The “IRS” left a message on my machine, threatening arrest. My husband called me in a panic.
I told him the IRS doesn’t do things like that and to delete the message.
I really hate that people get taken in by these jerks.
I get these types of calls at work, at least once a day. As soon as it’s apparent who they are and what they want I cut them off with, “Sir, this is a federal office–” upon which they always immediately hang up. I actually have a whole speech prepared, but I’ve never once gotten past that sentence.
I paid those dudes some money. In the negative sense, that is. Every time they called me, they lost money, and they wouldn’t stop calling. I tried to tie up their lines as long as I could. It cost me nothing, but maybe I made a tiny dent in their profit. If there were more non-gullibles like me, they would have been out of business a lot sooner.
I overheard a coworker getting scammed by these guys. She was freaking out.
“What??? I owe HOW much!!! I thought I payed my taxes…there must be some mistake!”
I got her attention and said “It’s a scam. Hang up!”, but she wouldn’t listen to me. They had already reeled her in.
I couldn’t let that go on so I went up to her desk and told her to hang up the phone. She way halfway out the door to get a wire transfer (or whatever payment they were asking for) before I was able to talk some sense into her.
Are the jerkwads from America trying to steal from you, or just trying to sell you something? There is a difference, you know. Especially since they like to prey on the elderly.
You are probably referring to what I like to call “dynamic robots.” They are a computer program, with dozens of recorded, stored phrases, not unlike the telephone time programs. The program attempts to parse the recipient’s responses and play an appropriate response to make it look like you are talking to a real person.
A lot like Eliza.
With current technology, the parsing is slow, and explains the typical pauses you detect.
The next time you get one of these, try responding in a way that a real human would have no trouble figuring out what is going on, but a simple computer cannot, such as, “Once upon a time, there were three bears…”
The programs I have encountered can recognize certain words, like “computer”. If it hears that, it assumes the recipient is accusing it of being a computer – some people are hip enough to see that – and will respond with something like, “Ha! No, I’m not a computer, I just use one in my work…”
I have found that saying something like, “Computer, pick a card, any card…” or “I see a green computer at the next desk…” will elicit that kind of response.
If it can’t figure out what to do next, it may play a “Sorry to have bothered you. Have a nice day,” which is better than hanging up, I guess. Nice to see someone programmed politeness into these despicable robots.
and in teh uncanny valley, there is a human/robot hybrid
I got a call yesterday. It was mildly unsettling but I smelled a rat, and it was on my voicemail and it carried some threat of one kind or another. Thus far I’ve not received a second call. Legitimate government agencies don’t operate this way, thought debt collectors do, whether you owe them or not…:mad: :eek:
No, don’t even start that. These foreign folks know what they’re doing is wrong, and they don’t give a shit. Fuck that and fuck them. They are assholes just like American scammers. You don’t get a pass to ruin other people’s lives just because your life sucks.
This attitude that we Americans deserve whatever abuse we get from other poorer countries is bullshit liberalism run amok. And I’m a proud liberal.
Last year I received real, legitimate communication from the IRS in the form of a thick envelope. It was many pages of threatening language about money I apparently owed from a previous year. It scared the shit out of me until I reached the end. Then I went from scared to pissed off. They were claiming I owed twelve fucking dollars.
I took the envelope to my accountant. She told me that their reasoning over the interpretation of the tax code was arguable. I wrote a check for twelve dollars. After the thousands of dollars I voluntarily paid, the IRS shakedown felt like a scam.
We got a call from the scammers threatening us with arrest. My spouse dared them to send someone over, laughed at them, and hung up.
The worst, though, were the computer scam guys who kept calling back when we hung up. I mean five minutes after we hung up, not the next day. We blocked their number. No more problem.
I saw one article that said that they were making about $90,000 to $170,000 per day. Another article said “an estimated $36.5 million was extorted from U.S. residents.”
Yes, that sounds like what I have experienced, but I fail to see why the human needs to be involved at all, as that article suggests. I think they just let the robot handle everything – it’s cheaper – at least up until the robot reaches its limits and hands the call over to an obviously real human, complete with Indian accent.
That a dime per capita. Boo-hoo. Even if we could prosecute them (we can’t, no jurisdiction) it would cost $36 million to even make a dent in their business. Sham-wow alone might extort more than $36 million from US residents. American banks extort more than that from Americans iwith exorbitant fees, which go unchallenged and are blown off with a shrug. Walmort makes more tha $36 millilon just by rounding prices up to the next 88 cents.
American airlines all charge $200, just to change the date on your plane ticket – $400 if it’s international. Now who’s ripping us off? (British Airways charges nothing for that, and Emirates, Air France and Turkish only a small fraction of it.)
I have never received one of their calls, but if I did, I would fuck with them so bad. I saw the picture of FB of 2 arrestees, of course with their shirts pulled over their heads. Because they are so ashamed to show their faces. WTF.
I haven’t done it myself, but presumably those who buy ShamWow actually do receive a towel, correct? And if one does purchase a case of Beefaroni from Walmart— the price of which has been rounded up (fitting their infamous “attract customers by raising prices higher than other retailers” business model)— one does leave the store laden with said Beefaroni, does one not? Furthermore, am I alone in never once having received unsolicited calls from Walmart threatening me with arrest if I don’t transfer money to them using a prepaid money card?
These quibbling points aside, your comparison is bang on.
I’ve gotten calls like these, but they’ve been from a machine giving different identifications but always as “Officer” So and So from “The Justice Department” which has issued a judgment against (lengthy pause) you." (No, not my name, just “you”. Don’t understand what the pause is for.)
My parents got a call from these people (or a similar group) last week, with the usual threat to send the sheriff after them. I suggested to my mother that she dare them to do so, if they were ever to call back, as she’s in Connecticut, which has no sheriffs.
I usually don’t answer the landline phone, figuring any legitimate callers will leave a message, but the scammers, telemarketers and so forth will not. But I did answer the phone a few months ago because the Caller ID identified the call as being from the Children’s Cancer Recovery Foundation. So I kept the poor guy on the phone while I pulled up the article from the Tampa Bay Times that identified this group as one of the worst charities in America. He transferred me to a supervisor, who freely admitted that only a tiny fraction of donated money went to any legitimate purpose, so I said throwing money out the window would probably do more good than giving it to them. Weirdly, they haven’t called back (at least not based on the call log on the phone).
Some possible reasons for the pause come to mind:
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An intentional, dramatic effect
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A poorly written program which is playing back a blank audio file instead of suppressing it
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The “you” voice was poorly recorded as “…you” and the leading blank wasn’t stripped off
Total lefty bullshittery.