# Lookism: Should beautiful people get more breaks because they beautify the world?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073>\
**Category:** Great Debates\
**Created:** [May 4, 2003, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073 "2003-05-04T21:05:27Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 4

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Damuri\_Ajashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Damuri\_Ajashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damuri_Ajashi)\
**Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073/61 "2010-12-22T19:00:02Z")

</div>

> [@yosemite](#):
>
> All I can say is that lookism exists, and in some cases, it’s fine. I mean, we all get treated a little nicer based on our looks, at once in a while. (Everyone’s tastes differ, and one person’s “average” is another person’s “very attractive”.) But if someone is truly so good looking that they get preferential treatment A LOT, and they start to rely on it, they’re setting themselves up for a grave disappointment later in life. As they age, they won’t have that fresh blush of youth, and lookists are often agists as well. And then these beautiful people who have lived well because of their looks will start to be treated just like any other mere mortal. Sucks to be them. They aren’t used to being treated like an “average” person. Boo hoo hoo. (As you can see, I have a _great_ deal of sympathy for the person who is shocked because they can no longer skid by on their looks. :rolleyes: )

When I was young, I dressed well, groomed myself and worked out and played a lot of sports. I was incredibly selfish and shallow but I got good grades, a good job and made good money. I think I got past a lot of job interviews based at least partly on appearance.

Now I am older and I don’t get hit on nearly as much as I used to but the change came gradually. It came gradually enough that I could adjust.

If you are getting by purely on good looks then life will suck for you. You can only be a stripper or a bartender for so long before you get replaced by younger people but looks provide an advantage in all areas of life. The same is true of height.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![HRoark43](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/bc8723/32.png) [@HRoark43](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HRoark43)\
**Post date:** [December 23, 2010, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073/62 "2010-12-23T03:27:34Z")

</div>

> [@yosemite](#):
>
> Wow. I was horrified by that article. Women would only date a short man if the tall men she had to choose from were criminals or child molestors? That’s crazy!

So what now, is a woman supposed to go with a guy she’s not attracted to? It’s not crazy, it’s nature. Why don’t you say the same thing about how guys avoid dating fat women? Or older women?

> [@](#):
>
> I grew up with lookism. I’m one of the “have nots”. I saw how it was when you _weren’t_ one of the beautiful people. It sucks. I think it’s especially bad in S. California. One of my friends moved to L.A. from Seattle, and was immediately shocked by the “lookism” in L.A. (He’s a nice-looking guy as far as I’m concerned, but he’s 5’7", and some might consider his looks “average”.) He’d not been treated with that level of prejudice in Seattle, he said. I remember him taping a similar news story (as cited in the OP) on TV, because it really hit home for him.

Not trying to be mean, but if he feels put upon by this lookism/heightism maybe he should go back to Seattle?

> [@](#):
>
> I have another friend (a 6’3" man) who doesn’t know what I’m talking about. He says that the “lookism” prejudice I’ve witnessed is all in my imagination.
> 
> All I can say is that lookism exists, and in some cases, it’s fine. I mean, we all get treated a little nicer based on our looks, at once in a while. (Everyone’s tastes differ, and one person’s “average” is another person’s “very attractive”.) But if someone is truly so good looking that they get preferential treatment A LOT, and they start to rely on it, they’re setting themselves up for a grave disappointment later in life. As they age, they won’t have that fresh blush of youth, and lookists are often agists as well. And then these beautiful people who have lived well because of their looks will start to be treated just like any other mere mortal. Sucks to be them. They aren’t used to being treated like an “average” person. Boo hoo hoo. (As you can see, I have a _great_ deal of sympathy for the person who is shocked because they can no longer skid by on their looks. :rolleyes: )

The solution to this is obvious. Move away from people who are driven by superficial attraction.

Sorry if that sounds simplistic…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![HRoark43](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/bc8723/32.png) [@HRoark43](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HRoark43)\
**Post date:** [December 23, 2010, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073/63 "2010-12-23T03:34:19Z")

</div>

> [@Nisha](#):
>
> I’ve been reading the various posts in this thread, in a particularly free moment, and all I have to say is PLEASE. Before you all embark on your freewheeling love affair with mediocrity, Imagine what your average, day to day existence would be without competence, brilliance and beauty. Beauty isn’t solely about the physical form— it’s in anything done extremely well. Would you want to live in a building constructed by mediocre plumbers and electricians?

Huh? The whole mediocre plumbers and electricians thing is an issue of skill. We’re talking about looks. The two are not the same. Why even bring that up?

> [@](#):
>
> Would you want to… Agh, as I’m typing this I realize that the day to day experience of mediocrity must be maddening and is sure to cause a lot of suffering… And that’s where the evil part comes in… beauty, whether it be physical, mental, or otherwise is not a guarantee against a life of suffering, but my instincts lead me to hope, if not believe, that the possession of it in any form goes towards not only relieving it’s bearer of some of the potential weight of life, but also potentially, go towards relieving the suffering of mankind in general. Beauty, no matter how rare, points towards the possibility or potentiality of a better existence. Any person who begrudged this is simply admitting their own inability to wish for something more than their own personal happiness. I am a beautiful woman, and trust me, the world is a difficult place to live in for the beautiful. That is why we congregate in groups, certain cities. That is why we can be cold and distant. what people want to. “do” for a beautiful person often is simply what they want the beautiful person to do for THEM… somehow make up for the inevitable differences we all experience.

You congregate around other beautiful people to the exclusion of others? Wow. You’re going to have such a huge rude awakening when your looks fade. At least if Yosemite chooses to move among those who are less obsessed with looks, the future holds something bright for him/her. You’re headed headlong into a future where you’ll be drummed out of your elite little beautiful circle when you get old.

I hope you have some kind of entrepreneurial skill to rely on when that day comes.

> [@](#):
>
> And finally, if you can not find it in your heart to appreciate beauty, then perhaps you should consider leaving the planet earth

Wow, not even I am this heartless. Is (implied) telling people who disagree with you to commit suicide even allowed on SDMB?

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lookism-should-beautiful-people-get-more-breaks-because-they-beautify-the-world/173073.md?page=3)
