# LOTR: The Musical. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 17, 2005, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905 "2005-03-17T01:48:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/1 "2005-03-17T01:48:20Z")
[The news is out…](http://www.canada.com/news/national/story.html?id=523dfb13-f3a9-402d-9d15-ce16ca9b18be) So…should we go see it? ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/2 "2005-03-17T01:50:37Z")
:smack: ---
**Author:** ![RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/53a042/32.png) [@RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RancidYakButterTeaParty)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/3 "2005-03-17T01:54:52Z")
I wonder who gets the job of trying to sing Gollum’s lines? ---
**Author:** ![FellowshipoftheBling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/47e85d/32.png) [@FellowshipoftheBling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FellowshipoftheBling)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/4 "2005-03-17T01:57:01Z")
One does not simply _dance_ into Mordor! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/5 "2005-03-17T05:00:37Z")
I’ll bet Dopers could do a better job. We’ve got some poets(cue the limerick thread), and I’ve seen several song parody threads, so there’s talent there too. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/6 "2005-03-17T05:09:55Z")
Springtime For Sauron And Saruman ! Winter For Gandalf And Frieeeends … ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/7 "2005-03-17T05:50:50Z")
Gollum: Once you have found it, never let it go… ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/8 "2005-03-17T10:13:24Z")
\*There’s a bright golden ring in my pocket! There’s a bright golden ring in my pocket. Mt Doom is as high as an oliphaunts eye And it looks like I’ll go there or dying I’ll try. Oh what a strange life I’m leading, Dwarves, elves and men and young Sam. With Gollum to follow, he’s pleading “Give me back my precious!” you ham!\* ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/9 "2005-03-17T13:06:14Z")
One ring to rule them all, Eh? ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/10 "2005-03-17T13:36:16Z")
Distressin’ that a spokesperson for this endeavor thinks it’s set in “Middle Kingdom.” Hmmm. So, Pippin and Merry sing “I talk to the Trees”… ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lotr-the-musical/294905/11 "2005-03-18T22:12:26Z")
I’m upset enough with how much had to be cut from the movies (though I recognize the need). But that still gave us nine hours. I can’t imagine a musical being more than two, and they’re going to have to cut even more to make room for songs. I don’t see any way they could get even remotely close to fitting in even the bare essentials. And how the Angband did they get the rights for this, anyway?