# Machetero and Diogenes the Cynic are used cum bags **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 14, 2004, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756 "2004-11-14T20:33:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/1 "2004-11-14T20:33:18Z")
In [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=5492649) I asked for advice on what to say to my friend facing prison for sex with a minor. Were his alleged actions stupid? Yes. Were they predatory? Possibly, (though I wasn’t there so I don’t really know.) Do other citizens have the right to get outraged about this kind of incident? If they want to, sure, which is why I added this disclaimer to my OP. > [@neuroman](#): > > P.S. > Obviously my friend should not have been involved with a girl this young, but if anyone wants yell at him for that, I request that you take it straight to the Pit and keep it out of this thread. Thanks. But yet you two saw fit to shit on my thread anyway. > [@Machetero](#): > > How old is the “friend”? Quite possibly the best thing to do it let him rot like he deserves. > [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > I agree. Let’s not forget who the real victim is. A man who sexually exploits a 25 year old girl does not get any sympathy from me. This is is own fault and I wish more of these sleazeballs would go to prison. What can we deduce from this behavior? I see three possibilities. 1. You are too fucking stupid to understand the english language. Unlikely, but not impossible. 2. Your inherent shiftlessness kept you from going through the arduous task of coming all the way over here to the Pit to start a thread. However, **Diogenes** has started [eleven](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?searchid=527548) pit threads in the last two months alone, and **Machetero** is obviously aware of the Pit’s existence, having [started three threads](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?searchid=527553) here himself. Clearly you are both capable of starting a Pit thread when it suits you, which leads me to conclude that 3. You two were simply being assholes. In Diogenes’ case this is pretty old news. I’m unaware of Machetero’s previous asshole status, but he’s been branded into the herd now. When you drag your sorry hides into this pittting, I fully expect you to whinge about my friend in the linked thread. Feel free. It’s what you should have done in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Rune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e68b1a/32.png) [@Rune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rune)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/2 "2004-11-14T21:08:38Z")
What is the sexual minimum age where you are at? Here it’s 15 (or 14 I forget), so he would not be in trouble with the law here – some European countries have it lower. Fifteen, while a bit sleazy, is not a prepubescent child – this is not paedophilia. Also… Perhaps he is himself in his early twenties (…my wife is more than five years younger than me)? Perhaps he didn’t know how young she was? Perhaps she was exceptionally precocious for her age? Why, maybe they were actually in love? etc. Branding him a sleazeball worthy of nothing but rotting up in prison (or her a victim for that matter) does seem a bit excessive considering the poverty of the information given in the OP. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/3 "2004-11-14T21:16:22Z")
Cum bags? ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/4 "2004-11-14T21:24:07Z")
Yeah, what’s a cum bag? Maybe we can start yet _another_ thread about what one can do with their recently-expressed semen- your own personal handy-dandy cum bag! Just use it freely until it begins to smell, then (naturally) double-bag it in plastic grocery bags and toss it. No need to eat your own semen anymore- now that I’ve invented cum bags. Thanks!! ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/5 "2004-11-14T21:24:12Z")
> [@ParentalAdvisory](#): > > Cum bags? Yeah. Isn’t it usually scum bags? Maybe the OP forgot to hit the s key. Maybe not. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/6 "2004-11-14T21:34:23Z")
I prefer “cum bucket” as an insult. I think I heard it first in the South Park movie. ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/7 "2004-11-14T21:40:24Z")
Yeah, from the few details you’ve given, it certainly sounds like your friend might have been stupid rather then evil. Something I’m sure we can all relate to. If not personally, we’ve all had a friend or family member whose managed to make a mess of things not through ill will, but just normal, everyday, fucking up. I would certainly hope that when **Diogenes** or **Machetero** have a friend or family member who screws up, they’ll find people more comforting and much less eager to pass judgement then they themselves were. I sound like a priest. Some of that Sunday school all those years ago musta sunk in. ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/8 "2004-11-14T21:47:28Z")
Yeah. What Malodorous said. Reading the original thread, I didn’t know what to think. I usually have little tolerance for guys in such situations, (like, when they _know_ the girl is illegal and screw her anyway), but we don’t have enough information yet about that. As astro said on the other thread, the girl could have lied about her age, or looked of age (and the guy was stupid enough to _assume_ she was of age), or something like that. That wouldn’t make him evil, just very, very stupid. For that kind of stupidity I’d think he’d deserve enough of a scare so he’d never be so foolish again, but not necessarily jail time. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/9 "2004-11-14T21:49:45Z")
[Cum Bag](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=286431) ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/10 "2004-11-14T21:50:47Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > [Cum Bag](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=286431) Wait, wrong thread. [Cum Bag](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=286416) ---
**Author:** ![Metacom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecae2f/32.png) [@Metacom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Metacom)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/11 "2004-11-14T22:19:53Z")
**Neuroman** , I admire that you’re still willing to show compassion towards and empathize with your friend. I wish more people were forthcoming with those emotions when the object is, for whatever reason, a societal outcast. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/12 "2004-11-14T22:38:55Z")
😛 ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/13 "2004-11-14T22:38:56Z")
I have a friend that went to prison for 4 years for dealing drugs. We were good friends for years until he got into that, then we became friends again while he was in prison. I’d always wondered what had happened to him, as the last I’d spoken to him he’d begun the dealing and I knew he’d have trouble eventually, so I looked online and there he was, in prison. I began writing him, and he recently got out. I’ve been supportive of him and we spend a great deal of time together, in a platonic way. When he was in prison, letters and visits were _very_ important to him. I don’t know how close you are to this guy, but if you really want to make it easier for him if he does do time, those are what you can offer him. As much contact with the outside world as possible is a big deal. And his self-esteem will suffer dramatically, so any opportunity to reassure him of his value and your friendship will help. I’m trying to not think of what your friend is accused of but just give you an answer to your question. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/14 "2004-11-14T22:41:43Z")
> [@trublmakr](#): > > Yeah, what’s a cum bag? Maybe we can start yet _another_ thread about what one can do with their recently-expressed semen- your own personal handy-dandy cum bag! Just use it freely until it begins to smell, then (naturally) double-bag it in plastic grocery bags and toss it. > No need to eat your own semen anymore- now that I’ve invented cum bags. > Thanks!! If you have any girlfriends, let me know, I’ll be glad to put it in them instead of the grocery bags! ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/15 "2004-11-14T22:58:37Z")
Since you’ve had that thread closed, let me point you to a couple of books you might want to get your friend. [_Surviving in Prison_](http://www.loompanics.com/cgi-local/SoftCart.exe/cgi-local/smpagegen.exe?U+scstore+zmbl9912ffecbdec+-c+scstore.cfg+-p+40070) and [_You Are Going to Prison_](http://www.loompanics.com/cgi-local/SoftCart.exe/cgi-local/smpagegen.exe?U+scstore+zmbl9912ffecbdec+-c+scstore.cfg+-p+40083). They’ll at least give him an idea of what to expect and how to survive. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/16 "2004-11-14T23:34:07Z")
Wow! A position that child rape is wrong is a pittable offense now? Well I still don’t feel sorry for the little perv and I hope he has a very tough time in prison. I will say again what I said in the other thread, let’s not forget who the real victim is. I have no tears for sex criminals. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/17 "2004-11-14T23:40:00Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Wow! A position that child rape is wrong is a pittable offense now? Oh my god! I’ve been raped! Repeatedly. I hope those bitches fry! Oh wait, no I don’t. That’s stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/18 "2004-11-14T23:40:22Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Wow! A position that child rape is wrong is a pittable offense now? Well I still don’t feel sorry for the little perv and I hope he has a very tough time in prison. I will say again what I said in the other thread, let’s not forget who the real victim is. I have no tears for sex criminals. That’s not the point Dio. He said in the initial thread > [@neuroman](#): > > Obviously my friend should not have been involved with a girl this young, but if anyone wants yell at him for that, I request that you take it straight to the Pit and keep it out of this thread. Thanks. You disregarded that, hence the pitting. Also, since you don’t know the circumstances, you probably should get off of your high horse. For all we know, the sex was consentual. That’s not to say that I don’t think it is disgusting and stupid. I do. You just sound like a moralizing prick right now. ---
**Author:** ![stretch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@stretch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stretch)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/19 "2004-11-14T23:45:25Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Wow! A position that child rape is wrong is a pittable offense now]? Well I still don’t feel sorry for the little perv and I hope he has a very tough time in prison. I will say again what I said in the other thread, let’s not forget who the real victim is. I have no tears for sex criminals. We know you can read better than than **Dio** ; the pittable offense is purposely ignoring the OP’s request not to bitch about his friend. \*\*neuroman \*\* is asking for help in dealing with a friend who is in a difficult situtation. He specifiically asked that you not comment on the friend’s behavior in his thread but take it to the Pit if you had to comment. You disregarded the OP’s specific request–you’re an asshole. \*\*Dio \*\* and \*\*Machetero \*\* don’t know enough about the situation to determine if this is more than consensual statuatory rape or not. Cool your jets until you have more info, assholes. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2004, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756/20 "2004-11-14T23:48:57Z")
“Consensual” statutory rape is still rape. The “consent” part doesn’t mean shit. Dude is a perv and a predator who’s getting what he fucking well deserves. As to the **neuroman’s** request in the other thread, I skimmed the OP and I missed it. Sorry **neuroman** , I just didn’t see that part. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/machetero-and-diogenes-the-cynic-are-used-cum-bags/274756.md?page=2)