# Love is the best thing in the world...except for a nice MLT. Mutton, lettuce and tomato... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 26, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089 "2012-02-26T23:02:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![grimpixie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@grimpixie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grimpixie)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/81 "2012-03-06T12:58:54Z")
> [@blastedoak](#): > > “you’re alive; if you want, I can fly.” Next time my hand flies on its own. Where I come from, there are penalties when a woman lies. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/82 "2012-03-06T15:37:36Z")
Get used to disappointment. 'Kay. ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/83 "2012-03-06T15:40:47Z")
Even if we had a wheelbarrow, that would be something. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/84 "2012-03-06T16:07:49Z")
I’ve got the one the Albino had. ---
**Author:** ![SticksAndString](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@SticksAndString](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SticksAndString)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/85 "2012-03-06T16:11:24Z")
Father, I need your help. I canno’ do thees alone… ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/86 "2012-03-06T17:04:42Z")
I’ll call the brute squad… ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/87 "2012-03-06T17:25:28Z")
That does put a damper on our relationship. ---
**Author:** ![Runestar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/74df32/32.png) [@Runestar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runestar)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/88 "2012-03-06T18:56:58Z")
“I’ll give you my word as a Spaniard!” “No good. I’ve known too many Spaniards.” ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/89 "2012-03-06T19:37:04Z")
You have an overdeveloped sense of vengenance. ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/90 "2012-03-06T22:43:36Z")
Now, tell me, how do you feel? And remember, this is for posterity, so please, be honest. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/91 "2012-03-06T23:03:50Z")
WTF is this thread even _about_? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/92 "2012-03-06T23:06:20Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > WTF is this thread even _about_? Have you ever considered piracy? You’d make a wonderful Dread Pirate Roberts. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2012, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/93 "2012-03-06T23:14:20Z")
Mutton dressed as lamb? ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/94 "2012-03-07T18:00:12Z")
You were not hired for your brains, you hippopotamic land mass! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/95 "2012-03-07T18:52:01Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > WTF is this thread even _about_? You have a misplaced sense of vengeance. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/96 "2012-03-07T18:57:03Z")
“And don’t go in swimming for… what, an hour?” “A good hour…” ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/97 "2012-03-07T19:13:46Z")
I want my father back, you son of a bitch! ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/98 "2012-03-07T19:28:07Z")
> [@simster](#): > > I’ll call the brute squad… I’m on the brute squad. ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/99 "2012-03-07T19:33:33Z")
I don’t suppose you could’a speed’a things up? ---
**Author:** ![Gedd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gedd/32/4938_2.png) [@Gedd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gedd)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2012, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089/100 "2012-03-07T21:17:45Z")
> [@Invisible\_Chimp](#): > > There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, it would be a pity to damage yours. That’s the line that’s heard in my house. 😉 “I don’t swim.” “I only dog paddle.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-is-the-best-thing-in-the-world-except-for-a-nice-mlt-mutton-lettuce-and-tomato/614089.md?page=6)