# Lynn Bodoni

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [May 19, 2000, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993 "2000-05-19T18:38:08Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/61 "2000-06-02T15:43:22Z")

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what soul said

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**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/62 "2000-06-02T16:52:56Z")

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Sorry guys! I know we got a little carried away.

I’ll do my best to have no more flirting in the pit. I do solemnly swear to only curse, spit, and hurl nasty barbs at my fellow posters.

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**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/63 "2000-06-02T17:29:59Z")

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_ **Who** _ did you say would be voted biggest flirt next year, Grace?

And you thought _I_ was bad. Sheesh! This is the PIT for chrissakes!

Get your smarmy, so-sweet-I-wanna-puke butts into the nearest Motel 6 before someone takes a shotgun and puts you out of our misery. Your inappropriate behaviour in this forum, not to mention your hijacking a perfectly awful suck-up job by what was once the master of all suck-ups, aha, is outrageously unacceptable.

Lynn, I have to apologize for my friends. They must be on drugs, that’s all I can think. They’d know better if their minds weren’t so freakin’ fried.

And aha, the _least_ you could do is make a half-assed effort to provide the woman to whom you’re sucking up with the object of her desire. Pssst, I’ll give you a hint…

Lynn, oh masterful Queen of The Pit, I hereby offer you the following gift if you will welcome me to your most awesome forum - [Your Gift](http://www.godiva.com/godiva_assets/prodimg/32.jpg). I hope it provides you with many, many psychic cyber orgasms.

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**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/64 "2000-06-02T18:36:31Z")

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Listen lady, I don’t need to hear your crap. I already apologized so you can take all your mean and hurtful comments and stick 'em up your…well, you know. 😃

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Lynn, I have to apologize for my friends. They must be on drugs, that’s all I can think. They’d know better if their minds weren’t so freakin’ fried.  
> \*\*

Lynn doesn’t care. We’re like this ::Grace holds up two crossed fingers:: She’s even invited me over to help her clean the litter box. I mean only a good friend would do that right? Besides, if she gets all the bribes…I mean chocolate from all the people in the pit, she’ll need a little help eating it all.

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**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/65 "2000-06-02T18:46:28Z")

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Don’t be suggesting them Godivas…we ain’t got no Godivas here in my town…this town is so small, we don’t have a village idiot so we take turns…I think it is my week too.  
Lynn:

My hopes are that I will get a welcoming thread of my own from your goddessness of hell fire. (musing) Just think…a by god thread of my own…the other poor bastards on this board would be soooo jealous…

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**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\
**Post date:** [June 2, 2000, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/66 "2000-06-02T18:58:14Z")

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Did you know Godiva’s has a website? They even have online ordering. The miracles of the modern world, you know?!

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**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\
**Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/67 "2000-06-03T04:05:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> get a room!  
> \*\*

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> what soul said  
> \*\*

“O, beware…of jealousy;  
It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock  
The meat it feeds on”

–Othello, Act 3, scene iii

By the way, you two:

“A plague o’ both your houses!” :mad:  
–Romeo and Juliet, Act 3, scene i

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Sorry guys! I know we got a little carried away.
> 
> I’ll do my best to have no more flirting in the pit. I do solemnly swear to only curse, spit, and hurl nasty barbs at my fellow posters.  
> \*\*

Well, excuse us! We were just trying to bring a little sweetness and light into the troll infested and tempestuous BBQ Pit. To share a little of the milk of human kindness, as it were! And we succeeded:

“How far that little candle throws his beams!  
So shines a good deed in a naughty world.” 😛  
–Merchant of Venice, Act 5, scene i

I am tempted to apologize, though. Really, I am.  
Except…  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
You know what’s coming!  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
It’s not Shakespeare!  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
Wait for it!!  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
"BEING IN LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU’RE SORRY!!! 😛 😃

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**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\
**Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/68 "2000-06-03T04:45:00Z")

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–Hamlet, Act 3, scene ii

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> _ **Who** _ did you say would be voted biggest flirt next year, Grace?
> 
> And you thought _I_ was bad. Sheesh! This is the PIT for chrissakes!  
> \*\*

AHEM!

If I may quote my lady:  
(In MPSIMS-Monster104’s “words you like hearing” thread)

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Oh God, I’m cumming!!  
> I probably shouldn’t have said that here.  
> \*\*

(In IMHO–Slythe’s “Prom Queen of IMHO” thread)

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> _ **Oh God! I’m cumming!!** _
> 
> Practice makes perfect  
> \*\*

All I have to say is:  
“This is the very ecstasy of love,  
Whose violent property fordoes itself  
And leads the will to desperate undertakings  
As oft as any passion under heaven  
That does afflict our natures”  
–Hamlet, Act 2, scene i

OOPS!! WRONG CUE CARD!! :eek: 😕

Err, what I meant to say is:  
As they say in the legal field,  
“Res ipsa loquitor”

Shayna, dear, sure sounds to me like you’re trying to have an orgasm in every forum, and you’re angry that we beat you here! 😛

“Angels and ministers of grace defend us!” :eek:  
–Hamlet, Act 1, scene iv

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Get your smarmy, so-sweet-I-wanna-puke butts into the nearest Motel 6 before someone takes a shotgun and puts you out of our misery. Your inappropriate behaviour in this forum, not to mention your hijacking a perfectly awful suck-up job by what was once the master of all suck-ups, aha, is outrageously unacceptable.  
> \*\*

“Was ever woman in this humour woo’d?  
Was ever woman in this humour won?” 😉 😃 😛  
–Richard III, Act 1, scene ii

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Lynn, I have to apologize for my friends. They must be on drugs, that’s all I can think. They’d know better if their minds weren’t so freakin’ fried.  
> \*\*

“Call you that backing of your friends? A  
plague upon such backing!” 😛  
–Henry IV, Part 1, Act 2, scene iv

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**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/69 "2000-06-03T20:39:40Z")

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Dry & Grace: a “little” flirting is certainly OK- but, you have hijacked this thread all the way to Libya. And, as long as this is the PIT, and we are here: would you two get rid of those ridiculously long sigs? They take up room & waste bandwith, and are narcissistic as hell.

(mandatory butt kissing) to take the Thread back on the track: I think Lynn is a wonderful Moderator, and much too classy to deign to greet Ahoo.

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**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/70 "2000-06-04T03:56:23Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Dry & Grace: a “little” flirting is certainly OK- but, you have hijacked this thread all the way to Libya. And, as long as this is the PIT, and we are here: would you two get rid of those ridiculously long sigs? They take up room & waste bandwith, and are narcissistic as hell.  
> \*\*

Listen you little prick, if you’re gonna jump in and chastise me for my behavior at least be timely about it. While your reprimand may have been warranted at the time, it isn’t now. I apologized for my behavior in the topic YESTERDAY. Read the damn posts before you jump all over someone.

As far as my signature lines goes, I’m keeping it until someone with a little more authority asks me to change or modify it. So unless Ed Zotti raises your posting status from member to moderator you can just BITE ME!

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**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/71 "2000-06-04T07:43:11Z")

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Grace: if you apologized for your flirting, I’m sorry. But I did not see it above. In fact, I posted right after you two’s last flirt here. And about the Sig: I don’t have to be anyone but a member to ask. Like you said, if you don’t want to, I can’t make you, but you might have some thought about the other posters here. Hey, they WERE great Sigs, but you guys post a LOT, and we hafta read them over & over & over & over & over & over & over & over…

I’m not attacking you guys, in fact some of your posts have given me quite a chuckle, but lighten up.

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**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/72 "2000-06-04T09:30:06Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Dry & Grace: a “little” flirting is certainly OK- but, you have hijacked this thread all the way to Libya.  
> \*\*

But considering we were in the BBQ Pit [aka “Hell” :mad:] to be begin with, Libya’s actually an improvement! 🙂

To be serious for a second, I’ll hijack a thread on occasion (who won’t?). But I try to at least brings back on track, and a little more likely to hijack a thread that’s clearly dying out, or at least slowing down. This one definitely appeared to be slowing down/dying out, so I don’t feel too bad about it.

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> And, as long as this is the PIT, and we are here: would you two get rid of those ridiculously long sigs? They take up room & waste bandwith, and are narcissistic as hell.  
> \*\*

I admit–I like my sig. It’s a tribute to the two persons on this board that have been the nicest to me. Perhaps if more of you people were nice to me, I wouldn’t cling so desparately to my sig. [pit mode on] You know–if more of you LOUSY BASTARDS HAD WELCOMED ME, just like Aha is now trying to get Lynn Bodoni to do!! ::cleverly trying to get back on topic here:: [pit mode off]

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Grace: if you apologized for your flirting, I’m sorry. But I did not see it above.  
> …  
> I’m not attacking you guys, in fact some of your posts have given me quite a chuckle, but lighten up.  
> \*\*

She did apologize, at 9:52 am on June 2 (the post right before Shayna’s last post here)

However, I’m pretty sure Grace is joking, and didn’t mean that seriously.

However, you, my boy, have pissed ME off big time, you arrogant windbag–I’ve taken notice of your debating style in Great Debates, and I can pretty much sum up your M.O. as follows:

“He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer  
than the staple of his argument”  
–Love’s Labor Lost, Act 5, scene i

Actually, I’m kidding. I admire your debating style quite a bit. But then, as they say:

“The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.”  
–Merchant of Venice, Act 1, scene iii  
😉

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**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/73 "2000-06-04T09:54:25Z")

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Dry; welcome to the SDMB! It is nice to hear someone quote the Bard, and so aptly. You a clearly a scholar & a gentleman.  
…now get a room. 😃

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**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/74 "2000-06-04T12:38:01Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Dry; welcome to the SDMB! It is nice to hear someone quote the Bard, and so aptly. You a clearly a scholar & a gentleman.  
> …now get a room. 😃  
> \*\*

I would.

But Grace isn’t here tonight. ☹

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**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/75 "2000-06-04T14:54:46Z")

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This one definitely appeared to be slowing down/dying out, so I don’t feel too bad about it.  
Hey this thread is just getting started good.

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**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/76 "2000-06-04T15:44:12Z")

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Your request my dear, aha, has turned into a lover fest. No welcome to you from our dear Lynne. She’s too busy laughing her ass off at all the lovers in the Pit

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**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/77 "2000-06-04T17:20:28Z")

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Lynn ingnore all that kissy kissy shit and turn your thoughts towards a welcome/torchin thread that I can call my own.

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**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2000, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/78 "2000-06-05T00:56:39Z")

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You know Lynn, seeing how Aha had to sit by and watch his topic get hijacked, I think you should reward him with a welcome. He could’ve come in here and flamed me up one side and down the other but being the kind, handsome, and intelligent gentleman that he is, he didn’t do it.

So I think you should grant him the one little request. What’s one teeny tiny greeting? Just think how happy it would make him. Come on Lynn. Would ya do it? Would ya huh? Will you do it now?

How about now?

Please?!

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**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2000, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/79 "2000-06-05T01:01:46Z")

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No, don’t do it, Lynn, it is beneath you! 😃

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**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2000, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lynn-bodoni/19993/80 "2000-06-05T03:01:34Z")

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Lynn, as a high-minded, battle-scarred veteran of the SDMB I _strongly_ suggest that you ignore any whimpering importunities from aha that aren’t accompanied by quality chocolates. I mean, Godivas to start, then \*excellent Belgian chocolates, a few Swiss offerings just for variety and then some assorted samplers just for laughs.

In “value-provided” terms I believe the concept equals out to “earnest money”.

It’s _important_ to be earnest! Just ask GB Shaw!  
::duck, runs::

Besides, it’s such a great opportunity to break Hoo-ha in for the daunting task of bribing AlphaGene.

Of course this is the same man who auctioned off his wife, beloved consort and companion in life to Dr. Watson. Alpha will demand…what? Human sacrifice? Tossing a newborn litter of kittens into a volcano? _Tossing a case of Asti Spumante into a volcano?!_

The mind reels. I can’t wait to wait to watch.

Veb

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