dozen lobster in a crowded tank. _That_ made me feel so sorry for them (as compard to the quick death) that I couldn’t eat lobster for almost a year. (Oh, the guilt.) I went out to dinner with my former landlord once. We ordered some lobster that turned out to be very mediocre and not very flavourful. “Bob” dipped a piece in the melted butter, popped it in his mouth and said “Hm. Tastes like popcorn!” Damn him! Damn him to hell! I can not eat lobster now without thinking "You know, it kinda does taste like popcorn… " GAH!!! Good lobster, fresh from the sea lobster does _not_ taste like popcorn, but dammit! Now I always think that! ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/37 "2003-09-10T12:52:44Z")
Interesting Lobster Factoid: The first lobster’s the colonists encountered were HUGE, as in three plus feet across weighing sometimes 40-50 pounds or 3-4 stone. Apparently the Indigenous peoples didn’t like them… No cite - because I heard it from a actor at Plymouth Plantation… ---
**Author:** ![Computer\_Guru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Computer\_Guru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Computer_Guru)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/38 "2003-09-10T13:10:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Phlosphr \* > \*\*So the tourists are finally gone and Mrs.P and I decided we wanted some seafood…We get to one of the best places in town, I notice a new cook behind the line. We order, I crack my Heinekin, and the lobster comes out looking nice. I crack into it, dip it in the ol’cholesterol and munch. :eek: :mad: :eek: > > I’m not some tourist geeking around with a camera, asking, “So does the water go all the way around that Island?” > > I’m a local. And have been for my entire life. Furthermore I grew up on the coast. I know all the tricks of the trade when it comes to faking seafood. Don’t fuck with me. There are some idots out there who use a circular cookie cutter to imitate scallops by cutting up skates. There are other assholes who swap out real King Crab legs for Snow crab legs and say they are the same. But not you Mr.Fuck, you go beyond the threshold for smarmyness! You cook up a lobster that you know was already dead, and expect a local to think you just culled it from your tanks. > > FUCK YOU AND THE PORTUGUESE FISHING BOAT YOU HIJACKED YOU LOWLY FUCKING BASTARD. > > Fuck with a tourist if you want to, but labor day is over, the locals are back. > > [grumble] thought I wouldn’t know the difference between eating a lobster that was alive before the pot and one that was dead…bastard[/grumble] \*\* Remind me not to eat at seafood restaurants anymore. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/39 "2003-09-10T15:22:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Absolutely Unca! Don’t forget it’s butter i.e. Oil - essentially you’d be frying them. But yes I have seen it done in a Turkey Frier. Sweet. I’m gonna have to try that. > [@](#): > > Interesting Lobster Factoid: The first lobster’s the colonists encountered were HUGE, as in three plus feet across weighing sometimes 40-50 pounds or 3-4 stone. I actually saw one in that size range a few years ago. On the fishing docks in Newport, RI. The guys there said it was 37 pounds. [World Record Lobster](http://www.chilipaper.com/FWharf/Lobster/Lobster_FAQ/lobster_faq.htm#5) ---
**Author:** ![Kaspar\_Hauser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b3f665/32.png) [@Kaspar\_Hauser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaspar_Hauser)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520/40 "2003-09-10T17:04:56Z")
What about if you buy just the lobster tails? Are they safe? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/look-jerk-dont-ever-cook-me-a-dead-lobster-again/200520.md?page=3)