# Loopy Limericks **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 8, 2015, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149 "2015-02-08T21:37:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 354
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7070 "2025-07-28T06:26:04Z")
A judge with a wart had just mumbled “What a pain in the ass,” he grumbled “I can’t sit on the bench!” ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7071 "2025-07-28T12:44:36Z")
A judge with a wart had just mumbled “What a pain in the ass,” he grumbled “I can’t sit on the bench!” “And I can’t stop the stench!” ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7072 "2025-07-28T23:01:01Z")
A judge with a wart had just mumbled “What a pain in the ass,” he grumbled “I can’t sit on the bench!” “And I can’t stop the stench! The case was dismissed (so I’m told) ——————————— Every judge that I know has big warts ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7073 "2025-07-28T23:20:27Z")
Every judge that I know has big warts From sitting on a bench made of quartz ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7074 "2025-07-28T23:26:29Z")
Every judge that I know has big warts From sitting on a bench made of quartz Lancing them is futile ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7075 "2025-07-29T00:08:30Z")
Every judge that I know has big warts From sitting on a bench made of quartz Lancing them is futile At least, for awhile ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7076 "2025-07-29T01:11:40Z")
Every judge that I know has big warts From sitting on a bench made of quartz Lancing them is futile At least, for awhile And yet no one is suing for torts! The tort suit was for tarts, not for tortes. ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7077 "2025-07-29T01:28:53Z")
The tort suit was for tarts, not for tortes. The tarts were sour grape, for poor sports ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7078 "2025-07-29T02:14:14Z")
The tort suit was for tarts, not for tortes. The tarts were sour grape, for poor sports But they had a case ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7079 "2025-07-29T09:46:35Z")
The tort suit was for tarts, not for tortes. The tarts were sour grape, for poor sports But they had a case; The tarts contained mace ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 10:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7080 "2025-07-29T10:22:03Z")
The tort suit was for tarts, not for tortes. The tarts were sour grape, for poor sports But they had a case; The tarts contained mace Tarts and tortes teetered right out the ports! Have our politics gone just too far? ---
**Author:** ![2\_More\_Bits](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2_more_bits/32/4148_2.png) [@2\_More\_Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2_More_Bits)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7081 "2025-07-29T12:34:03Z")
Have our politics gone just too far? I much prefer tossing darts at the bar ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2025, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7082 "2025-07-29T13:44:51Z")
Have our politics gone just too far? I much prefer tossing darts at the bar With his face on the board ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7083 "2025-07-30T01:45:58Z")
Have our politics gone just too far? I much prefer tossing darts at the bar With his face on the board Everybody scored ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7084 "2025-07-30T02:19:00Z")
Have our politics gone just too far? I much prefer tossing darts at the bar With his face on the board Everybody scored So for everyone a cigar * * * I am married to a lovely robot [issues with the software this week won’t allow me to eliminate the space before my last line there…] ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7085 "2025-07-30T04:40:37Z")
I am married to a lovely robot You wouldn’t believe the software she’s got ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7086 "2025-07-30T11:24:13Z")
I am married to a lovely robot You wouldn’t believe the software she’s got And her hardware! oh, wow! ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7087 "2025-07-30T21:06:55Z")
I am married to a lovely robot You wouldn’t believe the software she’s got And her hardware! oh, wow! (Version 6.2 now) ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2025, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7088 "2025-07-30T23:12:14Z")
I am married to a lovely robot You wouldn’t believe the software she’s got Version 6.2 now; And her hardware! oh, wow! Truly, all my base she hath caught! Ferris-- couldn’t figure out what you meant by the space and the parentheses, other than maybe a double post, and it does make more sense with the lines arranged that way. If I’m wrong, I apologize. Feel free to rearrange and repost. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2025, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149/7089 "2025-07-31T01:37:51Z")
There is a bug in a recent update of Discourse that puts a spurious line after a hard return, tho chatter in Site Feedback seems to indicate that D. simply made the line after the hard return much “thicker.” See my post above. In any event @RivkahChaya you appear to have the perk of getting to start the next one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149.md?page=353) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/loopy-limericks/712149.md?page=355)