# Madonna, the sexy look ain't working. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 8, 2005, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633 "2005-09-08T07:21:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/21 "2005-09-08T20:43:52Z")
The following is a public service announcement: “Hi there, I’m Madonna. Just a reminder to all my male fans out there over the age of 40 to get your annual pro…ahhHHH…state exam.” ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/22 "2005-09-08T20:54:15Z")
I’m imagining flies headed for that wide-open mouth. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/23 "2005-09-08T21:36:28Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > Madonna’s slack-jawed, open-mouthed expression reminds me of the appearance of brain-damaged individuals. :eek: Maybe it’s from being with Sean Penn for so long. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/24 "2005-09-08T21:46:01Z")
Reminds me of someone trying to show you what she’s got on her tongue. Given that it’s Madonna, I don’t wanna know… ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2005, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/25 "2005-09-08T21:49:49Z")
If _Slingblade_ had been filmed with a female lead. . . ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/26 "2005-09-09T01:52:28Z")
> [@AskNott](#): > > Yeah, but one of her ex-boyfriends famously said she absolutely does not give head. Foo on Madonna! What kinda preevert doesn’t give head?! 😛 According to rjung, she does give Steve Jobs. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/27 "2005-09-09T03:08:21Z")
[I Am Sam] “Madonnuh, did you brush your teef? They don’t _sound_ brushed!” [/I Am Sam] ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/28 "2005-09-09T03:17:29Z")
Not sexy now. Never been sexy, IMHO. I’ve never found Madonna attractive in the least, and I saw those nude shots in Playboy 20 years ago. Meh. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/29 "2005-09-09T03:59:43Z")
> [@smiling bandit](#): > > It looks like she has a big gap betwen her teeth. 😃 Yeah, that was my first thought. If I’m thinking ‘she needs braces,’ it can’t be sexy. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/30 "2005-09-09T04:10:55Z")
She looks like she’s taking it from behind from this John Holmes motherfucker and it’s like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he’s digging tunnels. Now, she’s gettin’ the serious dick action and she’s feeling something she ain’t felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts her. It shouldn’t hurt her, you know her pussy should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks her it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time. You see the pain is reminding a fuck machine what it once was like to be a virgin. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/31 "2005-09-09T06:01:51Z")
How many dicks _was_ that, **astro**? 😉 Me-I’ve always thought Madonna was hot. She still is, IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/32 "2005-09-09T06:32:31Z")
Um, **astro** scares me. I hope no one falls into Madonna’s cavernous maw. Looks dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/33 "2005-09-09T16:54:48Z")
> [@Harimad-sol](#): > > Um, **astro** scares me. Just a couple of movie lines ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/34 "2005-09-10T09:53:48Z")
> [@AskNott](#): > > Yeah, but one of her ex-boyfriends famously said she absolutely does not give head. Foo on Madonna! What kinda preevert doesn’t give head?! 😛 Eh, it’s a preeversion that’s surprising preevalent. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/35 "2005-09-10T21:23:53Z")
But I’d always thought that if anyone would give head, it would be Madonna. Another idol shattered. ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/36 "2005-09-11T07:40:26Z")
**astro** , that was brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633/37 "2005-09-11T10:40:42Z")
Madonna is wonderfully entertaining. Especially, watching her fade into middle aged obscurity. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/madonna-the-sexy-look-aint-working/320633.md?page=1)