# Love songs with unhealthy ideas about love **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 19, 2011, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218 "2011-03-19T01:53:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/41 "2011-03-19T14:39:14Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > Dammit **Sigmagirl** , I read the whole thread and almost got to post “Lightning Strikes” 😃 Sorry, baby. I love you. I mean it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/42 "2011-03-19T14:58:59Z")
> [@Lust4Life](#): > > I would rather go blind then to see you walk away from me. > > Sick or what ? > > Plus all of those songs where the singer has to get down on his knees and pray after just SEEING a pretty face.(He hasn’t even spoken to her) > > Or a grown man bursts into tears just because he’s seen a pretty face. > > Or the man who’s going to die (not commit suicide, just die) if he and his GF break up. > > There appears to be a hell of a lot of mentally unstable people out there. Yeah, I’ve been thinking this would be a fairly short thread if it were about love songs in which both parties seemed health and stable. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/43 "2011-03-19T14:59:19Z")
I’ll always love you and make you happy, If you will only say the same. But if you leave me and love another, You’ll regret it all some day: You told me once, dear, you really loved me And no one else could come between. But now you’ve left me and love another; You have shattered all of my dreams: In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me When I awake my poor heart pains. So when you come back and make me happy I’ll forgive you dear, I’ll take all the blame. This always struck me as vaguely creepy and stalkerish. ---
**Author:** ![Molotok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Molotok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Molotok)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/44 "2011-03-19T15:06:42Z")
‘Common People’ by Pulp. I don’t think that flame will burn long. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/45 "2011-03-19T15:12:18Z")
That classic stalking song _Every Move You Make_ was once commonly played at weddings. ---
**Author:** ![Molotok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Molotok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Molotok)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/46 "2011-03-19T15:17:19Z")
‘With or Without You’ by U2. ‘nothing to win, and nothing left to lose’ =/ ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/47 "2011-03-19T15:29:29Z")
First couple of songs I thought of were Pink’s “Don’t Leave Me” and Florence Welch’s “Kiss With a Fist”. It sucks just a little bit that I love, love love the second one, cause when people really hear the lyrics they’re all 'WTF?!!" But I just really love the beat and don’t take it too literally. I am not sure this is just what the OP means, however, cause I’m not sure either song’s focus is giving off any impression that they really think it’s a healthy relationship. 😛 [Kiss With a Fist](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar4Xdt_7too) "I broke your jaw once before I spilled your blood upon the floor You broke my leg in return So sit back and watch the bed burn Love sticks Sweat drips Break the lock if it don’t fit A kick to the teeth is good for some A kiss with a fist is better then none" [Pink’s Don’t Leave Me](http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Pink+&aq=f) "How did I become so obnoxious? What is it with you that makes me act like this? I’ve never been this nasty Da da da, da da Can’t you tell that this is all just a contest? The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest But baby I don’t mean it I mean it, I promise Da da da, da da" The Pink song came out right when my then-roommate’s 16-yr old daughter was in a pretty stormy relationship with her boyfriend, and I thought it fit her perfectly. They used to literally throw furniture at each other, though I am pretty sure it was mostly the girl who started and did it; he’d try to leave and she’d chase him down the road and try to make him fight. It was…pretty fucking disconcerting, actually. Hope she got some help, cause it was the definition of unhealthy for her to be so obnoxiously violent for no real reason. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/48 "2011-03-19T17:27:38Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > I don’t mean stalker songs or deliberately creepy songs. How are we supposed to know for sure? I came in to mention Kiss With a Fist, Every Breath You Take, Nightvision Binoculars, and If I Were Invisible. The first two were already mentioned, the third failed the ‘deliberately stalker’ criterion, and so perhaps only the last one counts. ---
**Author:** ![Sakuma\_Drops](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sakuma\_Drops](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sakuma_Drops)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/49 "2011-03-19T17:42:45Z")
What I refer to as the “Wanderer/Runaround Sue Paradox” says a lot about some very outmoded views on what are acceptable relationship behaviors for men and women. “[The Wanderer](http://www.stlyrics.com/songs/d/dionandthebelmonts6461/thewanderer246219.html)” and “[Runaround Sue](http://www.stlyrics.com/songs/d/dionandthebelmonts6461/runaroundsue246212.html)” are both songs by Dion and the Belmonts. The first one features a guy (quite proudly) declaring that he’s the type “that likes to roam around” and hook up with multiple girls, some of whom _know_ that he’s not the monogomous type. The second song is the same singer warning other guys about this girl, Sue, who broke his heart because she dates a lot of people…which is what Dion said _he_ was doing in “The Wanderer”. So obviously, Dion thinks that it’s cool for him to date lots of girls, “happy as a clown”, but if Sue dates lots of guys, she’s a filthy whore and guys should “keep away” from her. Yeah. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/50 "2011-03-19T17:55:42Z")
> [@Taomist](#): > > First couple of songs I thought of were Pink’s “Don’t Leave Me” Heh, I misread that as “Pink Floyds Babe, Don’t Leave me Now”. Which has unhealthy ideas about love, but it’s not exactly meant to be a subtle love song 🙂 Actually, come to think of it, it might actually be meant as somewhat of a love song by the speaker, as he is screaming out in an (admittedly unhealthy) cry for attention, understanding, and love. Only we are meant to understand that it isn’t really a love song. ---
**Author:** ![Student\_Driver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3da27b/32.png) [@Student\_Driver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Student_Driver)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/51 "2011-03-19T18:08:52Z")
Love the song, love the singer, and I know that she’s purposefully going over the top… but all of her songs about love are a bit cracked, and I don’t doubt that there’s a seed of truth in this one. In both good and bad ways, she’s the type of girl I usually end up with. [Soko’s “I’ll Kill Her.”](http://youtu.be/nnEDSBriVXk) She meets a guy who doesn’t call her back, describes their entire non-existent relationship (down to having named their children), and describes how much she wants to kill the woman that the guy is dating instead. "i would have waited like a week or two but you never tried to reach me no, you never called me back you were dating that bleach-blonde girl if i find her, i swear, i swear… i’ll kill her, i’ll kill her she stole my future, she broke my dream i’ll kill her, i’ll kill her she stole my future when she took you away" ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/52 "2011-03-19T18:10:10Z")
There’s the Beatles’ “Run for Your Life” I’d rather see you dead little girl, than to be with another man. You better keep your head, little girl If I see you with another man You better run for your life if you can, little girl Hide your head in the sand, little girl If I see you with another man. That’s the end, little girl. The first line was actually taken from an Elvis song, but John Lennon still ended up hating the song and saying he wished he’d never written it. ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/53 "2011-03-19T18:34:11Z")
Jonathan Coulton’s "[Skullcrusher Mountain"](http://www.lyricstime.com/jonathan-coulton-skullcrusher-mountain-lyrics.html) It’s about a woman whose high standards won’t allow her to see beyond her suitor’s choice of career. Sad. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/54 "2011-03-19T18:39:01Z")
> [@Noel\_Prosequi](#): > > The Pina Colada song (Escape by Rupert Holmes). Lyrics [here](http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/thesweetestthing/escapethepinacoladasong.htm). So stuck in a 70s idea of relationship health. > > Man, bored in relationship with his wife, sees personal ad for a woman who seems to share his likes and dislikes (pina coladas, getting caught in the rain in column A, health food and yoga in column B). Woman wants to escape. Man publishes his own ad to similar effect in reply. They decide to meet. > > And when they do (big reveal here, folks) the woman who turns up is his wife all along. And they both seem to laugh about it and realise that they loved each other all along and had just forgotten about the things they shared in common. > It is hard to get one’s head around the 70s ideology that thought this was credible any more. It’s barking nuts. That’s immediately the first song that popped to my mind. I try to avoid listening to lyrics too closely for most songs, but that one has so little going for it musically, that you’re pretty much stuck with the lyrics. This is one fucked-up relationship. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/55 "2011-03-19T18:46:24Z")
> [@Sakuma\_Drops](#): > > The second song I dislike from this genre…I forget the name of it, but it features the following lyrics: It’s actually just called “If You Wanna Be Happy.” And it was the second song I thought of at this thread title, but I read it as a bit more tongue-in-cheek. You missed my favorite (spoken) line: “Say man. Hey Barry(?). Saw your wife the other day. Yeah? Yeah, she’s ugly. Yeah, she’s ugly but she sure can cook.” It’s so over-the-top I can’t help but crack up every time I hear it. ETA: I did not know this, but apparently the song is based on [this old (1934 song)](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZnNwZyaGf8) from Roaring Lion. ETA2: [Here’s another version by Roaring Lion](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpt8SvvZi9Y&feature=related), which I like a bit better. ---
**Author:** ![Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hentor_the_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/56 "2011-03-19T18:59:32Z")
Not that the song is mistaken by many, but I recall a girl in high school who thought she was giving me and my girlfriend (my wife of going on 20 years) a compliment by saying that _Landslide_ by Fleetwood Mac should be our song. I recall double- and triple-checking with her as to her meaning, because I was a little offended, but she just thought it was a lovely love song. Dolt. ---
**Author:** ![suranyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@suranyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/suranyi)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/57 "2011-03-19T19:41:58Z")
How about “Love the One You’re With”. A song that says that if you’re travelling away from your SO, you should have an affair with whoever is conveniently around you. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/58 "2011-03-19T21:42:07Z")
> [@suranyi](#): > > How about “Love the One You’re With”. A song that says that if you’re travelling away from your SO, you should have an affair with whoever is conveniently around you. Is that what that song’s about? I always thought it had a “there’s plenty of fish in the sea” type message about not pining away for someone who didn’t return your interest, but I admit I’ve never paid much attention to the lyrics. ---
**Author:** ![multimediac17](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/839c29/32.png) [@multimediac17](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/multimediac17)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2011, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/59 "2011-03-19T23:48:15Z")
"I accept and I collect upon my body The memories of your devotion I feel your fists And I know it’s out of love And I feel the whip And I know it’s out of love" - Antony & The Johnsons, ‘Fistful Of Love’ "Mr. Muscle forcing, bursting Stingy thingy into little me, me, me But just “ripple” said the cripple As my jaw dropped to the ground Smile smile It’s true I always wanted love to be Hurtful And it’s true I always wanted love to be Filled with pain And bruises Yes, so Cripple-Pig was happy Screamed “I just compeletely love you!” And there’s no rhyme or reason I’m changing like the seasons Watch! I’ll even cut off my finger It will grow back like a Starfish!" - Antony & The Johnsons, ‘Cripple & The Starfish’ The whole song fits into this category but I know I can’t post the entire lyrics so I’ll [link](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858544235/) them instead. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2011, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218/60 "2011-03-20T00:25:47Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Is there a healthy idea about love? … Yeah, IMHO it would be easier, and quicker, to list the songs with healthy ideas about love! CMC fnord! > [@koeeoaddi](#): > > Bill Withers’ [Use Me](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3hBYTkI-sE) > … > Great song, though. But, Bill makes it clear in the other lines, _… I said brother if you only knew you’d wish that you were in my shoes … … I wanna spread the news that if it feels this good getting used, … just keep on using me until you use me up … … It ain’t too bad the way you’re using me 'cause I sure am using you to do the things you do …_ He doesn’t really care about how she treats him, 'cause he’s only with her for the sex. “Don’t stick your dick in the crazy . . . unless you know you’re sticking your dick in the crazy!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/love-songs-with-unhealthy-ideas-about-love/575218.md?page=4)