# Make me a New Name **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 8, 2008, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661 "2008-07-08T05:14:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/81 "2008-07-13T16:08:50Z")
[QUOTE=Derleth] Now that’s settled, maybe a female Doper could change her name to **Ibogaine Coca** and become your on-again, off-again lover who isn’t good for you but you just can’t quit. [/QUOTE] I’m also recruiting for a supercompetent-but-sassy secretary. And a former partner with whom I’m I had a nasty falling-out over a past case where everything went wrong… including him. And I’m waiting for Tuba to make the name change. That is right, isn’t it? Email Tuba for name changes? ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/82 "2008-07-13T17:32:31Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] And I’m waiting for Tuba to make the name change. That is right, isn’t it? Email Tuba for name changes? [/QUOTE] Yep, when I changed my name, I just emailed Tuba, and she was really quick and prompt and nice about it actually. I always envisioned her as being like the Wizard from the Wizard of Oz with the scary effects and all, but she’s quite approachable. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/83 "2008-07-13T18:45:08Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] I’m also recruiting for . . . a former partner with whom I’m I had a nasty falling-out over a past case where everything went wrong… including him. [/QUOTE] Dibs, if you’ll refer to me as “the fiendish **Dr. Drake**.” (The doctorate is in folklore, which is more sci-fi than noir, but since most criminal activity is technically folklore,\* it could work.) \*For the curious, because it’s informal and unofficial and yet also traditional, existing in endless variation, not because it doesn’t exist. ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/84 "2008-07-13T19:34:55Z")
> [@Roosh](#): > > Yep, when I changed my name, I just emailed Tuba, and she was really quick and prompt and nice about it actually. I always envisioned her as being like the Wizard from the Wizard of Oz with the scary effects and all, but she’s quite approachable. I emailed her once before on something, and got much the same feeling. I’m a little worried that she might not do it for me, because I’m offering to distribute scotch and haven’t sent any to her… 😛 [QUOTE=Dr. Drake] Dibs, if you’ll refer to me as “the fiendish **Dr. Drake**.” (The doctorate is in folklore, which is more sci-fi than noir, but since most criminal activity is technically folklore,\* it could work.) [/QUOTE] I’m a drunken squid private eye and I’m supposed to worry about blending the noir with a little sci-fi? The job’s yours, Doc. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/85 "2008-07-13T19:40:38Z")
! think Aunty Psychotic is a great name for a female user, but I digress! I doubt very much \*\*Diomedes \*\*will consider having his nads removed, just to suit a user-name! ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/86 "2008-07-13T19:42:21Z")
Does this mean that **“Why Should I Care What Your Imaginary Online Friends Call You?”** is now officially up for grabs? ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/87 "2008-07-13T19:52:35Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] I’m a drunken squid private eye and I’m supposed to worry about blending the noir with a little sci-fi? The job’s yours, Doc. [/QUOTE] Excellent! Fiendishly, Dr. Drake ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/88 "2008-07-13T19:55:02Z")
[QUOTE=Attack from the 3rd dimension] Does this mean that **“Why Should I Care What Your Imaginary Online Friends Call You?”** is now officially up for grabs? [/QUOTE] You’ve got the eye roll of approval from the Squidette. Are you ooking for an even ridiculously longer name? ---
**Author:** ![Hockey\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a183cd/32.png) [@Hockey\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hockey_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/89 "2008-07-13T20:51:30Z")
You could shorten it to **What My Imaginary Friends Call Me**. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/90 "2008-07-13T20:56:13Z")
**Captain Jetpack** ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2008, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/91 "2008-07-13T21:01:00Z")
Osmium Panda Electro-Mechanical Serpentine ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/92 "2008-07-14T02:24:51Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] I’m also recruiting for a supercompetent-but-sassy secretary. And a former partner with whom I’m I had a nasty falling-out over a past case where everything went wrong… including him. And I’m waiting for Tuba to make the name change. That is right, isn’t it? Email Tuba for name changes? [/QUOTE] She does manage to stay away for a couple days sometimes, as surprising as that is to some members. I think TubaDiva requires a chocolate bribe, but I may be wrong on her preference, or is that a Payola Bar. A new brand of fine chocolate bar. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/93 "2008-07-14T05:25:26Z")
[QUOTE=Harmonious Discord] She does manage to stay away for a couple days sometimes, as surprising as that is to some members. I think TubaDiva requires a chocolate bribe, but I may be wrong on her preference, or is that a Payola Bar. A new brand of fine chocolate bar. 🙂 [/QUOTE] I’m pretty sure that it’s both chocolate and scotch that soothes the savage Tuba. ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/94 "2008-07-14T17:36:39Z")
You know, I just got over the urge to call **Hockey Monkey** **pima**. Goodness only knows how long it will take me to stop wanting to call you **Dio**. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/95 "2008-07-14T18:19:15Z")
Welcome to the world, **Boozahol Squid, P.I.**! Can I be the first to shorten that to **BS**? ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/96 "2008-07-14T19:58:11Z")
My god. What have I done? ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/97 "2008-07-14T20:11:06Z")
You have doomed us all! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2008, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/98 "2008-07-15T17:02:11Z")
Am I the only one to find it a bit disconcerting to learn that we’re imaginary? ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2008, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/99 "2008-07-15T20:15:10Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] Am I the only one to find it a bit disconcerting to learn that we’re imaginary? [/QUOTE] You? Trust me, no one is more concerned than me. I mean, how can you guys be concerned if you’re just figments? ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2008, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661/100 "2008-07-15T20:29:47Z")
Actually I’ve been resigned to the fact that I’m probably imaginary for some time. So, no worries on this end. I’m more curious to learn if the girlfriend has found out that her new online nickname is “Squidette” yet. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-me-a-new-name/455661.md?page=6)