# Make my email work you LAZY FAT PIECE OF SHIT IT MOTHERFUCKERS **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 14, 2016, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166 "2016-04-14T05:18:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/21 "2016-04-14T14:56:31Z")
You won’t call IT, you won’t follow their instructions when you do call IT, and you won’t tell them what the problem is in the first place but it’s somehow their fault? Yeah, okay. ---
**Author:** ![Whiskey\_Dickens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9fc348/32.png) [@Whiskey\_Dickens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whiskey_Dickens)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/22 "2016-04-14T14:58:35Z")
Probably the best Pit OP I’ve read in a year or more. I also hate VPNs! It’s like trying to do your job while wearing mitts. It’s kinda the same, but everything feels weird and ends up taking twice as long as it should. Not sure about the name calling and plans to drag customers into it, though… ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/23 "2016-04-14T15:02:17Z")
> [@Whiskey\_Dickens](#): > > Probably the best Pit OP I’ve read in a year or more. First time in the Pit, I see. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/24 "2016-04-14T15:07:00Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > First time in the Pit, I see. He’s using VPN. It’s taking him twice longer than we thought. ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/25 "2016-04-14T15:41:52Z")
This will get even better when IT determines the problem is malware picked up by visiting some random message board during work hours. ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/26 "2016-04-14T15:48:49Z")
Have you tried turning it off and on again? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/27 "2016-04-14T15:52:04Z")
I think it’s hilarious when people are crazy pissed. This OP cracked me up. He is just so _mad_. It’s great. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/28 "2016-04-14T16:08:06Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > It’s always amusing when a pitting takes a 180 right out of the chute. Lambasting IT Fatsos on the SDMB was sure to go sideways. Frankly I’d take this as further evidence that the OP is clueless and context-blind. All together I’d give about a 85% probability that the root cause is between the keyboard and the chair. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/29 "2016-04-14T16:17:34Z")
It sure sounds like a layer 8 problem to me. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/30 "2016-04-14T16:37:09Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > It sure sounds like a layer 8 problem to me. While I traditionally go with PEBCAK, that’s probably my favorite euphemism. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/31 "2016-04-14T16:40:20Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > accounts pay-bo H-Dog?? They told us you wuz dead! ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/32 "2016-04-14T16:43:07Z")
> [@russian\_heel](#): > > I did nothing to change any of the settings on my computer. Sometimes “doing nothing to change any of the settings on your computer” is exactly the problem. I’m referring to those cases where IT has specifically instructed users that they need to change settings on their computers, because of an update or change in security policy. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/33 "2016-04-14T16:54:13Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Out of curiosity, what is your job? Grief counselor. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/34 "2016-04-14T17:10:16Z")
> [@russian\_heel](#): > > FINALLY, after a busy week, I have a hour or two to catch up on my emails. I’m wondering what busy job only requires checking emails once a week. > [@](#): > > I’m not calling you to fix my password issue YOU idiots fucked up. When a customer emails me, I’m going to email them back on my gmail account, copy my sales manager and your department, and let the customer know I cant help them because of YOUR incompetence. Oh and you know what else? I’m giving that customer YOUR cell phone numbers, so you can take a break from playing Farmville to handle their problems. I’m also wondering how you can receive emails from customers if you cant’ access your account. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/35 "2016-04-14T17:11:29Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Out of curiosity, what is your job? Amphetamine tester. ---
**Author:** ![Whiskey\_Dickens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9fc348/32.png) [@Whiskey\_Dickens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whiskey_Dickens)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/36 "2016-04-14T17:33:37Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Out of curiosity, what is your job? Hilary Clinton’s secretary. She had to use her personal account for the same reason, those same SHIT-FUCKING, ASS-DONUT I.T. people. ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/37 "2016-04-14T17:38:03Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Out of curiosity, what is your job? Caps Lock TESTER ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/38 "2016-04-14T17:40:08Z")
This thread has turned out way funnier than I expected. Great responses. At the companies I have worked at, involving the customer in an internal issue like this would get someone fired, and it wouldn’t be anyone in IT. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/39 "2016-04-14T17:50:11Z")
Nobody plays Farmville anymore ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2016, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166/40 "2016-04-14T17:58:17Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > He should probably try rebooting his machine. Chances are, he did something stupid and fucked his own machine up, or didn’t heed some kind of warning email that said “Do X by Y date, or your Outlook will no longer work.”. Or it’s possible, I guess, that he has managed to find one of those relatively rare situations where there is actually a problem that’s not easily solved because the helpdesk guy literally sees it 10 times every single day (the vast majority of client-side email problems). Beyond that… treating the IT guys like this is the fast track to the bottom of the priority queue… to be called sometime before Hell freezes over, but barely. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/make-my-email-work-you-lazy-fat-piece-of-shit-it-motherfuckers/752166.md?page=3)