# Mahaloth sneered too soon - I present evidence.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [April 4, 2001, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763 "2001-04-04T10:15:48Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/1 "2001-04-04T10:15:48Z")
In a recent thread in the BBQ Pit, **Mahaloth** (257 posts since April 2000) asked **What do you just love about newbies?**
> [@](#):
>
> Me? I just love when newbies resurrect old threads that haven’t been posted on since August 2000 or 1999. It shows they are back dating their minds. Ain’t it cute?
>
> I love when, after reading those old posts, they ask, “Who was Wally?” They are trying to fit in.
>
> I love it when they try to post their first thread and watch it plummet to the ground with zero responses. Is that cruel? Well excuse me if I’m cruel.
>
> I love it when they try to use vB Code for the first time and they don’t preview the post, then end up with things like, excuse me[/i[ .
>
> So, what do you love about newbies?
five hours later, after many withering comments, like
> [@](#):
>
> Moderator’s Notes: I’m moving this to the Pit. I’ve searched in vain for even a hint of sarcasm or dry humor; I can’t find one, so I’m moving this thread to the Pit. - **UncleBeer**
> [@](#):
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> it seems this is meant to be condescending - \*\* Nocturne\*\*.
> [@](#):
>
> Glass houses, kiddo. AFAIC, anyone who cries about how awful “newbies” are is trying far too hard not to be seen as one. - **andros**
he claimed that his Original Post was
> [@](#):
>
> …just my lame attempt at a fun thread dying- slowly. [snip] Anyway, I’m amazed that people actually took this seriously. It was a joke! A joke, I say!
As someone who considers himself a newbie I was NOT impressed by this heavy-handed attempt to put me and my newbie chums down. So, I did some research on M’loth and his worldview as presented in his postings. May I present the fruits to you now?
And add that I wouldn’t dream of being this boring and anal, if I didn’t feel so irritated by that insensitive posting.
Over the last thirty days M’loth has started 22 threads, and posted to another 21. I concentrated on his OPs.
The majority (8) are technical questions about computer games and software. (I’m not giving links because the level of interest seems low already).
Like, \*\*How can I get a really old game to recognise my Sound Blaster? \*\*(3 replies)
**How do I get two vizualization plug-ins to run simultaneously on WinAmp?** (1 reply)
**Which is better Win Amp or Windows Media Player?** (7 replies)
And worryingly, \*\*Huge Windows 98 problems !! Please come help. \*\*(4 replies)
So largely, his contribution to fighting ignorance has been getting better value out of his software. I suppose that’s fair enough.
Although I’m uncertain of the wider value of the thread **Help me remember the name of this first-person shooter game?** (which incidentally **dwtno** , the only responder, was able to supply exactly 5 minutes later).
M’loth also has a fondness for using the boards to solve riddles heard on radio shows.
Such as \*\*Which familiar nine-letter word with the initial letters removed…,
Name the stars of Fuzzy Wuzzy…,
What were Margaret Gorman’s measurements\*\*
(trouble with posting links, so I removed them. You can find these if you want to).
Good heavens, there’s nothing wrong with any of this. Many of us enjoy the innocent trivial fun that I’m listing here, and it certainly has a role in the Boards, even if it is a minor role.
BUT there is some behaviour that is unwelcome on the boards. Perhaps a regular old-timer who smirks at the elementary mistakes of dratted newbies ought to present a better record in the area of \* asking easy questions without researching first. \*
Last Sunday he asked **Do Brazil Nuts cause hair loss?** ([http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=65894](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=65894)] ).
The first of the three replies was from **Duck Duck Goose** and provided a link. Based on other postings from her, I suspect DDG used Google and that it took her about 27 seconds to have an answer.
In the middle of last month he asked **What were Margaret Gorman’s Measurements?** ([http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=63752](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=63752))
The second poster, **cher3** used Google to identify the woman. Measurements followed promptly.
A the beginning of the month he enquired [How long does it take to get a new passport?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=62072)
How long does it take to get a new passport?
And **Arjuna34** suggested
> [@](#):
>
> You might try calling and asking how long it will take.
But most heinously, he recently enquired **Why are there24 hours in a day?** ([http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=63594](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=63594))
This query brought a response from **Irishman** within 2 hours that informed him that Cecil did, indeed, address this question, to be found in the classic Cecil column **"Who decided the day should be divided into 24 hours?"**
He didn’t check out the Cecil classics? I mean I wouldn’t mind, but he’s so condescending about me and my chums!
To put things into perspective, I thought his posting to the Cranky Letterman thread (MPSIMS) was damn interesting, his grammar question in Great Debates initiated a good discussion, despite its eccentricity of phrasing, and he often starts threads that engender some interest and life. He doesn’t often return to tend them and offer responses (well, not in the last thirty days anyway).
The exception being his thread in MPSIMS called **Help Mahaloth get onto the Mole** , when he returned after six hours to say(entire post follows)
> [@](#):
>
> [bump]
.
Finally, in the OP that upset me, the fellow said at one point:
> [@](#):
>
> I love it when they try to post their first thread and watch it plummet to the ground with zero responses. Is that cruel? Well excuse me if I’m cruel.
M’loth, I’m not trying to be cruel , but your post [Help me come up with some good debate put-downs!!\*\*](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=63758) attracted zero replies at all back in the middle of last month. Anyone can have a posting that gets ignored, can’t they?.
The final sentence of your original post in that thread is a fittingly awkward conclusion to this awkward post, written at first in a tense irritable mood, but now leaving me feeling as if I’ve crushed a butterfly on a wheel.
Sorry mate, but I think you **did** start it.
> [@](#):
>
> My friend and I have a ridiculously easy class presentation to make for a class at college. We decided instead of doing a boring, normal presentation, we would take opposing sides and exchange intellectual barbs as we speak.
>
> What are some good put downs I can throw at him during my portion of the debate? Ideally, they would focus on his brains and his ideas. My best one is this:
>
> **My friend, you have the intellectual capacity of a tube of toothpaste.**
Regretfully
Redboss
---
### Author:  [@Chrome\_Toaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chrome_Toaster)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/2 "2001-04-04T10:29:33Z")
Damn, **Redboss** I am in awe of you! I salute you!I am at a loss for adequate words.
Your research was so complete and concise, and your post was so well presenting I will give you an A+.
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### Author:  [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/3 "2001-04-04T10:42:20Z")
**Redboss** , stick around mate. We need more folks like you.
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### Author:  [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/4 "2001-04-04T10:52:12Z")
_applause_
Take a bow Redboss.
Fran
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### Author:  [@Kayeby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kayeby)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/5 "2001-04-04T12:12:49Z")
Wow … you got all the coding right and everything!
::Looks up at **Redboss** in awe::
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### Author:  [@NaughtyMe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NaughtyMe)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/6 "2001-04-04T12:48:01Z")
Thankyou for defending us, 😃
**Encore, Encore!**
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### Author:  [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/7 "2001-04-04T13:00:31Z")
Awww, come on! He was just **kidding** , you know! Silly newbie 😉
Zette
(Incidently, the “I was just kidding” defense is my favorite backpeddle. “Hey! Can’t you guys take a joke??” It does a great job of making the attitude problem one of the offended instead of the offender.)
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### Author:  [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/8 "2001-04-04T13:34:27Z")
Most impressive.
[sub]Makes note not to tick Redboss off[/sub]
Excellent research and whatnot.
[sub]Makes note to seek Redboss for board fact-finding matters[/sub]
I’d propose that you are no longer a “Newbie.”
There is that whole formula, but I think you’ve earned it.
Redboss, you’ve just become a “made” man.
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### Author:  [@It\_s\_Mr.B\_to\_you](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Mr.B_to_you)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/9 "2001-04-04T13:58:24Z")
You’re not a newbie either. You’re of the camp that has run out of things to say or contributions to make, and can only spend ENOURMOUS amounts of time “researching” someone else to hurt them.
Mahaloth didn’t hurt anyone with his comments on newbie typos, etc. Lot of people make those identical comments after typos appear.
I thought his thread was lighthearted.
Yours if full of spite, maybe even hate. It’s not pretty.
You need a new hobby. Go trace every word of a newly elected politician, so you can ruin people’s reputations in real life, if that’s what it takes to make you feel bigger.
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### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/10 "2001-04-04T14:09:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by It 's Mr. B to you \*
>
> Mahaloth didn’t hurt anyone with his comments on newbie typos, etc. Lot of people make those identical comments after typos appear.
No offense partner, but who are you to say who was hurt by Mahaloth’s post? Redboss was obviously hurt, as I would say were a lot of newbies like myself, people who are scared to post something because if they make a mistake everyone will jump all over them…and then to have a semi-newbie fan the flames is hurtful.
Good job Redboss…carry on with your bad self.
:: adjusting collar ::
jarbaby
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/11 "2001-04-04T14:12:21Z")
\
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### Author:  [@Kayeby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kayeby)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/12 "2001-04-04T14:16:39Z")
[QUOTE]
\*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*
\*\*
> [@](#):
>
> a lot of newbies like myself\*\*
Awwwww **jarbabyj** , you’re not a newbie! 601 posts? I can only _dream_ of 601 posts!
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### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/13 "2001-04-04T14:28:23Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Kayeby \*
> **jarbabyj** , you’re not a newbie! 601 posts? I can only _dream_ of 601 posts!
Well, 537 of them are nothing but crap, so I’m still a newbie intellectually 😃
jarbaby
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### Author:  [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/14 "2001-04-04T15:14:40Z")
jarbabyj,
If that’s the prerequisite then I’m still a newbie. Hell, 1400 of my posts have been pretty much the electronic equivalent of throwing feces at the passerbys while groping myself.
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### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/15 "2001-04-04T15:35:07Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Enderw24 \*
> \*\*Hell, 1400 of my posts have been pretty much the electronic equivalent of throwing feces at the passerbys while groping myself.
> \*\*
Whatever you do End, don’t confuse which hand is doing what.
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/16 "2001-04-04T15:45:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Enderw24 \*
> \*\*jarbabyj,
>
> If that’s the prerequisite then I’m still a newbie. Hell, 1400 of my posts have been pretty much the electronic equivalent of throwing feces at the passerbys while groping myself.
> \*\*
And this kind of stuff is the reason I keep coming back here 😃
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### Author:  [@Saint\_Zero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Zero)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/17 "2001-04-04T15:49:33Z")
Bravo, Dude. 🙂
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### Author:  [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/18 "2001-04-04T22:47:59Z")
> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by It 's Mr. B to you (21 posts)_
> \*\*You’re not a newbie either. You’re of the camp that has run out of things to say or contributions to make, and can only spend ENOURMOUS amounts of time “researching” someone else to hurt them.
>
> Mahaloth didn’t hurt anyone with his comments on newbie typos, etc. Lot of people make those identical comments after typos appear.
>
> I thought his thread was lighthearted.
> Yours if full of spite, maybe even hate. It’s not pretty.
> You need a new hobby. Go trace every word of a newly elected politician, so you can ruin people’s reputations in real life, if that’s what it takes to make you feel bigger. \*\*
Aren’t newbies cute when they are schmucks?
:GD&R:
Sua
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### Author:  [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)
#### Post date: [April 4, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/19 "2001-04-04T23:45:19Z")
I appreciate what people have said in support of my approach in this thread. By the time I had finished and sent it I really did feel mean and awkward, and I thought I would meet with a barrage of disapproval.
I’m sure we all know that Mahaloth probably hasn’t got a nasty bone in his body. He was just trying out a way of being funny. And that’s why I wanted to speak out.
Because unlike spiteful people and bitches who clearly try to make others uncomfortable, he didn’t seem to understand the consequences of his words.
And the fact is, if you want to hang around in the kitchen, swapping jokes with the cooks and feeling important, you had better be ready to handle the excessive warmth problem. And not live in a glass house.
I was very touched by one poster’s words.
> [@](#):
>
> Redboss was obviously hurt, as I would say were a lot of newbies like myself, people who are scared to post something because if they make a mistake everyone will jump all over them…and then to have a semi-newbie fan the flames is hurtful.
This was from the beautiful **jarbabyj** whose posts I was reading when I was still only lurking, whose contributions are always must-reads, with a warmth and sincerity I am drawn to. I thought she was an old hand; maybe some of us consider ourselves newbies for a long, long time.
Suits me.
Redboss
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### Author:  [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)
#### Post date: [April 5, 2001, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mahaloth-sneered-too-soon-i-present-evidence/60763/20 "2001-04-05T02:38:19Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zette \*
> \*\*Awww, come on! He was just **kidding** , you know! Silly newbie 😉
>
> Zette
> (Incidently, the “I was just kidding” defense is my favorite backpeddle. “Hey! Can’t you guys take a joke??” It does a great job of making the attitude problem one of the offended instead of the offender.) \*\*
Nah, he wasn’t kidding–he was performing a psychological experiment on us. 😛
A lovely rant, Redboss. 9.8.
Excuse me, my toothpaste is calling my name…
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