# Loopy Limericks **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 8, 2015, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149 "2015-02-08T21:37:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 352
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7030 "2025-07-25T04:46:35Z")
I was told I need to touch grass So I sat on it with my bare ass The lush, greeny turf ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7031 "2025-07-25T05:47:11Z")
I was told I need to touch grass So I sat on it with my bare ass The lush, greeny turf –Wait! that’s Astro-- or Nerf! ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7032 "2025-07-25T10:40:01Z")
I was told I need to touch grass So I sat on it with my bare ass The lush, greeny turf –Wait! that’s Astro-- or Nerf! At any rate it gave me a rash * * * I don’t trust anyone younger than me ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7033 "2025-07-25T14:15:05Z")
I don’t trust anyone younger than me Ever since I turned seventy three ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7034 "2025-07-25T15:34:24Z")
I don’t trust anyone younger than me Ever since I turned seventy three Now it’s “Git off ma lawn!” ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2025, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7035 "2025-07-25T16:24:21Z")
I don’t trust anyone younger than me Ever since I turned seventy three Now it’s “Git off ma lawn!” and from dusk until dawn ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7036 "2025-07-26T00:49:12Z")
I don’t trust anyone younger than me Ever since I turned seventy three Now it’s “Git off ma lawn!” and from dusk until dawn I eat nothing but mushy green peas There once was a spider named Legs ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7037 "2025-07-26T02:01:46Z")
There once was a spider named Legs. She prodigiously produced spider eggs. ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7038 "2025-07-26T02:06:43Z")
There once was a spider named Legs. She prodigiously produced spider eggs Which she fried over easy ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7039 "2025-07-26T02:21:41Z")
There once was a spider named Legs. She prodigiously produced spider eggs Which she fried over easy That made her husband queasy ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7040 "2025-07-26T02:34:16Z")
There once was a spider named Legs. She prodigiously produced spider eggs Which she fried over easy That made her husband queasy As he had to settle for the dregs * * * My girlfriend has legs up to here ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7041 "2025-07-26T04:08:23Z")
My girlfriend has legs up to here (That is to say, up to her rear) ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7042 "2025-07-26T06:27:55Z")
My girlfriend has legs up to here (That is to say, up to her rear) So when she puts on high heels ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7043 "2025-07-26T10:49:10Z")
My girlfriend has legs up to here (That is to say, up to her rear) So when she puts on high heels My libido, it reels! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7044 "2025-07-26T13:01:54Z")
My girlfriend has legs up to here (That is to say, up to her rear) So when she puts on high heels My libido, it reels! Fortunately, for her I have the gear * * * Nothing beats shifting six on the floor ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7045 "2025-07-26T18:14:49Z")
Nothing beats shifting six on the floor If I could I’d even shift a few more ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2025, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7046 "2025-07-26T21:46:38Z")
Nothing beats shifting six on the floor If I could I’d even shift a few more How I wish an EV ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2025, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7047 "2025-07-27T00:37:27Z")
Nothing beats shifting six on the floor If I could I’d even shift a few more How I wish an EV Could be so speedy ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2025, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7048 "2025-07-27T01:16:20Z")
Nothing beats shifting six on the floor If I could I’d even shift a few more How I wish an EV Could be so speedy As a Tesla blows by (sans the roar) ———————————————— My testicles hang down to my knees ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2025, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7049 "2025-07-27T02:35:56Z")
My testicles hang down to my knees And I can tell the water is 33 degrees [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149.md?page=351) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149.md?page=353)